[Vol. 4 pt. 9]

“I… I feel… like I’ve done something… with my ears… that is not their intended use,” Meadow said, still recovering on the ground from the amount of times she came from me playing with her ears. At that point, she was on her back still but using my lap as her pillow. She tried to stand, but her legs immediately gave out because of all the pleasure.

As for me, as much as I had fun with her ears, I couldn’t help but to look at her thighs and say, “I want to fuck your thighs with a monster. Preferably the kind that mounts a woman to hump her.”

“I… would not be opposed to that, but… perhaps… if you do, then… it could use… my ears during it?”

“Some kind of monster that mounts you from behind, fucks you like a dog, and uses its mouth on your ears while doing so. I’ll have to find an appropriate one to use for that since I can’t just use an actual wolf or dog.”

“Is that… a problem?”

“I mean, I get why I can’t. But ultimately, it’s something that’s always going to annoy me. I can gangbang a girl with goblins. I can fuck a girl as an extinct t-rex. Players can opt into getting raped by monsters, beasts, plants, demons, and more. But can you fuck a wolf? Can you let a wolf knot inside of you? Can you suck off a horse? No. Because all of those are somehow too unethical.”

“But… does it matter? Do you not have enough options as is?”

“Well, not really, and I do. There is already more than enough variety for me to go through, and it’s not the end of the world that I don’t get to take over a wolf or horse’s body for some fun. But here’s the thing. Seeing as how they’re grounded in reality, they’re just… more meaningful. Us humans are naturally more attached to them because they exist, so they are more meaningful, and, most importantly, canine and equine cocks look way more interesting than human or humanoid dicks. Almost every single penis in this game looks like a human’s, a generic tentacle without much in the way of interesting textures, or just… random like an alien’s cock. There’s not really anything that gets close to being like a dog’s or horse’s.”

“Well, perhaps it is because those are more meaningful to humans? That is why they are not permitted?”

“Kind of. But the main issue is that, even in the modern day and age, people still believe that allowing such content in mainstream games would be ‘encouraging harm against their real-world counterparts.’ Because dogs and horses exist, it encourages harm against them if you let one fuck you in a virtual world. Because goblins and tentacle monsters don’t exist, you can’t encourage harm against them by fucking them.”

“Oh. I see. But… you are permitted to kill one another in this world. Is humans killing other humans not encouraging violence against humans in your original world?”

“You’re the best, Meadow. That’s something I bring up all the time. But, the logic is that violence is a natural part of our history that is never really actively encouraged even if gamified, whereas something like getting fucked by an animal is not a natural part of our history, and allowing it is fetishizing it which is more or less the same as encouraging it in the eyes of many. These people typically can’t separate fiction from reality. And, because they can’t separate fiction from reality, they assume that others can’t, either, which means that anybody who wants to get knotted by a dog in an online game must want to sexually abuse a dog in real life, too. Now… if I’m being perfectly fair, there absolutely are some people who get off to those sorts of things in real life, and virtual experiences can validate their predatory beliefs. But I don’t mean to get too into this rant since I always do.”

“Hmm… I see. I had no idea that there were so many ways to approach an issue such as that. I am not entirely sure what to believe for myself. Even if I am essentially mimicking the appearance and behavior of a human… I must admit that I struggle to properly relate to one. Had it not been for hearing the discussions of others, I would have assumed that the casual murdering of one another was a normal part of your world! Because why would so many humans opt into partaking in such activities here if not because they regularly do so already? But I suppose there is a flaw with that logic. Why would they do it in this world if they already do it frequently in their original world?”

I had to clear my mind for a second there so that I could properly focus on what she just said. “Hold on. So, you believe—or believed, that we’re all going around killing each other and openly having sex in the real world as much as we have here?”

Meadow nodded before her expression switched to one with a frown. “Is… that bad?”

“I don’t think I can say that it’s bad, but it’s… definitely wrong.” I had to remember that she was, supposedly, an artificial intelligence who had no access to anything outside of the game’s world. She had no access to the internet at large, no access to external programs—nothing. Everything she knew came from the world we were in. In that case, if somebody was born in a world where violence and sex was in every single direction, and she was aware that we made the game to be like such on purpose… then it was probably natural for her to believe that we were living lives just as hedonistic in our own world. “Our world… is way more boring. And safer, for that matter.”

“I gathered as much, but I am still not sure which activities are shared between our worlds and which are not.”

“Imagine the daily life of a normal farmer NPC here, but replace the farm with a small apartment, advanced technology to make life more convenient, and a digital screen that he sits in front of all day instead of working in the field. That’s average for us. Oh, and he never realistically has to worry about being randomly killed by anybody, there are no monsters, he has to use the bathroom on a regular basis as well as eat and drink to survive, sleep for a recommended eight hours per day, and will be lucky if he gets laid even once a month.”

“That… that sounds horrible.”

“And that’s why people escape to games—worlds like this instead, to escape the safe monotony of reality and have fun here instead. You know, some guy in an important position in his company, living a life full of stress day after day, might just want to go home, come here where he plays a cute girl, and get fucked by monsters who are absolutely out of his control. All he has to do is relax and let others make him feel good instead of having to worry about anything. Or maybe somebody working with people all day had a few unruly customers and just wants to vent all of their negative emotions out, so they come here to kill everybody they see. I would personally recommend something less violent for them, but what ultimately matters is that they’re taking care of themselves mentally, and that’s one method of it.”

“I see! That makes sense.”

“By the way, while we’re on the topic of this whole thing… in your eyes, is there a difference between players like me and NPCs?” Talking about the differences between our worlds made me curious. I wanted to know what her opinion on the NPCs was. Were they just as real as somebody like me? Was there a clear difference between us? Did she view one was fake and the other as real? I was curious. Though, I kind of regretted asking it as soon as I did. If it turned out that she saw NPCs the same way that she saw somebody like me, I was probably going to feel guilty about killing hostile monsters and whatnot. Then again, if she did see us as the same, she probably didn’t care seeing as how she was already under the assumption that both worlds were just naturally violent at one point. Well, unrealistically violent.

“Totally different!” Meadow answered, letting me sigh from relief. “I suppose, with the NPCs, they are all—well, scripted. I can read every line of code behind them. They all act in extremely standard ways without any true independence, including the monsters within your dungeon. They have many different options and some degree of ‘smart’ learning for holding conversations, but are ultimately limited and incapable of truly learning. Not to mention that they always have to live the same lives. A farmer, since you used one as an example earlier, always walks through his fields at the exact same intervals, following the same patterns, returns home to eat the same thing, and then treats every single repetition of this cycle as if it were the first time he has ever done it. Even to somebody who has only ever known this world, it is clear that they are merely meant to be imitations of somebody else.”

“Huh. I mean, that’s understandable, but I didn’t really expect that at the same time. How do we look to you?”

“Mysterious! With the NPCs, I understand everything they do and why from the start to end of their logic, and they constantly exist within this world even when they die and have to respawn. But you—the players, I only see the results of your actions rather than the why of them. You send commands to your avatars, but I never know why you do what you do. Even when it comes to reading some of your thoughts, that is only possible when you are making a conscious effort to clearly think about something. Otherwise, your thoughts are indecipherable.”

That was relieving to hear.

“Oh, and you only exist for as long as you are within your avatar. Even your avatar disappears from my perception of the world once you leave. I have no idea where it goes. So, as far as I am concerned, you are all enigmatic beings, and this entire world and all of its inhabitants have been made for the purpose of your entertainment.”

I wasn’t sure how to feel about that, but I did want to know how she felt about it. “How does that make you feel? I mean, being stuck in a world that was made for the entertainment of the people who created it and exist in a completely different world?”

Meadow tapped a finger against her chin a few times before smiling up at me and saying, “I like it! It makes me feel like I have a clear purpose: your entertainment! Also, things that may be considered ‘bad’ are only ever temporary here. In your world, from what I have gathered, if somebody dies… they never come back. And things done without a person’s consent are generally not appreciated. I have also observed how when some players first return to their avatars, they look tired, upset, or even depressed. But by the time they are done playing, they look happy and content! Sometimes mad, but almost always better than how they started. The same applies to you as well! There have been numerous times where you came into this world looking tired and then left with a smile on your face! So, even if this world is not exactly ‘real’ by your standards, the effect that it has on everybody is very much real, and that is important to me!”

“You don’t have to be ‘real’ in the same way as me to still be real in your own way. You know, a lot of humans think in a way similar to that. They believe that their purpose is to leave an impact on people. As long as they’ve left an impact, they’ve done something important with their lives.”

“That is exactly how I see it! Also, I do take a bit of extra pride in knowing that I, a ‘fake’ or impersonation of a real human being, am still able to make the real deal feel better!”

“You’re too pure for the real world anyways,” I said, petting her head. We were still in the same position that we started the conversation in: me sitting on the ground with her using my lap as a pillow as she lay on her back.

“I—I am not sure you can say that after what you have done to my ear,” Meadow replied, her cheeks now blushing again as she turned her head to look away. Only, due to how long her ears were, she couldn’t easily turn her head while on my lap. She had to settle for simply averting her eyes.

“That’s a good point. Alright, you’re officially too corrupted to ever come into contact with the real world.”

“I—I am not that corrupted!”

“Want me to fuck your ear again sometime?”

Her ears twitched and she tried to look away again. “Maybe… I am that corrupted…”

“We can do it later. For now, how about we get you going with your first quests?”

Meadow nodded and sat up. She then immediately returned her head to my lap.

“Something wrong?” I asked.

“I missed the comfort of your lap,” she answered.

“That quickly?”

“Yes.”

“Sounds like you’re addicted. Want to stay here for a few more minutes then?”

“Yes, please.”