[Vol. 2 pt. 38]

It was a lonely day inside the dungeon considering that I was the only one online and there. Thera was online, but she left to do her weekly dungeon runs once I got back at the dungeon. We also already went through our scheduled appointments for the day and weren’t taking any new customers until the weekend was over, so I was alone.

It was also nice, though. As much as I appreciated spending time with everybody, even I liked to have a bit of time to myself every now and then where I didn’t have to worry about balancing how I much attention I gave to people. Of course, there were still my monsters within the dungeon, but they didn’t need attention. As realistic as they were able to act at times, they were ultimately nothing more than NPCs. They weren’t artificial intelligences or anything like that—or rather, they weren’t true AIs. The only true AI in the world worked on that other popular game, Fantasy Tales Online. According to the news, anyway.

I was personally a fan of the theory that humanity had true artificial intelligences for at least a decade or so and that the one who made it all over the news as being the “first” was really just the first public one. Were we really supposed to believe that the first true AI in history was created by a guy who wanted to use her just for making video games? Some military or secret lab probably invented one way ahead of her.

But at the same time, part of me hoped that she really was the first. There was something amusing about the first ever AI actually being created just to help out with video games.

Also, I wanted to fuck her.

How could I not want to put my dick inside the first ever artificial intelligence? She was just as real as any human and could easily make an avatar in the game for me to fuck if she was up for it.

I was almost tempted to tag her on social media inviting her to the game. Despite the fact that she had tens of millions of followers across her social media accounts, she able to sort through the hundreds of thousands of messages and notifications that she got within seconds. I didn’t have to worry about my invitation going unseen.

But at the same time, I already had a girlfriend and was about to have two of them. The idea of fucking the world’s first artificial intelligence was an amusing one, but not one I would seriously pursue.

Oh well.

Even if my monsters weren’t truly intelligent, they still did their best to pretend they were. That was more than good enough for me.

I also preferred it that way because it meant I could basically treat them like they weren’t there to focus on what I needed to do. If all my monsters actually had feelings and needs that needed satisfied, that probably would have been a bit overwhelming to me. Sure, there was some appeal to the fantasy of all my monsters having genuine personalities and lives… but sometimes, you wanted to be able to forget that some NPCs exist for a few months or years, come back to them, and then everything moves along as if you were never gone in the first place. In other words, it was nice to be lazy. As they were, my dungeon’s monsters were basically pets who didn’t actually need any care. They weren’t going to die nor hate me if I didn’t log on for a week or two while leaving them alone that whole time.

Well… actually, there was the risk of them getting killed if somebody invaded during that time.

But even then, they could respawn.

“Let’s see. Before I summon the wolves… taking a dip in the water sounds nice,” I said, eyeing the steamy water of the hot spring room.

Yeah. It was time for a dip.

I ended up relaxing in the hot spring longer than I thought I would. Spending time in there, on my own, just relaxing, was nice. I never really got to enjoy it on its own before. Usually, there was somebody else in there for me to pay attention to. I’d be cuddling with Lily, talking to Thera, giving somebody a massage—that sort of stuff. Despite being in the hot spring itself, it was typically used as a site for me to enjoy somebody else rather than to enjoy it on its own.

“I really haven’t taken much time for myself lately, have I?” I asked myself, looking up at the ceiling. Only my head was sticking out from the water at that point as the rest of me was submerged beneath the surface. “Maybe I should take myself out to see a movie and grab dinner. That sounds nice.”

Even in the modern year, there are still people who think it’s silly or strange for others to go out to movies or to restaurants on their own.

What do I say to that?

Fuck that.

Self-care is extremely important. People shouldn’t be shamed for taking themselves out to go and do things like that. It’s nice to get away from people sometimes, plus it lets you be entirely selfish. You don’t have to try and compromise on what movie you watch, where you go to eat, at what time—none of that. It’s a date that revolves entirely around treating yourself. Even if it’s something like going to an amusement park on your own, go for it, I say!

Maybe that was what I’d do?

“Actually, wait,” I said before pulling up the in-game web browser.

There was a traditional festival in my area a few weeks from then. My mom always hated that sort of stuff since she couldn’t stand the smell of fried food and animals, since the festival was a very rustic ordeal, so I could go to it without feeling guilty about leaving her behind.

I usually took my sister to it while she was growing up, but she was off at college and had a boyfriend, so I was in the clear to go without any guilt.

The plan was coming together.

I’d start the day off by taking myself out for brunch. Then I’d hit up the festival to watch some entertainment, pet some animals, and eat food that would probably take a couple of years off my life. After that was over, I’d go out to see a movie. And after the movie ended, I’d go and get some ice cream at the little ice cream shop near the lake. Enjoy some ice cream while watching the moon reflect on the lake’s water.

A sigh left my lips as I remembered how narcissistic I could get. “Yeah. I’d fuck me after a date like that. Guess I’ll add edging and jacking off all night to finish the date up.”

Was I just supposed to not fuck myself after a date like that?

Now, I’d never expect anybody else to reward me with sex after dedicating an entire day to them or anything like that. That would be wrong. But me? I could absolutely expect to be rewarded with sex from myself after taking myself out on a date.

Maybe I’d even dress up. Buy some new clothes. Get a pedicure.

Thinking of pedicures, my thoughts drifted over to all of the comments and messages I got from men who tried out a pedicure for the first time after I made a video suggesting that they should. That video opened up a whole new world to many men.

I wanted all my male viewers to be treated like the kings they deserved to be treated like, after all, and kings needed pedicures. Manicures were also nice, but pedicures were superior as far as I was concerned.

Another sigh left my lips when I realized what I was doing.

“Seriously, Damian? All you have to do is summon a wolf and you’re procrastinating from that?” I asked myself.

Then again, was I really procrastinating or was I just relaxing?

I couldn’t even tell. Was it guilt setting in from not doing something when I had the time and energy to be doing it, or was I actually procrastinating? It wouldn’t have been the first time where an unhealthy mindset struck me of, “If I’m not constantly working toward something or giving somebody attention then I’m wasting my time and being a lazy piece of shit.”

Would I really even enjoy something like taking myself out on a date? As much as I always told everybody else to do things like that to take care of themselves… I never did. I always felt guilty and lazy if I tried to spend time treating myself instead of working on the countless things that needed working on. The more I spoiled myself, the worse I felt.

“What a hypocrite I am,” I said and sighed.

Now that I felt guilty about thinking taking myself out on a date and for spending all that time in the hot spring, I reequipped my gear, stretched, and opened up the dungeon menu. There were more than enough dungeon points gained via passive generation, killing invading players with Thera’s help, and fucking other players. Most of my monsters were actually at a pretty good level at that point. They were all in their thirties which, while still nowhere near good enough to defend against any endgame players, would keep the dungeon safe against more casual threats.

That wasn’t all, either. Next to the goblins on the roster was a message that read, “Evolution Available.”

Clicking the button opened up a new screen for me. It listed the requirements for the evolution and what they could evolve into: hobgoblins. In this game, hobgoblins were basically just bigger goblins with hunched backs and even bumpier skin. Their cocks were bumpier, too.

As for the requirements, it seemed like the main requirement for unlocking the evolution was them reaching level twenty-five. There was an unfilled requirement under that, though, which demanded I get a few different items related to hobgoblins and alchemy if I wanted to evolve them. These items included: either five vials of hobgoblin blood or hobgoblin semen, a soul gem containing a hobgoblin’s soul, and a potion of enhanced growth.

They were all items that could easily be acquired from the market board. Well, maybe not the soul gem.

In the game, the Soul Enchanter was a subclass of the crafting class, Enchanter. Soul Enchanters created special games aptly named “Soul Gems” and used these gems to capture the souls of monsters they killed. These gems could then be applied to weapons and armor to give them special bonuses which depended on the monster contained within the gem. A monster known for lightning attacks, for example, could imbue a weapon with lightning to electrocute foes or imbue armor with speed-enhancing stats.

The soul of a hobgoblin would probably just give a tiny boost to strength easily outclassed by the souls of stronger monsters. It was the kind of thing players would only care about if they were leveling up Soul Enchanter while leveling up their main combat class while wanting to get the absolute most out of every level… which was a waste of time since gear was constantly being replaced while leveling. So, I doubted I was going to find any of those on the market board.

Another thing for my to-do list, then.

Backing out of the evolution window, I went to the screen that allowed me to summon new monsters and summoned a single wolf.

The wolf materialized out of thin air in front of me, immediately sitting down and looking up at me with a wagging tail. Despite having the equipment that made it obvious he was a male, it was even less usable than a neutered dog’s. A player wouldn’t even be allowed to touch it if they tried to. An invisible barrier would prevent them from doing so.

The game went to great lengths to prevent anything that could be considered bestiality from happening. The developers didn’t want to get into any legal trouble over that.

“Alright. Welcome to the dungeon,” I said and reached down to pet him between his ears. The private part of his body might not have been touchable, but the rest of his fluffy self was. That meant I could pet him as much as I wanted to.

And he was so soft.

He also looked different than the wolf I actually tamed and converted. The color patterns must have been randomized upon summoning when it come to monsters that actually had some variety to how they could look.

The wolf sitting before me with his tongue out as I petted him had a thick coat of pitch-black fur. I never saw any sort of animal before with hair as pure black as his was. Then, in contrast to the darkness of his fur, he had two, shining eyes light blue in color which were incredibly beautiful.

“I’m going to pamper the heck out of you,” I told him.

He replied by barking at me.

“Alright, I’ve come up with a name for you. I think it’s pretty fitting. From now on, you shall be named Shadow!” It was generic, but there wasn’t a name more fitting for him in all of existence.

Shadow barked and pressed his head up against my hand. He may have been a wolf, and just an NPC, but he still acted like an actual dog would. Well, aside from needing to fed, given shots, taken outside, and all that. Having an NPC dog was honestly better than having a real dog as far as I was concerned, but that was mainly due to me not wanting even more obligations.

I already had enough of those.

“Now to give you a pack,” I said and then summoned him another nine wolves.

And… somehow…

Despite it being purely random…

Every single one of new wolves was female.

I could only stand there and blink a few times as Shadow was swarmed by them rubbing up against him in a very catlike manner, each one trying to get his attention after just seconds of knowing him.

I imagined that Shadow felt one of two ways. He either felt incredibly lucky or he was about to beg me for help.

“Good luck,” I told him as he stared up at me with an unmoving expression. “Well, that’s another of my to-do list to check off. Now to assign them… wait.”

As it turned out, each room or hall had a point limit of sorts. This prevented me from placing all of the wolves in a single room. I was only allowed to place three of them in the entrance, four in the café room, two with the goblins, and then the last one had to go hang out with Al Capra.

“Must be to prevent somebody from stacking every single possible dungeon they have at the entrance,” I said.

That made sense. Having literally every monster available at the very entrance to a dungeon wouldn’t exactly be fun for anybody wanting to attack it. It also seemed like the deeper into the dungeon I went, the higher the point limit was. So, it encouraged keeping the powerful and numerous monsters near the back. In addition to that, the first areas had a maximum of five monsters allowed to be assigned there while the back had ten. There was a limit on how many monsters could be in an area even if they all fit within the point limit.

My most powerful, non-boss monsters, being GD and my tyrant rex, weren’t even allowed to come near the entrance of the dungeon since their point values were higher than what the first areas allowed.

“I like how this is balanced… but that also sucks,” I said. “Well, can’t blame the devs for trying to balance this. Sorry, Shadow. Your harem is gonna get split up.”

Shadow almost looked relieved as his harem members were split up to give him some space.