Chapter Eighty-Six: Bucket Lists and Revelations

My feet carried me into Stella’s workshop before I even realized I was on the move. Stella’s eyes widened at my sudden appearance, but Letty’s back was to me. “The spy,” I said in a low voice, “where is she?”

Stella had only seemed frightened of me for a very brief moment. Letty’s reaction was much more in line with what I expected from a situation like this. She shrieked, jerking away and curling into herself like she feared I would strike her. She was a voluptuous Dark Elf with deep violet skin, long, silky black hair, and eyes the color of thunderheads. A corset hugged her figure, covering more skin than the silk undergarments and garter that made up the rest of her ensemble.

Her reaction earned me an eye-roll from Stella. “Dude, you had one job. Stay out of sight.”

I ignored her, focusing on Letty. “The spy. A Dark Elf? Silver hair and eyes?”

Letty flinched, but Stella put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “You can trust him,” she said softly.

“Y-yes sir,” Letty stammered.

I crossed my arms. “Where is she?”

“I-in one of the isolation rooms. Sh-she set of an enchantment that put her to sleep. As far as I know, she’s still unconscious.”

Well, that was both a good and a bad thing. No point in torturing an unconscious spy, after all, but asleep she wouldn’t be able to protect herself. “Take me to her.”

Letty’s eyes widened. “Why?”

Stella gasped. “Because she’s your spy, isn’t she?”

Any remaining blood in Letty’s face drained away. “You’re her Patron?”

“I am,” I said, not seeing any point in hiding things. I trusted Stella in a way I couldn’t quite wrap my head around, and Letty had already risked the Madame’s anger by coming to Stella for help in the first place. And since she was terrified, it was pretty clear to see she held no deception in her gaze. “And I don’t leave my own behind. Tell me where I can find Valith.”

Letty gained some of her vigor back. “That’s not her name.”

“It’s the name she chose to replace the one her last master gave her,” I said tersely. “Now, please, I won’t ask again.”

She chewed her lip while Stella watched with wide eyes. “No.”

“No?”

She gulped audibly. “If you go now, you’ll never get her out.”

I fought my instinct to head straight for where I assumed Valith was. I’d already seen that the brothel was a maze, and there was a pretty good chance the courtesan who lived here knew something I didn’t. “Explain,” I said, trying to keep my tone firmly in the ‘command’ category and not in the ‘threat’ category.

“Th-this time of night, all of the Madame’s high profile guests are being served. That means their guards are all around, on high alert, and most importantly, loyal to men who are loyal to the Madame. If you try to bust her out, you’ll only get the both of you killed.”

“You have an alternative, then?”

She shot a fearful glance towards Stella, who nodded encouragingly. “Yes. Wait until just before dawn when all of the high profile clients are leaving. Nobody would look twice at another man in a hood trying not to draw attention. There are plenty of men who visit the Silver Swallow who prefer to remain anonymous. They can’t be seen cavorting with demi-humans by the public.”

“And I’m just supposed to let Valith stew until then?”

It was Stella who answered me with a wince. “If she got hit by the sleep enchantment I made, then she’ll be out for another five or six hours minimum. They can’t try to get answers out of her while she’s unconscious.”I raised a brow at her. “You made the Madame a sleep enchantment that powerful?”

She flushed. “It’s not like I made it for her! I made it for the other girls to help them sleep after particularly rough guests and it came out a little too strong. The Madame confiscated the enchantment before I could get it nailed down. I guess I know what she uses it for now…”

The shadows I still had hiding under my clothes started to writhe angrily. Letty’s fearful reaction to them was much more in line with what I expected to see when my shadows came out to play, even if it made my gut clench uncomfortably.

A scenario like this was exactly what I’d been afraid of when I’d made Valith and the others my eyes and ears in the city. Too many times in the war had our spies been captured by enemy lines, too deep for us to even dream of rescuing them. Having to sit there knowing that somewhere in the world someone you knew was being tortured for information was a special kind of hell, one that I refused to go back to.

“Can you get to her?” I asked Letty. She nodded. “Make sure she’s still out, then keep an eye on her. I want to know as soon as she wakes. I’m not leaving here without her.”

Letty gulped, then nodded again. “Yes sir. There’s another girl, Remi. She was part of our family before Vallen died. She’s one of the Madame’s guards, but she works to help us when we can. We can trust her when it comes to Valith. I’d like to get her help as well.”

Beneath her fear, it was clear to see Letty really did want to do everything she could for her friend. As loathe as I was to include anyone I hadn’t met personally, I nodded. “If you’re sure, then we’ll need what help we can get. Nobody else, though. The fewer who know about me at this stage the better. I’ll keep hidden down here for now, go make sure Valith is alright.”

Letty nodded, shot one last frightened look towards Stella, then turned and nearly ran from the room. Stella looked at me critically, then smirked. “That was kinda hot, the way you stormed in and took control like that.” Then she swatted me on the chest. “But next time, listen, will you? I’d have gotten all that without you having to expose yourself like that.”

I grunted in response, which made her roll her eyes. “Come on then.” I followed her back into her secret workshop. She was barely in the door before she started stripping again. “What’s going to happen to Valith?”

With her creamy breasts once again bared to me and the dragon inked onto her clavicle glaring at me with what I swore was amusement, it took me a second to answer. “I’ll get her out of here one way or another.” She caught me looking and her smirk widened. “You know, I’m starting to think you’re doing this on purpose.”

She shrugged, putting my coat on but not closing the front. “I grew up surrounded by gorgeous courtesans literally trained to show off their bodies. I don’t have their boobs or butts, so the attention is kinda nice. Especially when you didn’t so much glance at Letty past a quick search to make sure she wasn’t armed.” She cocked her hip, and it took a shocking amount of willpower not to let my gaze drift towards the piercing in her bellybutton or the patch of hair further below it. “And I meant after. What’ll happen to her now that she’s been caught?”

I frowned, not sure where she was going with this. “The Madame is keeping this under wraps, so her identity should still be mostly safe. Now that I know two of her old friends are imprisoned here I highly doubt I’ll be able to keep her from helping me take this place down.”

Whatever answer she’d been expecting, that wasn’t it. With a thoughtful frown, she turned and walked further into her workshop. “You’re her Patron. Pretty sure you could do just that.”

Understanding hit me like a lightning bolt. She was expecting me to punish Valith for getting caught. “Val got caught working for me. Whatever suffering she endures now is my responsibility, and I’m not going to hold it against her that something went sideways. Shit happens, we move on and adjust.”

She scooped up a disgruntled Festus and hugged him to her chest, sandwiching him between her breasts. “I see.”

Seeing Festus reminded me I should probably keep everyone in the loop. “Festus, let Rhallani know that Valith got caught, but she isn’t in immediate danger. I’m already working to get her out, but I’ll need a few things.” I relayed the gear I wanted Rhallani to grab, then used a tendril I conjured on her armor to transfer it to my storage. Over this distance it was a little difficult, but I managed it. “Who all is still with Serena?”

“Ladies Serena, Jack, and Tiana remained at the restaurant, sir.”

I nodded. “Are Nariko, Tsuki, or Alice in the manor?”

“All of them, sir.”

“I want eyes on the Silver Swallow, but only at a distance. With luck, we can get Valith out quietly. If shit goes south though, they can let Serena and the others know.”

“Of course, sir.”

Stella nuzzled her nose into Festus’s fur, then set him down. She pulled out a few folding chairs and set one down for me. Then she bit her lip. “Lots of women there. How many of them are in your little harem?”

A laugh slipped out before I could stop it. “Most of them, if I’m being honest.”

Her eyes widened a fraction. “You sound surprised by that.”

“Most days I am.” I sat in the chair and leaned back. “Until very recently, I didn’t think I’d ever be fit to have one person willing to be involved with me, let alone…” I did some mental math, “…Six? Either six or seven. There were some…developments this morning that need to be discussed before I officially include both twins.”

Stella let out an incredulous laugh. “Seven?! You’ve got seven girls in your bed.”

Festus cleared his throat. “Rhallani has ordered me to add the obligatory ‘so far’ to that number.”

She made a choking sound, then looked me up and down. “Someone’s greedy,” she said, though her tone was teasing.

“It certainly feels that way sometimes,” I said, smiling softly. “Yet I couldn’t imagine a life without each and every one of them in it.”

Her smirk widened into something much more genuine. Then she turned away quickly and busied herself at a nearby workbench. “So, you’ll be hanging around here for a while then?” She didn’t sound put off in the slightest.

“Seems to be the case, if I’m welcome.”

“You are.” Then she mumbled something under her breath I didn’t quite catch. Then, louder, said, “I’ll just be working on some stuff over here.”

I leaned my head back against the wall and closed my eyes. It had been a long, if not productive, day, and I was ready for a nap. I was just starting to nod off when I realized I was in the room with what could possibly be the most gifted artificer I’d met since Esther.

“Stella?” I asked, not bothering to open my eyes. “Know anything about golems?”

She scoffed. “I fucking wish. Golems are number three on my bucket list. Right after a divine weapon and something that lets me eat all the food I want and never get fat.”

Not really surprising. Rhallani had scoured what books she could for golems, but it was quickly becoming a lost art. Rather than learning something as complicated as golem crafting, most would rather focus on their classes. The most anyone knew about golems these days were those created by skills.

“If I let you borrow a damaged golem, think you could figure out how to fix it?”

I was met with silence. Then, just when I was about to seek her out to read her expression, a weight landed in my lap. My eyes shot open only to meet hers, so close our noses were nearly touching. I could count each and every gold fleck in her eyes from here. Eyes that were locked on mine with a fervor that made some heat start to build in my gut. Then, when I realized she still hadn’t bothered closing my coat and was straddling me, giving me a very up close view of her entire naked front, that heat started to travel lower and lower.

“Zaren, don’t bullshit me here,” she said, her hands fisting the front of my shirt, “you have a golem? A real, actual golem? And you’re willing to let me look at it? Work on it?”

“Uh, yeah,” I said, trying and failing miserably to get a handle on the situation rapidly developing down south. “It’s a little banged up on account of a horde of etherwyrms, but most of the important enchantments are still intact. We think. And since I’m working with a goddess and in love with one of her priestesses, maybe we could see about that divine weapon someday too.”

The air seemed to fall out of her lungs. She was so close I could feel her breath on my lips, and I was struck with a sudden ache in my gut. An impulse to close that short distance, to claim those lips with my own. The pain was sharp and familiar, settling low in my chest alongside a pain I’d carried for a long, long time. Regret. For everything I hadn’t done or said before it was too late to do so. For every person in my life I lost before I could tell them how much they meant to me.

And, unless I was very mistaken, I could have sworn I saw that same pull in her gaze. Eyes that only left mine for the time it took them to glance down at my lips, her own so close that I caught the exact moment she stopped breathing.

Then, all at once, the moment seemed to break. She pulled away ever so slightly and whatever spell had taken over lessened its hold. Unfortunately, in pulling away, she sat back enough to plant her ass directly on my cock, which was painfully hard.

“Wha—” she said, her brows furrowing. Then she twisted her hips slightly, her ass pressing even more against my erection, and her eyes went wide with recognition. “Oh.”

“Sorry,” I said, still recovering from the moment we’d shared, “but it’s not every day a beautiful naked woman decides to jump in my lap like that. Especially not—”

Her attention flicked down briefly to her exposed front, but her hands didn’t move from where they were braced against my chest. “Especially not what?” she asked hesitantly, her voice uncertain.

I struggled to swallow. My throat felt parched, like I hadn’t had a drink in years. I wasn’t sure if I was going to answer or not, but then she rolled her hips once, dragging herself up my length. “Especially not a woman like you,” I said softly.

A deep flush started creeping up her cheeks. “But I’m an Elf,” she said softly.

“And Rhallani’s an Arelim,” I said immediately. “Tsuki and Ryoko are Kitsune. Noelle is…well, Noelle’s race is complicated, but safe to say she isn’t human.”

“Oh,” she said once more, her voice tiny. She rolled her hips again, as if checking to see the rock hard cock pressing into her was real.

My hands shot to her hips, holding her in place. “Not that I’m not enjoying myself, but you’re killing me here.”

Her smile this time was bashful, and I could barely think past the weight of her in my lap. The feel of silky smooth skin beneath my hands. The soft, sweet scent that I’d come to associate with magic over the years. Those damn eyes that still bored into me like they could strip away the masks I’d donned and see more than I wanted her to.

That ache returned with a vengeance, and I was gripped to say something. Words I needed to get out before it was too late. A host of words that had gone unsaid for too long, that I needed to speak before I never got another chance. The only problem was I didn’t know what those words were. It left me confused. Uncertain. Like something was wrong with me.

Her hands slid down my chest, then she paused. She shook herself, then took a breath. “The golem. You mentioned a golem.” She sounded like she was trying to remind herself more than me.

“Right. Golem. Festus—”

“She’s already waiting. And bouncing excitedly, I might add,” Festus said from where he lay.

I closed my eyes, still very aware of my hands on Stella’s hips yet completely unable to remove them just yet, and focused once again on the tendril I’d conjured on Rhallani’s armor. Like I was in two places at once, I felt what the tendril felt while still fully aware of Stella in my lap.

I caressed Rhallani, dragging the tendril down the side of her breast all the way until I reached her thigh. I couldn’t hear through the shadows, but I could feel the vibration of her giggle. Her fingers stroking the inky blackness. The kiss she pressed to it when I trailed back up her body. Thanks to Jack, we’d learned all sorts of fun things about how the tendrils reacted to the world around them, especially when I was in control of them.

Not wanting to waste any more time, I reached out for the golem Rhallani had propped up in the big room in her little reading nook. It was difficult to take something so large into my storage from so far away, but after a few minutes I managed it. Once it was gone, I went back to Rhallani once. I went south, giving the toy in her ass a playful tug then giving her ass a light smack, then I dissolved the tendril.

That ought to get her nice and fired up.

When I returned my full focus to Stella’s workshop, I realized I’d started rubbing small circles onto her thighs with my thumbs. Her attention was on me, and I didn’t miss her breaths coming harder than they had been a moment before. Not that I could, considering each one made the bared breasts right in front of me heave.

I didn’t trust my voice right now, so I merely used my shadows to summon the golem on a nearby workbench that looked sturdy enough to handle its weight, even missing an arm and a leg. Her eyes went wide and her jaw nearly fell to the floor. She jerked towards it, then froze with indecision on her face. She glanced from me to the golem, her thighs tightening around mine just enough for me to know what her dilemma was, even if I didn’t fully understand it.

With great effort, I managed to peel my hands from her skin. “Go on, nerd out,” I said with a smile.

She let out a delighted squeal, then shot towards the golem. My body missed her warmth immediately, but I mentally chastised myself. I’d literally just met this girl. I had no business fawning over her like this. I hadn’t felt like this since—

Since Karina. And Jack before her, though both instances weren’t quite the same. With Karina, I had felt fiercely protective. Like I needed to be personally responsible for her safety or I’d lose my mind. I wanted to see her smile and laugh in a way that left me confused and frustrated. And, now that I thought about it, my reaction to Jack wasn’t so dissimilar.

The second I was sure she wasn’t my enemy, I’d been drawn to her. That first sparring session still played in my head from time to time, and not just because she was a badass. At the end, for a moment, it felt like the match was about to turn into something more. Like it was the natural progression of our bout. From fighting to fucking. And the way she’d reacted to it, I couldn’t help but think she felt the same. And when we’d Linked, the kiss that had followed didn’t just feel right, but it felt familiar. The heat that pulled me towards Jack, even in the beginning, felt far too similar to the heat that pulled me towards the girls I’d been sharing my bed with.

Something in my mind snapped into place. The thing all three had in common led me to a train of thought that was even more worrying. How a part of me had trusted Tiana from the start. How quickly the casual touches to bolster her skill became something much more intimate. How badly I’d needed to free Ryoko and Tsuki from the prison I’d found them in. How protective I’d grown over them, even from day one. How my body seemed to relax when they shared our tent, like it could rest knowing the people I had to protect were all within arm’s reach.

Even back to Rhallani. Hells, she’d literally stabbed me and I’d laughed it off. I hadn’t really been angry with her for even a second, despite being perfect strangers. And watching her emerge from her shell, seeing how excited she got when she learned or realized something, how quickly I’d gotten used to having her at my side, both when we were asleep and awake. Every time I saw her, alive and well and happy something inside me unfurled just a little bit more. Something that had been coiled tight for a long, long time.

And all of them had one thing in common.

The shimmer.

If I wasn’t sure it was connected to me somehow before, I was now. Had Allura done something to these girls? Given them some kind of subconscious attraction towards me? Or maybe it was the other way around? Had she tethered them to me in some way that would bypass the walls I’d been forced to build around my heart? If so, why? Was she trying to help me or manipulate me?

Suddenly it felt like the floor was falling out from underneath me. Everything I knew pulled into question. Allura was the goddess of family, love, and bonds after all. Surely something like this wasn’t out of her wheelhouse. And if I was right, if she’d created those bonds between me and these girls, was it fair to them? If she’d intervened, how much of our relationships was me and the girls and how much was Allura? If they were happy with me, did it matter? Would they hate me if they knew? If Allura had stacked the deck in my favor like this, would everything fall apart as soon as her deception came to light?

“Zaren?”

The voice snapped me out of my spiral. It took me a second to place who it belonged to. Where I was. With some difficulty, I managed to focus on Stella. I recognized the look on her face. Her posture. She’d asked me something—likely more than once—but I’d been busy drowning in my own head and missed it.

“Sorry, what?”

Stella pursed her lips. “I was asking if you had the control mechanism. Most of this makes sense to me, but I’d like to see if I can look at that as well. Then I want to see if I can figure out its power source.”

I closed my thoughts up in a box and locked it away to be panicked over later and stood. I summoned the mangled control bracer and handed it to her. “It got a little chewed on, but Rhallani thinks the magic is mostly intact. And the golem is powered by a soul that’s been trapped inside it. Trying to help the soul is on my long, long list of shit to do.”

She took a step away. “A soul? That’s horrible.”

I nodded. “Yeah, it definitely is. Rhallani loves this thing though, so I was wondering if you could get it up and moving. Even if it’s not battle ready, I think it would make her extremely happy.” The sudden image of the golem in a maid uniform popped into my head and I had to stifle a laugh.

She frowned, setting the bracer on the table and donning her goggles. “I can fix the golem, but I’m not sure how much of a difference it’ll make. It’s power source is dwindling. Not sure how much longer it’ll have.”I frowned, then stepped closer to the golem. I reached out with my soul sense and realized she was right. The soul was smaller than it had been before. Emptier. Like it was leaking where the chains punctured it.

“Is that a good thing?” she asked. “I mean, wouldn’t that mean the soul was free?”

I shook my head. “Not quite. The golem is literally consuming the soul. Killing it. The owner of that soul is already dead, and these enchantments serve to keep the soul from moving on into the afterlife. Once the soul runs out of juice, it ceases to exist. Gone forever. It wouldn’t be suffering anymore, I suppose, but…”

Stella chewed her lip ring. She swapped the glass, then looked from the golem to me, then down to herself. “What if you Linked it?”

I blinked. “What?”

“Your Link thingy you did with me. It creates a tether between souls, right? You mentioned it being two-way, and I feel better in a way that I can’t really put into words since we Linked, so maybe it would help?”

I put a hand on the golem’s torso. “I’m not sure a soul without a body would have the autonomy to accept the Link, but you may have a point.”

She swapped the glass again. “If the soul prefers to just wither away, surely it can just turn you down, right?”She made good points, and Rhallani would be devastated to let the soul just disappear after all the times the golem had saved our asses. Figuring there wasn’t much to lose, I activated [Forge Link].

Searing pain dropped me to my knees. A pained gasp slipped out of me and the room blurred as the Link was burned into existence between me and the golem. It took longer than it ever had before, and it felt completely opposite to how it felt to Link to a shimmering soul. Like I was not only having to Forge the Link itself, but the framework for both souls to actually connect to that Link.

It was far worse than the first Link I’d Forged, and for a moment I wondered if my journey was really going to end here. Like this. But finally, mercifully, the pain lessened and the room swam back into focus. Stella was on her knees in front of me, one hand on my chest while the other was pressed to my cheek. Tears were in her eyes, and her expression was panic stricken.

“Well that sucked,” I managed eventually.

Her shoulders slumped with relief. “Thank fuck, I thought my stupid idea might have killed you. Are you alright? You looked like you were in pain.”

“I’m fine,” I promised. She looked so distressed all I wanted to do was pull her into my arms and reassure her, but after my brief spiral involving the shimmering souls I felt the best course of action was to keep my distance for now. I pushed my aching body to my feet and rolled out my joints, then checked my status. When I did, alarm shot through me.

[Soul Essence: 92/210]

Fuck. Stella’s Link had only cost twenty, just like the other shimmers. The link to the golem had nearly cost a full hundred. Almost triple the cost of a standard Link. If I had done this before I’d started to increase the number of Links I had, it could very well have killed me. Time to see if it worked.

Nell, huh? Well, Rhallani was going to be thrilled. She now had a name for the golem. I checked Nell’s soul and saw that it was already in better shape. It glowed brighter, and it no longer leaked from where the chains pulled against it. From the Link between us, I got the faintest pulses of something akin to gratitude.

“Alright, hopefully I don’t have to go tethering myself to any more trapped souls any time soon.” I rubbed my chest. “That hurt like a motherfucker.”

Stella put her hand over mine. “You’re sure you’re okay? Maybe you should sit down.”

“I’m fine, Stella. Trust me, I’ve walked away from much worse pain than this.” Still, I felt more than a little overheated at the moment. I peeled off the fine coat that had served as my noble disguise and dropped it on a work bench, leaving me in nothing but a black cotton shirt.

Her eyes devoured my chest hungrily. “You know, it’s really unfair that only one of us is naked.”

I arched a brow. “With Rhallani back at the manor, I can very easily get you some clothes.”

She stuck her tongue out at me. “Too late, buddy. We both know you like what you see,” she squeezed her breasts and my cock jerked in response.

I couldn’t help but laugh as I lowered myself into the chair. “You and Rhallani are going to get along swimmingly. Gods help us all.”

Her grin widened and she scooped up the control bracer. “Don’t blame me, can’t you tell I grew up in an unhealthy environment? Surrounded by sex and nudity all my life, you should feel sorry for me.” She pouted at me unconvincingly. “Would it help if I said you being naked too would make me feel much more comfortable? I’m just a socially inept little Elf girl, after all.”

I laughed even harder. “Care to try that again holding the lie-ball?”

She opened her mouth to respond, then her ivory cheeks turned a deep shade of scarlet. “N-no I would not!”

I kicked one leg up so my ankle was braced on my knee. “Because the lie-ball would show you’re lying? Or that you’re telling the truth? I wonder how blue the smoke would get if you did,” I said thoughtfully, tapping my chin.

Her blush deepened and she threw a tool at me. One of my shadows shot out and nabbed it out of midair. “Ass,” she said, though she was smiling almost as hard as she was blushing. “And I can probably fix your golem, but it’ll take time. And materials. It could take me weeks to smuggle in all the shit I need.”

I shrugged. “Make a list. We’ve got plenty of materials at our place that I’d be willing to part with for a project like this. Add on whatever you want and we can consider it your payment, since gold would only raise suspicions right now. Whatever we don’t have on hand we can grab and I’ll bring it by.”

Her eyes flashed. “You mean you’ll come back?”

“Of course,” I said, perhaps a little too quickly. I was hardly an expert when it came to women, but I was pretty sure telling her I’d burn this whole place to the ground and kill everyone in it before I allowed some slimy fuck to lay a single hand on her for nothing more than a handful of silver might give her the wrong idea. Or the right one, which might actually be worse.

In response, she started working her lip ring again. This time it was less out of anxiety and more out of something that made me want to march over and taste her lip ring for myself. And maybe a few of her other piercings while I was at it. A few tattoos, too.

Fuck’s sake, it was a good thing Rhallani couldn’t read my mind. She’d be having a field day right now.

If I wasn’t already struggling to hide just how aroused I was, the wave of pure happiness that rolled through our Link would have put me there. I took a deep breath, trying to focus on anything other than her lithe body that flashed me every time she spun from one work bench to another, going from notes to examining to throwing together early prototypes for replacement limbs. It hadn’t even been an hour and I was already about to lose my mind. Something told me this was going to be a long night.