Chapter 90. Hello Grandma

I am incredibly thankful some tropes are just tropes and some tidbits are just tidbits. In this particular case, I'm doubly glad Cy has no particular attachment to the collection of rags she was wearing since manifestation. While her demands regarding clothes are quite strict, they're entirely manageable in a way that would let us adhere to local morality and even fashion. Hooray for medieval ages being more accepting of multicolored clothes. Other than insisting she is to have no less than five colors on at the same time (More is permissible and enthusiastically welcomed, but five are deemed an absolute minimum. Wonder why. And why my mind jumped on five colors problem while thinking that over.), her other criteria were pretty sensible and something I would have myself suggested. Comfortable, not excessively loose, durable, plenty of pockets. Easy enough to accommodate, and Lily-Anne got some practice for her fashion shop, too. Now if only Margot would stop looking at me and Cy like we're the monsters in disguise. I mean, we're not in disguise here. Just monsters. Doing domestic things like any other domestic monster does.

Clothes and diet are handled, tentatively. I've taken my time walking with Cy around the Farmer's Square of the market, watching for any tell-tales something registers with her as hazardous, and insofar, nothing seems to crop up. She seems less interested than a kid her age would be in my shop, gravitating towards breads instead of sweets as kids usually do. Guess that part of trivia about her was true. Asking reveals that while she doesn't hate sweetness, her quite irregular teeth start aching if she eats something too sweet, so she tends to gravitate towards the less sugary treats. Something with a touch of sour or bitter is even better, as the taste-testing reveals. She loves dried fruits.

Magically-wise... Uuuh. Very much uuuh. While Cy is not in any way ready to use the formalized magic, she has more than enough oomph for it. Easily on par with me. She also has a bunch of pretty chaotic spells that she can apparently fire off on more or less instinct and gut feelings. I am intensely thankful she does not seem to have any uncontrollable auras. She CAN flare up an aura of chaos that fucks with probability and entropy rates within the area of effect, though. Or, translating to common tongue - if she so wants, her immediate surroundings will become full of surreal pratfalls and things failing oddly. Usually, not too dangerously, but practically always, embarrassingly so. This is actually a very good defense, when you think about it. Because embarrassing means different things for different people - and what would be embarrassing for an assassin? To fail and be caught fumbling is a likely answer to that.

The next test (one I'm more than a little nervous about) is how well Cy plays with other unusual abilities. Mine are not in question, she essentially comes from me in ways that are probably even more intimate than "flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood", given that she is essentially the quintessence of my thoughts, fears and hopes. Which, by the way, is more than a little baffling, because I'm more than a little ambivalent on the topic of actually HAVING children. It's bringing them up that makes me fear I'm going to fluff it up. Let's just say my first life's set of parents left a lot of room for improvement. The current ones are incomparably better in every regard. Speaking of which... The test is simple - Bridgit's quantum instability trick. Much to my relief, for that trick, Cy doesn't seem to be any different from any other person.

And now, we're at the Gillespie estate. Bridgit is enjoying her well-earned headpats and hugs after bringing everyone here. Everyone being harem and Cy, that is. I'd teleport them all in with my own magic, but Bridgit's trick is far less dangerous of the two. I need to figure out how it works and see if I can apply the findings to the teleport I know. It would be helpful if I didn't run the risk of driving everyone around nuts each time I bamf around... Admittedly, I rarely use it also because I have an instance pretty much everywhere I care to appear quickly, and it is easier and safer for me to just shunt the... huh. Actually, how do I shunt the mass like this without any odd effects? Might look into it too. For now... Family.

As it turns out, the father is still out there. Either in Haver or... I surreptitiously check, and yes, he is advancing towards the estate, but it will be a couple days before his impromptu caravan is here. Oh well. Let's see what mother makes of it. I knock on her door.

"Yes, what is... Alyssa? What's going on?" - she inquires, as she peeks out of the door. I catch a whiff of floral oils being aspirated wafting out.

"Hello, mom. Experimenting with bouquet aromas?" - I offer. She nods and shrugs.

"Not every floral oil mixes well, some produce quite... dreadful aromas. I'd never have guessed some of the combinations could smell so revoltingly." - she admits - "Some others, like this one, on the other hand... Pretty nice. But enough about perfumes, I believe there are more pressing matters, given the company. Introduce us?"

I wince. Yes, that was a bit... off. "Sorry. I'm off the kilter today." - I admit - "Everyone, this is my mother, Elene Gillespie. Mom, this is my... well, harem. Bridgit you already know, and I daresay you should recognize princess Lily-Anne. Next to her is Moon Unit, recently titled lady Lux. The girl next to Bridgit is Roxolane. Finally, the little rascal that just nabbed your spoon is Cy." I lean over to take the mixing spoon from the grinning child, and ruffle her hair, returning the spoon to flabbergasted mother with other hand - "I am very suddenly finding myself with a daughter of my own, and I think I need some advice."

"But... how!?" - Elene yelps, as she looks from me to Cy and to me again - "Alyssa, what did you do? This couldn't be the ordinary birth, I am quite certain I'd notice if you happened to be pregnant when you were eight yourself."

I sigh and wrap my arms loosely around Cy - "Wizard's Nightmare, mom. Apparently, one bad enough for Memiri to step in to sort out the situation. Speaking of which, I'm also apparently the first ever person to actually get a letter from a goddess." Elene blinks a lot as I hand her the letter in question. She is very confused as she briefly reads it through and returns it, shaking her head in wondrous incredulity.

"Only you, Alyssa. Only you." - she sighs, then crouches in front of Cy - "Hello there. I am your grandmother Elene."

"Grumma!1Grandma!" - she gets in return as my little abomination hugs her around the neck - "Floowur booler!2Flower bottler!"

Elene twitches a little at the lisp, and shakes her head bemusedly - "Flower boiler, huh? Well, it's true, in a sense."

"Nah! Na buller, booler! Floowur ina boole.3Nah! Not boiler, bottler. Flower in a bottle." - Cy explains.

"Oh. Flower bottler? I guess I am. Though really, I'm more of an experimenter nowadays." - she quips, as she ruffles Cy's hair and stands up - "I've taken a cue from you and started my own little enterprise, Alyssa. Too many people want the flower essence to handle it by myself. I don't suppose you have any advice on organizing this better? ...Actually, no, wait. Explain something to me first. Harem? Weren't you engaged to prince Edward?"

I blink. "Yes, but things happened, and now I'm engaged to Lily-Anne instead." - I reply - "And that engagement acknowledges Lily-Anne is joining a harem... I could have sworn I mentioned that before, mom."

She puts her hands on her hips. "No, you most certainly did not." - she retorts sharply - "Alyssa, just what is going on over there in Parsee?"

Sighing, I resign myself to a long and complicated explanation. At least I do have my harem to corroborate and aid my story. But still, this promises to be a lengthy and difficult conversation.

___

"...Madness." - is mother's verdict to the whole story - "Pure and unadulterated madness, all of it. Honestly, if that's how things were going, I'm not surprised you've been having nightmares. Alyssa, you are trying to do too much in the same time. You need to learn to pace yourself and set aside more time for rest. Just surrounding yourself with love and care is not enough if you're not partaking of it."

"I'm trying!" - I object - "There's just always something to do."

"Well tell that something to come back tomorrow." - she insists - "You can't just overlook this, Alyssa."

"Trying, mom. TRYING very hard. I have resolved not to start anything new until next year at the very least." - I retort - "As soon as the end terms in the Academy are over, I'm taking my harem, my daughter and my airship and going on a leisure cruise all over the place."

"And no haring off to put out every spark personally." - she continues - "I know you have people watching over everything, let them handle the situations. By your own labors, there is always a way to tell you if something is beyond their ken."

"That's the plan, yes." - I agree.

She sighs. "I hope you truly mean it, dear." - Elene mutters - "And not just telling me what you think I want to hear right now."

Ok, so... mother also thinks I'm overworked. Admittedly, she was already thinking that before I even went to Academy, but still... Aside from that, she is oddly fine with my harem, though she did take some time to put some poignant questions to each of them. Mostly Moon Unit and Lily-Anne, though. I guess I can understand why she has less to ask of Bridgit, but why Roxolane gets a pass is more of a mystery. Or maybe mother's focus is more on who can get away with the most, in which case Moon Unit and Lily-Anne indeed do take the lead by far. Lily-Anne because she technically outranks me, even though I'm nominally the harem mistress here, and Moon Unit because elves had always maintained their notions of superiority, and although I've yet to see anything of the sort from her, my mother doesn't know that much yet.

Even odder, Cy gets a complete pass and acceptance, in spite of things I thought mother would at least point out. Maybe she's saving those for later, though. I did say I was in need of advice and all that. Speaking of whom, where is... Oh. OOoh dear. She found boys. Or boys found her. Ooh fiddlesticks on the grill, that's going to be odd... Antoine is sporting polka-dot glowing hair. And Jean-Paul... "...Cy, you will return them back to original condition once you're done playing, I hope?" - I inquire - "Because while Jean-Paul is surprisingly apt at fluttering around with his oversized ears, it might be a little bit too much for ordinary people."

"Hokay!" - my little abomination responds cheerfully, while doing... something with a pillow. Which grows legs and scampers off after Antoine, butting him under the knees until he falls over on top of the pillow and starts riding it like some sort of demented throne, shrieking and laughing through all of it.

"I can see why you wanted advice." - mother offers from behind me wryly - "You were rambunctious at that age, but not quite as free with magic as your own daughter seems to be."