Chapter 40

As I was getting a ride from Mara, the things I saw and heard kept repeating in my head.

Gruesome fights that came after a somewhat mild preliminary. Talks about dreams and hobbies. I couldn't throw them away. The whole ride, we sat in a car silently.

An hour later, we reached my home. As I was getting ready to leave the car, my hand was suddenly caught by Mara.

"I hope you will think about what I've said." her eyes glued to my face.

"I… will try."

I was finally left alone. Trying to shake off the feeling that was left by Mara. Looking at the car driving away, I couldn't help but think, why did she tell this to me? Was it even THAT important?

As I made my way up to my flat, I was greeted by a father and mother duo.

"You are late today Erlig," Annie took my bag from me while I went to wash my face and hands.

"Something happened?" After washing up the soap from my hands and quickly splashing my face with some water, I felt how Greg placed a hand on my shoulder. "You can always talk to us."

Turning around, I saw his face, which was somewhat worried. "We are your parents, and if you have something that you need to get off your chest, we can lend you a shoulder or two." Annie returned just in time for Greg to hug her.

"Is something the matter?" What happened to them?

"You look troubled, Erlig," Annie said softly.

"Am I?" I touched my face but couldn't find anything out of place. However, thinking back about this hobby and dream talk... It probably affected me more than I thought. "Actually, there is something I want to ask you."

"Hum-hum, that's good. Let's talk in the kitchen. You are probably hungry."

"Now that you mention this," my stomach rumbled, "It's a good idea."

The three of us went to the kitchen, and as Annie started to heat up the food, Greg and I sat down.

"So, what was it about? Do you have trouble at the gym? Or maybe…"

"Love troubles!?" Annie turned around abruptly, her eyes glinting unnaturally, as she held a small spatula.

"No, it's not like that." I hastily shook my hands, much to the disappointment of Annie. "I talked with a… friend of mine today, and we talked about dreams."

"Dreams?" Greg raised one of his eyebrows while rubbing his chin. "What about them? You've had nightmares lately?"

"No, I mean more of desire, an aspiration or ambition."

"Oh, that." he nodded understandingly.

"And, I have this feeling that I don't have a dream of my own." I tried to voice up my anxiety carefully.

"There's nothing wrong with that."

"Yeah, but I've got this feeling like I'm missing or forgetting something."

"Forgetting!?" Annie once again turned around to look at us, the pair of father and son. "Is it about…"

"This isn't about memory loss or anything like this. Well, how to explain it," I rubbed my nose bridge, "I've got this feeling like I've lost that thing I wanted to achieve in my childhood."

"So you wanted to ask us what you wanted to do in your childhood?" Annie smiled sadly.

"It's not this either," I shook my head, "I wanted to ask what are your dreams, and what about those that you discarded."

With his arms crossed, Greg lowered his head, a sign that he was deep in thought.

"Stepmother, what was your dream back in the days, or right now?" I decided to start with Annie.

"Huh? Dream? My dream?" she absentmindedly stirred something with her spatula. "My dream…" she muttered, "I only have one dream right now, for our family to be healthy and always together." she smiled, albeit her smile wasn't confident.

"And what about your childhood?"

"Childhood? Mmm…" She rolled her eyes upwards to look at the ceiling while her petite feet tapped a few times. "I've dreamt of becoming a dancer, but soon enough, I understood that I've got no talent for this." she sighed. "However, even without that dream, I'm still happy right now."

"Thank you for answering."

"Don't worry about this. After all, I'm your stepmother, oh, your food is ready." she blushed slightly and brought me a plate of stir-fried vegetables. "Eat up."

Though I didn't like vegetables much in my past life, the ones that Annie made were always delicious.

"Erlig, you know my only dream was to have a son I could be proud of."

As I was slowly eating, Greg suddenly interrupted his silence. "My dream was to give you everything that you would need, but I failed at doing it." he sighed deeply and rubbed the corners of his eyes. As he did it, Annie hurried to hug him.

"No, you did great…" I wanted to cheer him up, but…

"You don't need to say this, I've had lots of passing infatuations, yet the only dream I wanted to make real the most… I failed…" He glanced at me. "I only hope you won't repeat my mistakes. That's why you should work hard."

"I will." That was unexpected.

"If you would excuse us, we will rest early." Greg went with Annie in hand.

Rest early? I glanced toward the clock. It was half-past midnight. A rather strange excuse if I take time into consideration. They left, probably because Greg didn't want to talk about his dream, and what could've been his dream? I guess something concerning me, or maybe his deceased wife.

Though I didn't come close to what I wanted to do.

After finishing up all the food, that was left, I quickly did the dishes and went to my room. It turned out I had an unread message.

"You should take a day off tomorrow. You can visit the school and rack up your attendance list." A message from Jessie. Strange, did they have something to do? I wanted to call her and ask what happened, but it was too late already, and I decided to call it a day.

I met the morning of the next day in complete solitude. There were no signs of Greg or Annie. I took some corn flakes and milk, and after eating a few bowls, I quickly finished my morning routine.

"Yawn." Though I got used to getting up for the gym when I needed to visit the school, I still felt like I lacked some more sleep.

As I walked through the streets that I've already seen so many times, I felt like this sleepiness had another meaning. Though I walked from college and back home all the time, I made it almost unconsciously. My every visit to the gym was the same. Though I had enough spare time, I didn't have enough interest to walk out and do something else. That was probably what an office worker felt. Going to the same places for a major part of their life.

It was almost like a…

"Cycle." I looked at a trash bin. Near this bin, an empty can was lying.

"What the hell am I thinking about?" I wanted to kick the can, yet something inside of me didn't let me do it.

As I looked around, winter had already come. It was the second of December. Though there was no snow, people have already started putting up long thick outerwear, hats, and gloves. Still, just like before women, walking around were all beautiful, and even such thick clothing couldn't hide their figures.

Yet I was stuck with a bunch of weirdos of girls.

Wait, why did I think I was stuck with them? A cold wind has flown, making me shudder.

The city that lost its summer luster turned out to be grey, and the dirt that was usually washed away by rain started accumulating due to dry weather.

As I was walking towards the school gates, I couldn't put up with the season change. I've spent so much time, yet I didn't make any kind of memory. I knew terribly little about this world, the people around here.

Though the most disgusting thing was understanding that it was the same in my previous world. I spent my time mindlessly. If a tourist suddenly came up to me and asked for directions, I wasn't sure that I could help him. I didn't even know my birthplace that well, back in my previous world.

The more I thought about it, the more pissed off I became. Usually, with a season change, the protagonist would change significantly.

It was me, who was the protagonist, I was the one who happened to transmigrate, yet I didn't change.

"Fuck!"

As I made my way towards the classroom, I once again saw the girls and boys not giving a damn about the dress code.

"Hey, Jet, how are you!"

"Big guy!?" Sitting in his seat Jet was surrounded by Elle and Joanne. They chatted about something happily, and this idyll was broken by me.

Elle looked at me, her eyes burning with anger if looks could have killed…

I lifted up my arm to greet them, only to hear a huff from Elle. As she took Joanne's hand, they both went towards their own seats.

"Look at them go. They are angry, aren't they?"

"Well, Elle is, not so sure about Joanne." Jet smiled wryly.

"Whatever, it doesn't matter to me," I grumbled and started taking out the studying material.

"You look like you are in a bad mood. Something happened?" Jet nudged me with his elbow.

"You know what." I turned around to look at him. "Yeah, a lot of shit happened to me, and I don't even know what the hell I want to do with it."

"At least you don't want to drown in this shit."

"I can't be so sure."

"Yo, what happened?" he took my shoulder and moved closer, "Is it Reid again?"

Seeing him so worried, maybe he could help me?

"No, it's something more personal."

"Can you tell it to me?" he lowered his voice.

"Do you think I've changed?" I asked him what I wanted to know the most. The bell rang, and the class started, yet we continued to talk with Jet, albeit with a whisper.

While the teacher, a middle-aged man, was writing something on a blackboard, Jet answered. "Of course you did! You've changed a lot. It's like a new person was born."

Right, I forgot this body had a previous owner. Damn, what the hell was happening with me. If this question is a waste, let's ask something different.

"Hey, and do you think you changed a lot?" As I asked this question, I let my pen down. "Do you think you are not like yourself from three months ago?"

"Changed? I… I don't know, do you think I changed?" he sounded flustered as he lowered his head and looked at me from below.

"No, well, I don't really know, that's why I asked you. What do you think?" I turned towards him and urged him.

"Probably I've changed? Somewhat. It's difficult to answer. Can you somehow narrow down the criteria?"

I rolled my eyes. "Do you think you grew up as a man? No, as a person? Your worldview changed or your personality?"

"Huh, well, yeah, I think I grew up."

"Especially in courage, mister Burke." We were suddenly interrupted by a male voice that sounded pissed off. "So you think it's a norm for you to not pay any attention to your teacher?"

"No, well, I didn't mean to do this, I only answered a small question." Jet looked around, seeking something to help him, his face started slowly getting red in color.

"I think you grew splendidly, enough to pay a visit to the student's guidance counselor."

"No, wait, please…" he looked at me like he was trying to say two things simultaneously. Why wasn't I getting scolded, and why I wasn't helping him.

As the teacher traced Jet's gaze, he looked at me and scoffed. "If you dare to talk instead of listening to the class, you should have the courage to receive punishment. With this, you would be able to grow up splendidly."

As he said this, I heard a few stifled laughs. Looking back, they mostly came from Reid's goons while most of the students were, as always, bored.

The teacher went back and resumed his lesson while Jet looked disheartened by this exchange.

I felt pity for him. His standing was probably low enough. I still thought he was in a relationship with Elle, and being ridiculed in front of a lover, probably was unpleasant, to say the least.

"Don't worry, pal."I patted his back lightly. "If it's a talk with the student's guidance counselor, I will work this out alone."