Taming a god

There I was, listening to the ramblings of a mysterious snake made of black smoke inside a shrine in the morning...

<"I see that you desire power, which I can offer you.">

As you can imagine, I was terrified! The freezing presence of that shadow made my skin crawl and turned the air heavy in my lungs.

"...."

BUT I COULDN'T LET THAT THING NOTICE MY STATE! If I showed even a single crack of weakness, I feared that manifestation would take the chance to devour my consciousness or claim absolute control.

"For... real?"

So, with all my strength, I put on the best poker face I could muster, gritting my teeth on the inside and hoping it would work to hide the turmoil in my chest.

After all, if what it said was true and it actually possessed a legitimate way to grant me the strength required to survive the dangers of this environment, I would have been more than willing to kiss this suspicious snake!

<"Indeed.">

BUT, like a fool, I had forgotten for a moment...

<"The only thing you have to do is subjugate many women and make them your concubines to become stronger.">

... That this world... in its essence... was...

"...."

A DEPRESSING EROTIC WORLD!!

<"And become the one who reigns over all!">

The words echoed through the spiritual space, abruptly dragging me back to the harsh reality of my situation.

"..."

The dark mist expanded with an air of absolute grandeur, completely oblivious to the abyss of irritation opening up inside my head.

<"Are you ready to...—">

Subjugate women? Concubines? In a reality crawling with monstrosities, inexplicable threats, and organizations that could eradicate us in the blink of an eye?

(Smack!)

Faced with such sheer stupidity, I did what any sane person would do (definitely not).

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FREAKIN' MIND?!"

Throwing my hand up, I tossed everything out the window, landing a direct slap.

<"W-What...?">

As a result, the black smoke temporarily dispersed from the force of the strike before frantically trying to reassemble in midair, thoroughly disoriented and shaken by the assault.

"Do you have any idea how many organizations, monsters, and anomalous phenomena exist in this damn world?!"

Ignoring all of that, my voice boomed through the mental chamber, unleashing all the built-up rage and disbelief.

<"Mortal, how...?>

(SLAP!!)

A second impact echoed violently, sending the remnants of the shadow crashing straight into the ground.

"SHUT UP AND SIT PROPERLY!"

<"Yes! Yes!">

Just like that, I completely forgot about myself, spending the next 3 hours giving it an uninterrupted lecture.