Chapter 59 – No Veil Between Us

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No mask remains, no lie, no hurt. I bare to you my starving heart. Feel every ache I cannot hide. The dark emotions locked inside.

Feel how I smile when you draw near. How joy itself becomes sincere. How blush and tear and whispered sigh. Can make this wretched demon fly.

I do not veil what burns in me. My love was never meant to flee. So touch the bond, and you shall see. How sweet my endless chains can be.

For now you hear each longing plea. Each foolish dream you wake in me. And if you drown within my sea. Then drown, my love… and drown with me.

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When I opened my eyes again, Lilith was already looking at me.

She was smiling. Like she had been watching the entire time and had simply been waiting for me to return to her.

Not the playful smile from before. Not the teasing one either. Just that gentle expression I had begun to understand belonged only to moments like these. The quiet ones. Her hand still rested over mine where it lay against her cheek.

Slowly, she guided my hand down between us, though she never let go.

Her fingers remained loosely intertwined with mine, her thumb tracing absentminded circles across my skin with that same impossible tenderness that I still hadn’t grown used to.

“Okay,” she murmured softly. “I won’t force you.”

The words settled over me gently.

And before I realized what I was doing, I found myself smiling. A small thing, barely there but it was real.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

The smile she gave me in return deepened slightly, and then neither of us said anything.

The silence returned.

Not awkward.

Just quiet. Comfortable the way it had been before

And without meaning to, I found myself waiting.

Waiting for her to ask.

Waited for those crimson eyes to close. Waited for the world around us to change again. Waited for her to reach into me the same way she had opened herself to me. She always had something. Some question, some observation, some piece of herself offered up to draw another piece of me out.

But this time she only continued stroking my hair and said nothing.

Eventually, I couldn’t help myself.

“Aren’t you going to see them?” I asked quietly.

Lilith hummed softly. “Hmm?”

“My memories.”

Her fingers continued their slow journey through my hair.

“Are you ready to see them?” she asked.

The question caught me off guard.

I thought about it. Properly. I let the question sit and tried to answer it honestly the way she always seemed to expect of me.

About the years I had spent avoiding them. About the pain I had buried beneath duty and prayer and anger. About the parts of myself I still couldn’t bear to touch.

And after a long moment, I gathered myself and nodded.

“Yes.”

I thought I meant it.

Lilith looked at me.

And then something shifted in her expression. Not suddenly. The change moved through her eyes first before reaching her smile, something quiet softening inside them. Her thumb stilled briefly against my hand before resuming its slow, absent circles.

Her other hand left my hair and joined the other, both of them holding mine gently between them.

“My Eliza,” she murmured.

The affection in her voice alone almost made me look away.

“You aren’t ready.”

Her thumb continued its slow journey across the back of my hand.

“I can feel you.” Her smile never left her face. “And right now…” A quiet laugh escaped her. “You don’t want to see them at all.”

I opened my mouth.

And then closed it again. Because she was right. Completely right.

I had known it the moment she said it.

The answer I had given her hadn’t come from honesty. It had come from resolve. From the same place I had spent years living from. The part of me that endured. The part that kept moving no matter what it cost. The part that had learned how to say yes to pain and call it strength.

But that wasn’t the same thing.

And somehow, she knew the difference.

Lilith’s fingers returned to my hair, her fingers threading through it with the same unhurried tenderness as before.

“So,” she said softly, amusement dancing beneath her voice. “Tell me instead.”

I blinked.

“What?”

She smiled. “Tell me about yourself.”

I stared at her.

“Why?” I asked quietly. “Wouldn’t it be easier for you to just see it yourself?” I gestured vaguely around us. At her domain, the memories that could simply unfold here as easily as dreams, the way she had already shown me hers.

Lilith laughed softly.

“There is no need anymore.” Her crimson eyes met mine. “I trust you.”

She sounded so certain.

As though there had never been any other answer.

Then that familiar spark entered her eyes again. And suddenly the corner of her lips curved in that playful way that always made my heart forget what it was doing.

“Besides…” she said, amusement crept into her voice. “I want to hear it from you.”

For some reason, warmth rushed to my face.

Lilith immediately laughed. And I immediately looked away.

Light preserve me. I stared at the scorched ground and willed it to do something useful like open up beneath me. How was I supposed to defend myself against that?

Her laughter softened. Low and fond, curling through the quiet.

I turned back a moment later—

And froze.

Somewhere between looking away and finding the courage to look back, she had moved closer.

Her crimson eyes held mine, bright and soft and entirely too amused, and before I could even think to ask what she was doing, she leaned down and pressed her lips lightly against mine.

A small kiss.

Gone almost as quickly as it came.

I stared at her.

Lilith smiled. The smile widened slightly at whatever expression I must have been making, and she brought one hand to my cheek.

“My Eliza,” she whispered, amusement dancing softly in her voice. “You are so adorable when you blush.”

I blinked.

I was aware of the warmth flooding my face. Aware that my thoughts had scattered. Aware that I should say something.

Anything. And to my complete and utter embarrassment, I could think of nothing at all.

All I could do was stare.

Then her smile softened.

And before my thoughts could recover, she leaned closer again. Slowly. Giving me time. Giving me every chance to pull away.

I didn’t.

And when her lips met mine again, I felt myself close my eyes.

Nothing frightening nor overwhelming. Just her.

I leaned into it before I even realized I was moving.

Her hand slid behind my head, gentle fingers brushing through my hair as she held me with such impossible care that my chest hurt.

I felt her smile against my lips.

Felt the quiet affection behind it and it was real. She wasn’t asking for anything. She was simply happy.

Happy.

The thought alone almost undid me.

When she finally pulled away, she stayed close enough that our foreheads nearly touched.

Her eyes lingered on mine. That same gentle smile on her lips.

Then she gave me one last soft peck.

“Whenever you’re ready,” she whispered. “I’ll listen.”

The words finally snapped something inside me back into place.

Slowly, I brought my free hand to my lips.

Warm. They were still warm.

My face burned.

I opened my mouth and closed it. Several thoughts presented themselves but none of them survived long enough to become words.

That’s when I felt it through the bond.

Tenderness.

So much Affection that it almost made my chest ache. Warm and gentle and completely unguarded.

Just happiness. Pure happiness.

She was happy.

Happy because I was here. Happy because I had blushed. Happy because I had kissed her back. Happy because I was looking at her with what was undoubtedly the expression of a woman whose thoughts had completely abandoned her.

And as that warmth flowed quietly through the thread connecting us, I realized something.

I had spent so much of my life wondering what true love was supposed to feel like.

After everything I had seen… After everything I had lost… I had started to wonder if it had ever existed at all.

And for the first time—I didn’t have to wonder anymore.