42: Recapitulation
"And so it was that we came to be alone, particularly desperate to reach the Yamakuni Sanctuary here." Kana intoned with a faraway look on her face. She was reliving the details of their recent experiences from her memory as she spoke, all the way from when she first met Fuzō up until the attack on their wagon.
A platter of pastries and warm tea sat untouched on a low sofa-table before Kana, recently brought in by the nurse from before during a lull in the conversation. However, the girl couldn't bring herself to touch any of it until she'd gotten through recounting her tale. She needed her concentration, so as to prudently leave out any particularly troublesome details pertaining to her abilities and ulterior motives as they came up. One thing Kana did expand upon was her unexplained feeling of familiarity with Fuzō and some doubts about her own origins, setting up her later line of questioning. Kana had not forgotten her goals.
Kaoru sat in an upholstered armchair identical to and across from the one in which Kana was seated, maintaining a respectful and attentive silence. The older woman's expression had changed subtly throughout the girl's account, but the once again Kana could not spare the attention need to interpret any meaning from this, save that her words were having an impact on Kaoru.
After Kana described in intricate detail the death of Ryuu and her split-second choice to abandon the wagon to save herself and Fuzō, Kaoru looked to be on the edge of her seat.1 An English idiom I failed to remember for the longest time, which means:"watching or listening to something with great interest especially because one does not know what is going to happen"I wish I could convey how I struggled to remember this idiom and ones with similar nuance.Anyway, ignore me, not important
Fuzō's mother covered her mouth with her hands and looked away towards the other side of the room, where the medical partition stood concealing the form of her resting daughter. The pain and recognition in her eyes did attract Kana's attention. Perhaps Kaoru had known Ryuu somehow, but it was anyone's guess. Why else would she react like that?
Coming to a pause, Kana decided breeze over the last few days before their arrival,
"So seeing the destruction behind me, even in my rage, I fled night and day to reach the place Fuzō-san described to me. Eventually arriving at your gates and passing through successfully, your daughter assured me that we would both be welcome here. Though I confess, I still do not entirely understand why. Fuzō-san and I were both of the opinion that I could find many of the answers I seek here."
With a swish of her hand, Kana indicated her own flowing maroon hair, "But there seems to be several misunderstandings getting in our way. Overall though, that is how your daughter came to be in her current state. That is how I came to accompany her."
Kana sighed and ran a hand through the forelocks draping over her face, her tone full of frustration and distaste to reflect her underlying emotions, "Yes... the combined destruction of Ame, the incompetence of Fumio and the Yuka members, the exhaustion of our travels, and those monstrous butchers have all brought Fuzō to this grievous state. As for what all Fuzō has been through before we met... she will have to tell you that herself."
Thoughts of Fuzō's agony crossed Kana's mind. She didn't feel comfortable speaking for the wounded woman. Kana feared she lacked the words to convey all that her erstwhile traveling companion had endured. Instead she redirected her inquiries back to Kaoru,
"So tell me then, as I have told you, how we came to meet in this place as it occurred from your perspective."
Kaoru took a moment to get ahold of her facial expressions, wiping her face with with her handkerchief as she had many times throughout Kana's recount.
"Kana-sa... Kana" was all she managed to get out before her voice faltered and failed her. She seemed somehow overcome by what she'd heard, struggling to say what she wanted to.
"First, Kana-sama, please let me address you as such. Aside from anything else we need discuss, you have undoubtedly earned my respect. In spite of such brutality.... facing monstrous killers. The lengths you have gone through for my daughter are not something that can be repaid or encompassed with mere thanks. Truly, truly, I- "
Kaoru's breathing faltered as well now, with a wheezing sob. The woman's face and demeanor was somewhat cold, reserved in an awkward way, like she had trouble allowing herself to show what she meant to Kana. But her words and actions were all flush with compassion.
Not warm and pitying like Michiko, nor quiet and long-suffering like Fuzō, but piercing and pointed like a needle. Of the three who had shown Kana recognizable compassion, Kaoru's feelings seemed to strike the sharpest. Why that was, Kana could not say. It was just her impression in that moment.
With the woman's next words, the stern and reserved Kaoru broke down and wept openly,
"- I could not imagine... going this far for someone effectively a stranger to you. My husband and I are not fighters, we needed the help of warriors to be of any aid to Fuzō, and yet... Where our own clan failed us, you succeeded on your own." Kaoru's voice wavered with bewilderment, her inability to comprehend Kana's affiliation also clearly apparent.
"My dear Fuzō told no lies: no matter our ignorance of you, you are always welcome here." She paused yet again, shaking her head over and over before gazing pointedly at Kana's hair, tears wetting her eyes,
"I had my doubts, yes, for I simply could not believe everything I was seeing. It is without question now, you possess our bloodline and recognition. And whatever answers you seek, I shall do my best to answer personally and as the Mistress of the Yamakuni Sanctuary. You possess also the authority to know anything I know, even if neither I nor my husband knows why. That knowledge is your prerogative."
The stiff posture and tension released from Kana's shoulders hearing that.
To clear these misunderstandings, Kana had to speak with uncomfortable candor (albeit with prudence), but now it seemed she was finally getting somewhere. Answers, and a welcome to stay in a place much safer than any she had ever come to before. Free and clear of more dangerous complications. It was progress. Satisfying progress at the price of strained patience. It was a test of her resolve to get this far, but it looked as if the payoff would be worth it. Probably?
And there was one question on her mind more than any other right now,
"This authority. You have mentioned it before, about my chakra signature holding authority. What exactly do you mean?" Placing her palms together in front of her mouth, Kana focused rapt attention on the woman before her.
"Ah, you really weren't aware? I guess... even if you do not come from our homeland, I had hoped instead you might be able to shed some light on this matter. In truth, your chakra holds high-ranking authority over the barrier systems and formula here. Authority that outranks mine." She gave a little self-deprecating laugh at that.
At Kana's silence and prompting hand gesture, Kaoru continued, "You see, Hisao and I were immediately suspicious when we detected your entry here. We are the appointed overseers of the sanctuary. It is not just anyone who outranks us when it comes to the security here. And all of them we know of are nobility and clansmen back in the Land of Whirlpools. Seeing as we could not identify yours, that led to our... unfortunate first encounter."
A sort of awkwardness peeled back Kaoru's lips, and she let out a nervous puff of laughter as both Kana and Kaoru recalled their respective embarrassment at the scene they'd made.
"R-Rest assured, Kana-sama, everyone here will be appraised of your status and welcome here as an honored guest. I once again apologize for the unsightly rudeness involved with our introduction."
Kana replied with a stiff nod of her own, more than willing to move on to more productive conversation again.
A bit more back-and-forth explanation led to Kana getting some understanding of the function and inner working of the barriers here, as well as a healthy dose of basic underlying theory about fūinjutsu2Sealing Techniques as a whole.
This produced many exciting thoughts and questions in Kana's mind, above all relating to her past and identity. She craved that particular knowledge. It was core to her heart. If it was as she had suspected all that time ago atop Mt. Shumisen, then her past could be her key to future happiness.
"So the barrier formula's recognition works by chakra and bloodline registry? Then, I am recognized. I am- am truly of the same bloodline, right? Therefore, I have been registered in your formula? My name... my name is there? I-"
If Kana knew of her name, a name given before she was taken... then it could lead to all else.
At her eagerness, Kaoru's expression grew complicated,
"Normally that is so, as Overseers we can see the names of anyone registered in the encrypted formula as they arrive, usually with their relation and position as well."
"Then-!" The raw anticipation strained Kana's usually soft and melodic voice.
"But not yours." Kaoru said firmly, "We do not have the authority to oversee someone with your ranking signature. It's just too high."
Anger, brief but intense, clenched Kana's jaw tight before she let the feeling go. It did not serve her to feel anger now. A brief pulse of chakra around her body did intensify the atmosphere though.
Still, Kana put a hand to her forehead in stunned frustration, leaning back in her armchair and shaking her head, "You don't have the auth- ...you two are the Lord and Lady of this place, no? The Overseers? How do you not have the authority? How can you be telling me any of this, then?", the skepticism clear in her tone.
Kaoru sighed in response as well, a wry twist at the corner of her lips,
"I believe you now understand why Hisao and I reacted so warily. As I said, it is not just anyone who outranks us. And of those, even fewer have the privilege of being unidentified by the barrier formula. Even after a normal test of your signature with a security tag, we would have still been wary. I would have doubted the authenticity. But it was more than that."
Her expression turned deadly serious now, an awed look in her eyes,
"But your identity was verified and authenticated as one of the first in our formula by the security tag, entered and guaranteed with the signature of the barrier's creator herself. Someone of my lowly position as Overseer would not dare to doubt her, the formidable Lady Mito Uzumaki. We suffered the consequences of our doubt when the security tag exploded. I have no reservations about explaining any of our secrets to you, if she was the one who authorized it."
Kaoru gasped a bit, having said all of that in one fervent breath, before calming herself and settling into a more even tone,
"I'm sorry. I do not know who you are either, Kana, if you were worried about such a thing, but... I see now that someone as preeminent as Mito-sama considers you to be very important. Only she would have that knowledge, her chakra necessary to access this part of the seal. Should you ever wish to know more along those lines, I think it would be best if you sought out The Vulpine Lady of Konohagakure herself."
Kana's mouth opened and closed a few times, but no words came out.
Disappointment, relief, anticipation, hope. All that she had gone through to reach here, only to have such confusing context. This was... a lot to think about. An extremely overwhelming sense of longing and confusion brewed underneath the surface of her mind. Where to even begin? It would take a while to know how she should even think about all of this.
Someone, someone important... considered Kana important. Vague memories of things Michiko said long ago crossed her mind.
Family... something to cherish. In her past, it seemed Kana might really have had something like that as well.
"Kaoru-san... sorry, I'm having trouble taking this all in. I think... I think I need a moment." Kana's voice held a pain and longing that touched Kaoru's heart, evidenced by the robed woman's creased expression.
Kaoru nodded with knowing seriousness, but she indicated the refreshments on the table between them,
"I'm afraid I cannot offer much in the way of reassurances, or what path you should take, but... Why not have a break and have something to eat? I won't go anywhere, so take your time. By all means, you haven't had a second to rest since you arrived here after all of that, have you?"
Did Kana detect... exasperation in Kaoru's voice?
Kana glanced down at the food and drink before her. She still hadn't felt particularly hungry all this time, with rather more important matters in her focus, but there was an admittedly tempting scent to it all. It had registered at the corner of her mind for a while now.
Food, huh? Her nutrition experiments had been put on hold for quite a while, indeed. And a normal person would probably partake without hesitation, so for the sake of maintaining appearances... Maybe this distraction was what she needed, some time to relax and think.
"Thank you then, Kaoru-san."
"No matter, I had it prepared for you in the first place. I would be sad if you couldn't enjoy it."
Picking up a fruity-smelling square pastry, Kana contemplated these words.
Since she'd awakened from the ritual, food wasn't something she particularly categorized as 'enjoyable'. Just something to think about, an option, or a potential way to grow stronger. Thus it was easy to resist the tempting smell from earlier. She just didn't think it would be any different.
That changed after one bite.
"Wha-?" Kana's eyebrows rose slowly as she rolled the taste around in her mouth. Full of flavor, sweet and refreshing. Warm and chewy. A small pleasure like she had never experienced before.
"I think..." Kana said with a passionate and astounded voice, "I think this is the nicest thing I have ever eaten."
She picked up the ceramic teacup and sipped it. The temperature was pleasantly warm and the light herbal fragrance washed down the pastry perfectly.
A confused Kana looked up at Kaoru, a line of tears gently running from one of the girl's eyes. She was so bemused by the flavor that she hardly even noticed the wetness flowing down her cheek until the first droplet hit her lap.
"I, I haven't... ever eaten anything this nice before, have I?" Why did the flavor seem so nostalgic then? So palpably intense, bringing flashes of faint memory, of blurry pale faces with dark red hair.
It couldn't be, could it?
And wait, her sense of taste must have been enhanced as well, hadn't it? The reason why everything tasted unappealing until now, was it because her senses had changed? Then why did... the whole experience make her feel so... warm inside?
Successfully distracted, Kana partook of each of the pastries, light tears flowing from her eyes from the newfound sensation.Stimulation of a kind she had little experience with, but was fulfilling all the same.
What it made her feel, she did not know, save that it was undoubtedly a fragment of the happiness she was looking for.
Kaoru watched it all with an agitated sorrow, a pity and compassion that threatened to bring her to tears once more.
The girl, the child before her... what was her life like, for her to behave like this? All of the context, with everything she'd heard... it was heartbreaking. Kaoru did not cry easily since steeling her heart, since her daughter left all those years ago. But this Kana was melting her ability to hold back those feelings,
"Our cook must have done his best to make sweets you might like, after all it's... been a long time since we had any... children around."
Kaoru's own eyes grew a faraway look as she said this, gazing at the young girl's puffed cheeks as she savored more and more of the pastries in her mouth. Her heart clenched with warmth and nostalgia.
Earlier that day, far from the Yamakuni Sanctuary, a particular place lay hidden away, largely unoccupied for quite some time. A place of work, a place of secrets.
On a table in a particular room, a private room hidden away in a peaceful corner of a particular building, there lay an azure crystal on a small pedestal.
A crystal long cherished, a crystal long dormant.
From it, a faintly Amethyst glow emitted, weak but present nonetheless.
A tired voice took notice, whispering a wish both hopeful and confused,
"Masumi?"