[E] CH 9 – What does it mean to surrender, to bare your soul before another?

A delicate, mortifyingly cute ‘eep’ slipped from my lips. I bit down on my tongue, as though to stop myself from doing it again.

That was not a ‘Gellin’ sound. Gellin did not go ‘eep’ like some meek damsel. So why had I? Was the consulum right? Has the transformation truly changed me?

The arm around my back pressed more firmly into my skin—my naked skin. The small shift felt electric, sending sparks through the rest of me.

I was naked. Naked within a girl’s arms. My face mere inches from her own. I felt like a pinned rabbit, unable to breathe and waiting for the predator holding me to make their move.

“Gellin?” came her soft words.

Don’t call me that. The thought came unbidden. I’d always disliked my name. But there in the moment, it felt particularly wrong somehow. It shouldn’t have; it was my name. And yet it did.

Lilis’s eyes searched mine, as though she were trying to find the pieces to some question that only she knew. I was too terrified to open my mouth, fearful that some other pathetic mewl would follow. Certain that I wouldn’t be able to live it down.

“Right, I suppose you’ve never done this before,” Lilis stated, noticing my clear hesitation. She spoke the words so matter-of-factly that I couldn’t help but wince.

“H-how could you possibly know what I’ve…” My voice trailed off at the eyebrow raise she directed back, completely calling my bluff.

My gaze shifted away, too ashamed to meet her eyes. In this moment, it was she who held the control. I hated it—almost every part of my mind rebelling against the idea. All but the small growing seed deep within me that seemed to relish in it. I could feel it growing, ever so slowly spreading. Like a whisper in my ear, as I squirmed in her grip. I could get used to this feeling.

I jerked out of her grasp, almost falling against the sink. Briefly, I caught my reflection once again, the red succubus reflected back in all her embarrassed and naked glory.

Lilis stared at me, seemingly caught off guard and at a loss for words.

“I—I can’t,” I muttered. My head shook.

Despite everything, I still didn’t want to believe it; I didn’t want to accept the reality plainly in front of me. My back slid against the counter as I sunk down to the floor. Even without looking her way, I could almost tangibly feel the pitying gaze she was assuredly directing toward me.

All the while, another part of my mind raged, demanding that I stand and make her pay for making me feel this way. She’s doing this on purpose. She wants to humiliate me. I glanced up, narrowing my eyes. This is all just a ploy to control me, and I was just letting her do it. The anger began to broil up from seemingly nowhere. It was an emotion I understood.

The silence was thick, like a heavy miasma lingering in the room. Somehow she managed to cut through it.

“I’m… This is admittedly new to me too, as you might suspect.” Lilis stepped forward until she was only a foot away, hovering right above me. “But until you find a way to change back, if you find a way to change back,” she amended, the blunt truth making me wince yet again, “you will need to do this in one form or another.”

She held out a hand, knuckles forward. “So make your choice.”

The anger sunk like an overburdened ship full of holes. I stared, trying not to squirm. My mind was split in half, emotions rolling in an unceasing battle. Logically, I knew what the smart thing to do was: hold off until I had more information and suffer through the hunger until I knew what it would take to change back. Or at least until I knew more about my potential diet. I had a mouth full of teeth after all. Why shouldn’t I be able to eat some sort of food?

It was the safer plan—the one that didn’t leave me in the dark and at someone’s mercy. But as I fidgeted beneath her piercing gaze, my gut told me that I wouldn’t last.

How long until I gave in? A week? A day? …An hour?

My gaze was glued to the smooth skin along her arm, something about it demanding my attention.

Don’t do it, a part of me demanded. Yet the thought was ignored as I pressed forward. I grabbed her hand, expecting her to pull me upward. Instead, she leaned further toward me, bringing her fingers closer to my face as I continued to stare.

I knew the message she was trying to not-so-subtly send. This wasn’t really a mere favor, as she had claimed. Though I’d already known that from the beginning. She was establishing her dominance, making it blatant who was in control here. And she wanted me to seal it and effectively admit I had lost.

I am hers.

My other hand squeezed around my tail as the first hung limply in her grasp. Slowly, I looked up, meeting her eyes. She raised a brow, as though to say, “well?”

I fidgeted and looked away, unable to hold her gaze. My thighs squeezed together, spreading an unfamiliar, slippery wetness between my legs. I swallowed down the nerves threatening to overwhelm me.

F-fine. If this was what it took. Though I knew I was going to hate myself for this later, I couldn’t deny it any longer. Right now, I needed this. My eyes closed, even as a part of my mind rebelled. I could see my father’s scathing stare already. Have I taught you nothing all these years? I quivered as I leaned forward, until my lips pressed against her knuckles.

Pathetic.

In truth, I always did love defying him. Though, I never expected it to be in this sort of way.

Useless.

The kiss ended, and I opened my eyes, looking up once again to meet hers. Lilis released a heavy breath as she stared back. Something almost predatory in her gaze made me nervous, my eyes widening ever so slightly. The pupils in her own bright green eyes dilated and a shudder rolled through her body.

“You…” Her gaze narrowed as the girl bit her lip.

Then she tumbled downward, toppling me over and to the floor. Her hands wrapped around my upper arms, pressing them tightly against the chilling tiles as she straddled me. A fiery blaze flooded my body, and I squirmed beneath her grasp, too paralyzed by lust to react as I normally would.

Her eyes trailed down my form with a gaze so heavy that I was certain I could feel it brush against my skin. I felt more exposed than I ever had before. Tingles traveled down my neck, tickling my breasts as my lungs expanded with air, and then down along my belly to—to—

“Fuck,” Lilis gasped, out of breath. “You can’t just make this easy, can you?” The accusation caught me off guard almost as much as her tackle.

Was I doing this wrong?

Probably.

Finally, I met her eyes once more. There was a sharpness within that hadn’t been there earlier, a hunger that I was familiar with, though this time directed fully at me.

She cupped the side of my face, and her lips pressed against my neck.

Despite the shock rushing through me like a burst of lightning, my eyes closed, each kiss trailing down to my shoulders making me squirm. Just as I began to fret over what I was supposed to do, if anything, she leaned back up. My eyes eased open, to find hers piercing down into my soul.

At a whisper next to my ear, she said, “You’re lucky I like girls.”

I opened my mouth to protest—to say that I wasn’t a girl. But the words struggled to come.

Her fingers trailed down my stomach, slowly easing past my belly button, toward territories yet to be charted—at least by me. My back arched, and I sucked in a breath as pleasure shot up my spine, clouding my head. A loud moan met my ears, and I realized it was my own. As her fingers slid between my legs, I couldn’t help but push up against them.

My eyes blinked open, having closed at some point. Above was the smooth skin of her shoulder, exposed from her blouse having shifted at some point. Something about it called to me, and I found myself leaning upward. My lips pressed against soft skin just as her hand slid back up. I squirmed, my eyes rolling as I moaned open-mouthed against her shoulder. I could feel my tail twitching as it flailed beneath me, momentarily freed. With my eyes once more closed, I followed some instinct I didn’t realize I had…

And bit down.

Something in my mouth shifted, and sharp teeth pierced into her. A buttery warmth entered my mouth, the flavor surprisingly sweet as it touched my tongue. Without thinking, I bit harder, sucking up the sweet flavor. A muffled moan escaped my throat, followed by another from her, to my surprise. She shuddered, a full-body shudder so intense that I couldn’t help but do so along with her.

“Oh—oh, fuuck,” she groaned, the words slurring together.

A cloud engulfed my mind, full of gooey caramel and sweet spices. Everything felt lighter, time slowing to a leisurely crawl. My arms wrapped around her, pulling her body tighter against me. Each sip made my head feel just a bit fuzzier.

Something slipped inside me between my legs, and my eyes shot open. Her finger curled, and another followed the first in. The warm, filling touch was new, unfamiliar.

And gratifyingly delicious.

My lips fell from her shoulder, and my head bumped back against the floor. Her fingers slid back out, only to find a spot somehow even better. I moaned as she pressed against it, and this time it was I who shuddered.

“See, that wasn’t,” she took in a breath, “that hard.”

I stared up, my head so clouded that I wasn’t entirely sure what she meant. My eyes struggled to focus on her.

“Might have been,” she paused as her fingers slid downward, making me shiver, “a bit too much though.”

Her left forearm sat to my right, holding her up above me as she looked down. I met her gaze and she gave me a grin. I flashed her a dreamy smile back.

Then she dragged her fingers firmly up against the sensitive spot between my legs yet again. I gasped, my mind fogging further and a hot groan of pleasure rolling out of my throat.

I’d never been so sensitive. Certainly nothing close to this, where a simple brush of her hand had me seeing stars. It was a pleasure that was assuredly addictive.

Her hand increased in pace, sometimes slipping a finger or two inside, sometimes teasingly sliding all the way down to my thighs, but often hitting that special spot that lit me up like lightning thundering down through a deadwood tree.

In that moment, I truly was hers. Hers to play and toy with. Hers to control—her fingers becoming the strings that made me squirm and dance.

Slowly building…

Until with one last push and hit of euphoria, I hit the top.

The orgasm flooded through me, my back arching up towards her. Lilis grabbed my chin, staring into my eyes and drinking up my pleasure through them as though it were the elixir of life. I shuddered and moaned, the tides of pleasure repeating. Vixen that she was, Lilis only encouraged it, continuing to rub between my legs even harder than before.

My head felt dizzy, as though the euphoric cloud I’d been on had begun to spin. Then my teeth began to ache, as though begging me to bite into something.

Finally, it ended, the pleasure slowing to a crawl.

Lilis was smiling as she said, “Seeing the look in a girl’s eyes as she cums is honestly one of the best parts.”

For a long moment, I stared up at her dreamily. My head was too full of cotton candy and gooey caramel to think of anything to say back. As we laid out on the floor, I curled up against her, hugging her to me as I buried my face into her neck.

I didn’t want this moment to end.

Yet eventually, my mind began to reorganize, thoughts coming back to life. With my lust abated, reason reinstated itself.

Just what have I done?