134 — Adding Fuel to the Flames III (Conclusion)

Mia's POV:

"Hey, are you okay, you sound strange..."

Mia kept one hand on the phone, her other hand brushing her hair in front of the vanity mirror. The knots came off, smooth, silk running through her fingertips. She smiled widely at her reflection, the light casting a shine on her hair.

"Yeah, I'm fine... just... a little overwhelmed, I guess."

Came the response from the other end of the line. Jae-il's voice sounded tired. Mia could almost visualize his eyes, heavy and drooping. Like a very lazy cat. Her heart leapt and flip-flopped like a beached fish. She laughed. "You? Overwhelmed? How unusual."

The only sounds for a moment was her brother breathing on the other side of the line and the bristles of her hairbrush gently raking through the ends of her hair.

Then he exhaled deeply, before his low voice trickled through again.

"Might be because of the big game coming up, or I'm feeling a bit of an aftereffect of the last win."

"Hmm..." Mia stopped brushing and stood up, bare feet lightly thudding on the floor. She hopped on the bed, sitting cross-legged on top. The mattress dipped at the sudden impact. "Is that really it? Why do I feel like you're not telling me everything?"

"... just my overthinking getting to me, that's all. My brain sometimes goes on hyperdrive after games."

"Can't relax when it does, right?" Mia finished for him. She stared at the wall, eyes slightly narrowed as she listened to him.

"You could say that."

"Do you..." She started, trying and failing to not bite on her lip. "Want to talk about it...?"

His response wasn't immediate. Mia knew he was probably trying to consider how much he'd like to reveal to his ever-meddlesome sister.

Then...

"The usual stresses of being a young person who is pursuing a professional career, Noona..."

It came out deadpanned, not quite irritated, just wry and humorless.

"You know..." Mia turned, lying stomach-down on her bed. Her legs wiggled in the air, a movement completely unconscious as she pressed her cellphone to her ear and closed her eyes. "If you came back home now, I could make you feel a lot better~" She made a jerking motion with her hand, chuckling a bit, both amused and enticed, somehow.

"I wish..."

Jae-il chuckled as well, but it sounded hollow, half-hearted. She frowned, her swaying legs stopping for a minute.

"You really can't come by for the night...?"

"Not tonight, Noona. But I promise I'll make it up to you when I'm home again."

"You better." She said, trying to keep her voice light. "Big time. I'm keeping a list."

A soft huff of laughter from him.

"I know you are."

Mia could hear him breathing. He was probably lying on his dorm bed, one arm behind his head, staring at whatever boring ceiling they had over there. And she could also tell that he wasn't really in the right headspace for talking, because unlike their usual conversation, this was more muted, with more silence in between words.

"Hey, you still there?"

"Hmhm."

The sound was low, almost sleepy. Mia pressed the phone tighter to her ear, like she could reach through it and touch him.

"You sound tired." She remarked.

"I am."

"Then sleep."

A pause.

"Can't yet."

She rolled onto her side, curling around the phone like it was part of him. The sheets were cool against her bare legs. She kicked them down further.

"Why not?"

He didn't answer right away. She could hear faint noise in the background—someone's door closing down the hall, muffled voices. Then quiet again.

"Just... thinking."

"About the final?"

"Well, I guess..."

He wasn't being totally truthful. It showed, but she didn't press. It was obvious he was only humoring her. Mia almost rolled her eyes. Her stupid kid brother. She was beginning to become an expert at sensing when he was off or uncomfortable, and this was most definitely the latter.

"You going to tell me what's really keeping you up, or am I gonna have to guess...?"

He let out a small laugh, no real humor behind it.

"I think you'd probably figure it out pretty fast either way. But it doesn't matter. I'll be fine. Just stress, as I told you."

"There is something else, isn't there?"

"There is always something else, Noona. But don't worry. I can handle it."

Mia almost frowned. She rolled to her back again, fingers plucking at a loose thread on her shirt.

"How can I not? Worrying is a big part of being family."

"Right?"

"......"

Mia was frustrated by the lack of... well, response and normalcy on his end, or rather, it was frustratingly incomprehensible that she could feel there was something else beyond the reasons he gave and he didn't trust her enough to explain.

And she tried not to read into it, since really, what else could she do... but fuck did that still hurt.

She knew she should accept it, but she was really, really scared that he might, or could've started, getting bored of her. After all, who knew how the heck a younger man's mind worked, and maybe Jae-il might have already felt like his desires and wants had been fulfilled, and was simply not interested in going further than a mutual exchange of satisfaction.

If so... was there something wrong or not desirable about her body...? She knew, logically, it wasn't anything of the sort and that her worries were purely her imagination's fault.

Then her eyes snapped wide open in realization.

Could it have been Su Ah? Did that bitch do something? Did she tell him something? Or... worse.

The thought alone was enough to make Mia's blood boil, but she quickly forced the thought away and breathed, trying to calm herself.

She knew something had happened between those two, and knowing Jae-il's stance on their relationship, she was pretty sure it was Su Ah who instigated. That bitch.

But... why was Jae-il being so weird about it?

What exactly did they do?

What did they talk about?

A million questions, and none of them would be answered unless she forced them out of him. But forcing things out couldn't possibly end well.

Well, she had a faint idea as to what happened, if Su Ah's hickey was anything to go by. But she didn't think it'd leave Jae-il like this, were it the case.

And, really, the thought that it was her own sister—quiet, bookish Su Ah—who was trying to steal him from her made Mia's stomach twist.

She had tried to forget that episode. Su Ah was her sister; she couldn't possibly start a blood feud with her over their own fucking brother. But this inner rage and fear of losing him could have devastating consequences if neither of them gave in.

Mia took a breath, her tone shifting from playful to something softer.

"Jae-il... you know you can tell me anything, right? There's... nothing you could say that would make me think less of you."

"I know, Noona. When the time's right, I'll tell you. For now, I've got this."

She sighed, and the sound carried over to his line.

"Noona."

"Yeah...?"

"I miss you."

His words sent a tremor through her. Her thighs trembled. She curled her feet over the edge of the mattress, ankles pressing together.

"Mmm..." She smiled. "I miss you too, idiot."

He paused, seeming to think about how to say whatever he was planning on saying next.

"... want me to stay on the line until you're asleep...?"

The suggestion was sweet. Really, it was.

So of course, she couldn't resist giving him hell for it.

"Aw." She laughed. "My baby bro being all sweet and cute. Who are you? And what have you done to Jae-il?"

His laughter rumbled across the line.

"Cute?" He echoed, wry. "I think that's a new one."

"Nothing new." Mia rolled over. "Always had that going for you. If it wasn't the big tough boy exterior, you'd be downright adorable. Got you pegged for the cutie you've always been from the very start."

"... please stop." He groaned.

She smiled, softly. "Nevah."

"Well, what if I ask nicely...?"

"Depends on your definition of nicely, cute patootie baby bro."

Another huff. Almost like a snort, but more amused.

Mia could picture him throwing an arm across his face, smiling, eyes crinkling at the corners.

"Please, Noona, do not make fun of my rugged manly masculinity?" He intoned.

"So sorry, baby bro." Mia replied, still smiling. She was definitely not sorry about that.

And hey, at least some vitality was returning to his voice. She couldn't help but smile and laugh, until her cheeks hurt. They conversed for another half a hour.

Then...

A faint rustle. A short sigh.

"Tired...?" She asked.

"......"

He murmured something unintelligible, and then, a long beat of silence stretched on. His breathing got heavier, falling into the cadence of sleep. It hit Mia as a physical thing, how badly she wanted him beside her.

She let out a breathy huff. "Idiot, weren't you supposed to stay on call until I was asleep?"

A noncommittal murmur. He sounded practically gone already, almost nothing left of his usual sharp alertness. Not that he was that alert tonight, to begin with.

Mia smiled, heart aching.

"Thought I'd remind you one last time in case you were too lazy to hang up, which you clearly were, but forget about that." She murmured. "You are going to win the finals, Jae-Il."

"......"

"You are." She repeated, softly.

"......"

"I love you so, so much, Jae-il. I'll always be there for you, even when no one else will."

She felt so corny saying this type of shit. But it was fine as long as it was genuine, right? She simply wanted him to know.

That Noona would always be there for him.

His breathing evened out.

"......"

She smiled, huffed, and just when she thought he might be down for good, a mumbled response came back.

"Love you too, Noona..."