Chapter 17: Bound or Not

My ear grew back. The process took a couple of days and itched like hell, though. Was it strange to be a demon using ‘hell’ in the same sort of way I did as a human? Well, I’d never been to hell, so I didn’t think so. And no one was going to judge my thoughts, I hoped, so I didn’t need to care.

Bailing was boring work, but at least Elnie kept away from me. According to the crew, we were drawing close to Ivlaet, which was good because the seas had gotten a lot rougher of late and I was glad for the patchwork that’d been done to the hull.

Seyari was still teaching me Turquoiser and Cavenish, the former of which I was picking up exceptionally quickly thanks to the whole crew speaking it. Nelys was learning Ordian from the both of us, while Seyari taught us both what she knew of Navvish.

Turns out I finally found a language the mysterious woman wasn’t fluent in. Aside from basic phrases, she kept conflicting herself on the complex conjugations present in the language and eventually admitted she knew it only in passing.

Unfortunately, I hadn’t yet gotten an answer on whether Seyari would bind me or I’d be stuck in a human shaped sack for who knows how many weeks. Aside from brushing it off or stopping the conversation when I brought it up, we all got along well enough.

Perhaps too well regarding Nelys. They were part of the Lady of Liseu’s crew and wouldn’t be joining us, which was something I could tell was eating at them. Especially after Aarsh’s death, the crew needed the small bundle of energy up in the rigging.

Though I hadn’t known the kazzel closely, the moment of Aarsh’s deathblow was seared into my memory. I’ve had at least one nightmare involving that scene. I’m certain Nelys had been affected as well, but they didn’t show it and I wasn’t sure how to approach them to even ask. Seyari had been closer to Aarsh, but aside from a brief moment when we had given him and the others their final rites, I’d seen no emotion from her.

I swapped out my shift for the day and walked back to our cabin with a piece of hardtack, some jerky, and a dried fruit I couldn’t identify but had enjoyed the whole trip. I missed durians.

Seyari was waiting for me in our room, alone. This time, I’d managed to avoid announcing my presence by knocking with my horns. I willed myself to ignore the twin indents above the door.

“Do they have durians in Navanaea?” I asked, sitting down on the floor to eat.

“In the northern jungle they do. Once you get past the hills to the south and up onto the inner plateau, it’s all desert.”

“Will we have to cross the desert to get to Liseu then?” I held my food in two hands and fished around in my battered suitcase for a flask of water with the others.

“Unless we can get a ship. If you’re openly a demon, that won’t be an option.” Seyari watched my arms. “You really are used to those, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, they grew on me.” I gave a lopsided smile.

“Really?” Seyari’s voice rose. “How the fuck are you this calm? You should be scared. Angry! Frustrated!”

“I’m a demon,” I replied simply. “Most people want me dead and everyone else wants to use me.”

“Like me.”

“Yeah, like you.”

Seyari glared at me, but there was no anger behind it that I could feel. “I don’t think Nelys fits either group.”

I looked up with a mouth full of dry hardtack, half expecting them to appear in the room after being mentioned. “Point taken.”

I took a swig of water and swallowed.

“You’re incorrigible,” Seyari sighed.

“Yep. Want to bind me?”

“Not sure.”

“Are you sure?”

“Just said I wasn’t.”

I pouted.

Seyari gave me a look. “I can’t believe you’re a demon.”

“Where’s this coming from?”

“Nowhere, I guess. It’s just that you’re so damn agreeable all the time.”

“I ripped a guy in half last week, you know.”

“Yeah, and you apparently gave Elnie her anger back and were fine losing an ear for the favor.”

“It grew back!” I replied indignantly.

“That’s not—ugh!” Seyari threw her hands up. “You know she was nicer before you ‘fixed’ her.”

“I allowed her to feel her full anger again, so it makes sense. I’ve no right to control someone’s emotions, you know.” I wagged a claw at her.

“I guess? Probably good you think like that,” Seyari replied. “Do you feel anything at all for the pirates you killed?”

“Weren’t they privateers?”

“Trust me; there’s no difference.”

“Oh,” I paused to think back. “I had to kill them or they’d kill people I cared about. I guess I’m a little concerned I don’t feel worse about the whole thing.”

“Huh. Yeah, that’s not too normal a reaction to killing other people. Probably has to do with being a demon.”

“So, it’s a bad thing?”

“No. Actually, I’m glad I don’t have to worry about you freaking out over killing people when there’s no easy way out.”

“Good?” I paused to think for a few moments. “I didn’t feel any power from those who died either, so I’m certain I’m not a Reaver at least.”

“I believe you. Reavers normally go after mages due to higher mana density in their souls, but you didn’t target either one. Instead, you helped make sure the crew survived being boarded.”

I felt a bit of pride inside at Seyari’s compliment. I may not feel sick or have nightmares over who I killed, but I’d make sure to never lose that part of myself.

“Hey Seyari?” I asked. “Have you met a Reaver?”

“…Yes.”

Seyari’s reply shocked me enough to break the flow of our conversation. “What happened?”

“I killed her.”

A bit of fear rose up from the tip of my tail when she said those words.

The conversation died right there. I finished eating in silence. Nelys came in a few minutes later and dragged both of us into language lessons. Soon, I was chatting and laughing with two people I called friends, but I had a lot of new questions for Seyari to add to the big pile of older ones. Someday I’d get answers, I hoped.

That night, I looked at Seyari’s aura as she lay in the hammock above me. The act was probably an invasion of privacy, but curiosity got the better of me. Green, specifically a hue that looked like someone had taken a lime and washed the brightness out of it. Her aura was perhaps a touch weaker than mine, which I thought odd for a moment until I remembered the extensive training she probably had compared me.

Nothing unusual though. I think. Not like I would know what to look for.

***

The next day was the last before we reached Ivlaet. In the evening, my two roommates and I were in our cabin for one last night of language lessons.

“How did you end up with the Lady of Liseu’s crew anyway?” I asked Seyari. “You’re clearly an accomplished mage. Shouldn’t you and Elnie have more prestigious options?”

“Hey! The Lady of Liseu has the most…prestigious pirate crew on Varra!” Nelys hitched on the unfamiliar word in Ordian, but powered through it admirably.

“I suppose that’s true.” I looked toward Seyari who furrowed her brow.

“I joined, well, Captain Torrez took me in when no one else would,” Seyari answered hesitantly.

“Why would no one take you in?” I asked.

The silver-eyed woman looked back at me, then to Nelys. “I was wanted for treason and murder against the Church of Dhias.”

“Treason?” Nelys asked.

Seyari repeated the word in Turquoiser and Nelys nodded before they replied, “That doesn’t seem so bad! Except the murder I guess, but it depends.”

“I assume you were guilty?” I asked.

“Very.”

“Did the person deserve it?”

“Most of them did.”

“Oh,” both Nelys and I spoke.

“Why treason though?” I asked.

“That’s not something I’m willing to talk about.” Seyari’s face grew stern. “Maybe someday, but even Torrez doesn’t know much more than I’ve told you.

“How long were you around?” Nelys asked. “People mentioned you sometimes but wouldn’t tell me much.”

“A few years,” Seyari shrugged.

“How old are you anyway?” I looked at her face, but I couldn’t place her much above thirty.

“Thirty-three.” Her answer came after some hesitation.

“What about ‘it’s not polite to ask a woman her age?’” I joked.

“Don’t give a shit about that,” Seyari smiled.

“What about Elnie?” Nelys asked. “Why’d she join?”

“She’s a high noble from Aloria who murdered her fiancée,” Seyari replied without hesitation. “Afraid I don’t know more than that. She saw me as a rival pretty quickly and we never got along after that.”

“Aloria? The Elven queendom?” I vaguely recalled the name from old stories.

“The one and only.”

“Aren’t they matriarchal?”

“Yeah, but it doesn’t excuse killing your husband-to-be.”

“True,” I paused for a moment. “What about leaving the crew. Why did you?”

“Oh! Oh! I know this one!” Nelys vibrated. “The crew raided some weird Ordian ship and then Seyari got really weird and left at the next port.”

“Did it have something to do with my symbol?” I pulled the front of my shirt down to reveal it.

“Yeah, it did. I don’t think it’s just your symbol either. Though I don’t know about the gem.”

“Who else has it?” I asked cautiously.

“What else has it?” Nelys asked excitedly.

“I wish I knew,” Seyari replied.

“I want to know too. Hopefully we can find out.”

“Me too! Seyari’s gem is pretty and the pattern is nice!” Nelys was excited.

Seyari looked at Nelys and seemed unsure how to respond.

“Nelys, dear, you know Captain Torrez has already said none of the crew are to follow us,” I said as kindly as I could with a soft smile.

“Oh, right.” Nelys’ face fell. “Good luck then! And come back some day!”

“Thanks, Nelys,” I replied. “You too. And stay safe.”

I didn’t approve of them being a part of a pirate crew, but so far as anyone knew, they were an adult. Torrez certainly thought so, and the crew treated them well enough. Even Elnie was relatively cordial to the energetic person.

“But we’re not saying goodbye yet!” Nelys smiled in triumph. “We have most of a whole day!”

“You’re right.” Seyari finally found her words. “Oh, and Renna, you’ll need to stay on the ship a bit tomorrow while I get the binding supplies. I already cleared it with Torrez.”

Seyari said it so casually the statement took a moment to sink in. “Really? Thank you! Feels weird to be thanking someone for binding me and all, but it really is what I want. At least to try it.”

“And we’re going to try it first. I’ll be picking up spare materials and we’ll make an initial bind that’s easy to try to break and see what it does to your mental state. If the contract forces you to feel loyal regardless of the conditions of the agreement, then I won’t do it.”

“That’s fair.”

“I wanna watch!”

“No.” Seyari shook her head. “I don’t have enough experience to know what might go wrong.”

Nelys looked to me.

“Sorry Nelys, but I agree with Seyari here. I’ll be sure to say goodbye after so you can see the collar and brand.” I tried to let them down gently.

Nelys thought about it for a long moment. “…Kay.”

“Thanks for being understanding.” I ruffled their hair and they smiled.

“We should also be able to get proper clothes for you in Ivlaet, Renna.” Seyari smiled at me.

“Sounds good! Oh, and you can call me Zarenna. I said Renna when we first met because I thought ‘Zarenna’ sounded too demon-ey.”

“Too ‘demon-ey’? Pfft, okay,” Seyari laughed.

We spent the rest of the night trading stories. Most of them were the exploits of the Lady of Liseu from Nelys and Seyari, but I snuck in a few from my childhood, with a lot of the details scrubbed out. I felt bad hiding my past like that, but I wasn’t sure how to explain everything.

Mid-morning, we reached Ivlaet and sailed into the harbor. I had no view from the bilge since the hole was mostly patched. The sounds of a busy harbor did manage to filter through. Along with a lot of chatter from the crew.

Despite the other ship having had precious little loot, this was a big haul, and a potentially a big nightmare for the crew since the rogues had flown a privateer flag.

Seyari had gone ashore as soon as possible to get the supplies for the binding, which left me to practice my Turquoiser by myself. Despite only having a week or two, I felt confident in basic conversation. My literacy was weak, but so long as no one was too pedantic when they talked, I should be able to understand them.

Nelys was somewhere else helping to get both ships docked. The Lady of Liseu would need to go into drydock, but for now I was stuck making sure the patches held and we didn’t sink at the dock.

“Hey, uh, Zarenna was it?” I turned to see a crewmember, a dark-haired human man who looked Turquoiser, sticking his head into the bilge from the top of the exit hatch.

“Yeah?”

“Seyari’s back and wants to see you. Captain said you’re done bailing.”

“Oh, great! Thanks!” I turned and smiled.

He recoiled and pulled his head back up quickly.

Probably shouldn’t show teeth.

Back in our room, the place had been cleared out. My suitcase was outside next to Seyari’s pack. Nelys’ pile was gone entirely.

Seyari beckoned me inside. I remembered to duck in time and closed the door behind me.

“So, how do we do this?”

“You’ll stand in the ritual circle here.” Seyari pointed to a large rune laid on the floor with some sort of silvery chalk. “We’ll make a verbal contract and then you place a drop of your own blood at the edge of the circle. I’ll do the same on the inside of the collar.”

“Then I put on the collar?”

“I hand it to you and you put it on, yes.”

“Did you get one that looks nice at least?”

“I didn’t want to.”

“But you did! Can I see it?”

“Sure, but if you make one comment about me buying you a fancy collar, I’m editing in a stipulation preventing wordplay.”

I blushed deep crimson. With everything going on, I hadn’t stopped to consider sexuality since I got my dress. I couldn’t deny I felt Seyari was attractive, but, well, neither of us were in the place to really consider that sort of thing. Plus, I had no idea if she’d feel anything for a demon anyway.

My pause was long enough that Seyari had her own slight blush and I realized I’d been staring. “Uh, thanks.”

Smooth as gravel. Regardless, I took the collar and looked it over. The piece was silvery-gold and weighty enough to make me wonder if it was solid metal.

“It’s electrum. I realized that a greater demon like you would be suspicious with a cheap binding collar.”

Oh. “That makes sense…”

“Plus, electrum handles magic better than iron would, so it hints at a detailed contract.”

“How do demons normally agree to this sort of thing?” I asked a question I realized I’d never put much thought into.

“They don’t. Typically, they’re captured and forced into it. Sometimes, particularly with greater demons, the binder bargains a piece of their soul upon their death.”

“Oh.”

“Still want to do this? I realize I might not have been abundantly clear. In Navanaea and bound like this, you will be seen as my property.”

“So long as you don’t treat me any different when you don’t have to, I’m fine with that.”

“Figured you’d say as much. I just have a couple more things to go over.”

“Sure thing.” I handed the collar back to Seyari. “This doesn’t hurt, does it?”

“No idea.”

“Great.”

Seyari just shrugged and handed me a robust-looking needle. “Prick your finger with this, and place the blood where I’m pointing. When I hand you the collar, place the half with my blood in front of you and the other half in the back. They clasp together.”

Seyari twisted the collar and it unlocked neatly into two segments.

“Ready, Zarenna?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Good! Now remember this first contract’s a test, so try to disobey and say ‘bilge’ once the contract’s made. Also, try to shake hands diagonally across with yourself.”

“You missed an opportunity to make me do something embarrassing.”

Seyari’s smile fell. “No, I didn’t.”

“Sorry.”

The focus required for the ritual did a lot to dispel the awkwardness of my joke. The contract was completely basic and had no conditions at all aside from the test ones. Once we verbally agreed, I pricked a finger on one of my lower hands, which took a good bit of force, and placed my drop of blood at the front of the rune on the floor.

Seyari pricked her own finger and handed the collar to me in two pieces which I took in my upper hands. I carefully positioned the cold halves of a ring before clasping them together. I didn’t try to resist the tug on my mana.

Instantly, magic tinged with my own crimson, Seyari’s muted green, and a swirl of blindingly bright white flared around me. The collar heated up. Below me, the dust of the rune shimmered and flowed up, carried by the magic. The color of the powder darkened, and it poured onto my left cheek, burning into a sigil of the same symbol drawn on the floor.

Within moments, the room looked completely normal again. The collar now felt cool around my neck. I felt a wave of tiredness and realized the binding had pulled a good chunk of my mana reserves to do its thing.

I felt the mark on my cheek. There was a magic affecting me like a low hum in the background. A faint sort of tug in the direction of Seyari was all I could really tell.

Seyari recovered first. “When you’re ready, tell me what you’ve been bailing out the past few days.”

I formed the reply in my head. That came easily, but trying to say it felt heavy. I took a deep breath.

“I’ve been bailing out the bilge.”

There was a flash of light from the symbol on my cheek. The collar felt looser around my neck.

Seyari blinked. “Did you just…?”

The tug and low hum of the contract was gone.

“I think so?”

“That’s not…what even are you?”

“Trust me, I’d like to know.”

“Well, do you know anything else about yourself? Any strange abilities, feelings, instincts, anything?”

“I have aura sight?”

“Haven’t heard of a greater demon that didn’t.”

I immediately thought about my Name. Zerix’Arranthariel. Even saying it in my thoughts rang with weight. I didn’t want to say it out loud. While I’d won out over my demonic anger during the time on my island, every part of me felt giving away my Name to be a bad idea.

“I have a Name.”

“What?”

“Not my name, but my Name. Is that normal?”

“Oh. Ooooooh. Well fuck, that explains a lot.”

“A lot of what?”

“A True Name. Something granted to powerful demons and celestials. Thing is it’s granted. Like a title, but unique? I don’t know much more other than invoking one is powerful for both the holder themselves, but also anyone trying to defeat them.”

“Defeat them how? Did you ever use one?”

“Not quite sure how, but I think it has something to do with compulsion. Some sort of honor system for outer beings. I never used one, but I heard one once and know another. And no, I’m not talking about that right now.”

“Okay, that’s both awesome and worrying. But I assume it doesn’t have anything to do with why I broke the contract?”

“No. And you didn’t break it. That’s the part I can’t explain. If you broke it, the collar’d be a wreck. It’s like you just nullified it or something.” Seyari thought a moment and then continued. “Do you know how you got a True Name?”

“Oh yeah, that happened when I touched the statue in the cathedral on my island. The gem the idol had moved to my symbol.”

“That’s super fucking important! You probably inherited your True Name from the volcano demon! Never heard of the gemstone thing, though. Plus, I’ve seen similar sigils and yours, even without the gemstone, is different. Normally, the symbol’s just the vortex. No six-pointed starburst and no other patterns I can’t identify.”

“Do you know what the vortex means?”

“That’s what I want to find out. I’ve only seen it on greater demons, though. Not sure why.”

“So, you went with the expedition to find out more about my sigil’s differences, then?”

“Yep.”

“Think that’s why I was able to nullify the contract?”

“Can’t think of anything else it’d be. You saw how the demon’s collar on the ship fragmented when her master died.”

“How does a contract end anyway?”

“Either the terms get fulfilled or one party dies. Typically, you’d bind a greater demon to more than one person or at least have a backup. The rogue privateer who had that greater demon bound was absolutely insane to use a simple binding like what we did.”

I thought back to the demon and remembered what she’d called me. In the chaos since, I’d hardly thought about the event.

“Seyari,” I started. “Does Sovereign of Wrath mean anything to you?”

“Where the hell did you hear that?” Seyari’s voice tried and failed to hold level.

“Well, uhm, the demon bowed and called me that—"

“—Hah. Hah. Hahhhh. Of fucking course.” Seyari choked out a laugh. “FUCK!”

“It’s important, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. Yeah it really, really is. Sovereign Demons are a legend more than anything. They’re supposed to perfectly embody their aspect.”

“Is that what I inherited?”

“Probably not? You aren’t exactly the embodiment of wrath. The whole thing doesn’t fit with what I know, but neither do you. I’ve also never heard of a Sovereign Demon being bound in any of the legends about them. Maybe she was fucking with you.”

I thought for a moment. “She might have been, actually. I don’t suppose you know anything else about Sovereign Demons?”

“Not really. At least nothing reliable.”

“Why does the Church of Dhias not mention them?”

“They do, just not to the masses. They’re considered legends by most people who know of them and even then, Sovereign Demons don’t exactly fit with the Church’s narrative of demons, do they?”

“How wrong is that narrative?”

Seyari looked at me and sighed. “Take a look in a fucking mirror. Pretty damn, I’d say.”

I smiled at that. “Fair point, but I think I’m the exception, not the rule.”

“I suppose.” Seyari took the halves of collar from me. “We should bind you again. I’ll draw a new sigil. We’ve been over what you need to do to keep the binding active.”

“Are you happier with this since I’m not really bound by the ritual?”

“Yeah, Zarenna, I kinda am.” She nudged my shoulder. “Now move out of the center of the room. I have work to do and I want to get ashore in time to have a real dinner.”

“And I’d like a bath.” I looked down at the brine-soaked outfit I’d somehow gotten used to and winced.