Chapter Thirty: Traps and Trades

CW:

Heavy implications of nonconsensual sex in the final section of this chapter.

We stayed like that for as long as we dared, but we needed to get moving. I felt lighter than I had before, and I knew it was because of what I’d told her. I’d never voiced any of that aloud, not even to my allies before Allura. Hells, most of it I’d never really put together until the words were coming out of my mouth. Telling Serena helped me make sense of it, and it helped me remind why I’d decided to do this in the first place.

If I did as Allura asked, Eliya would get another chance. She’d get to live a real life, not the hellish existence Karn had forced on her. So would Hannah. So would the sisters Siri and Sora. So would Ina. So would all the others I’d failed.

I’d just finished tucking myself away and finally throwing a shirt on when Noelle stuck her head out of the crag uncertainly. Serena squeaked and her hand shot up to her neck, no doubt covering her privates back up. Noelle saw us and her eyes flicked to mine, then the corners of her mouth twitched downward.

“Noelle?” I asked.

Rather than answering, she walked straight up to me and threw her arms around my torso. I wrapped my arms around her with a surprised look to Serena, but she was as shocked as I was. Noelle buried her face in my chest, and I ran my hand through her short hair. “Hey, it’s alright.”

“I know. It’s alright now, you’re alive.” She sniffled. “I’m glad you’re alive.”

An unexpected wave of emotion welled in my chest. “I’m sorry I worried you.”

She squeezed me once, then pulled away and wiped her nose. “I will lead now.”

Serena’s brows rose, but I just smiled. “Is that so?”

She nodded curtly. “You are hurt and low on mana, so we can’t risk you going off on your own again to use your enhanced senses. My sense of smell can help us find the surface, so it would be better if you were in the back for protection.”

Her fists were clenched tightly at her sides, and her jaw was set. She was waiting for me to argue, I realized. “That sounds like a good plan to me,” I said instead. “But we should stay closer together than we have been, alright?”

Her pupils widened, then she gave me another curt nod. “You will want to move soon?”

“Yes. We’ve sat still for too long as it is.”

“I will get the others.”

I followed her into the crag with Serena behind me. I raised a brow at Rhallani and Tiana. The former’s hair was messy and her cheeks were rosy while the latter was still panting and flushed. Tiana, leaning on Rhallani with neither of Rhallani’s hands visible, looked up at me. “You were right. She’s very creative.”

Rhallani looked at me triumphantly and I laughed. The sound roused Elisa, who looked around wildly for a moment before wincing and reaching for her leg. “It feels better,” she said. Then she sat up and hugged herself. “I was really hoping this had all been a really bad nightmare.”

“I know the feeling.” I crouched down next to her, addressing the others. “We’re changing up our formation. Noelle is in front, I’ll bring up the rear. Are you okay to walk?”

She nodded. “I’ll manage. I just wish I wasn’t such dead weight. All of you are so amazing and I’m just a liability. If I had my gear, then maybe…”

I mentally smacked myself. “Right. In all the excitement, it completely slipped my mind.” I conjured up the bag with all the tools and metal balls and held it out to her.

Her eyes went wide. “My stuff!” She snatched it from me and started rifling through. I noticed Tiana lean away slightly when she did. “You got my stuff! You’re amazing!” She pulled out a few of the balls. “Oh it’s good to see all of you again.”

I chuckled, then put a hand under her arm. She held onto me and easily lifted her up and helped her out of the small alcove. The others filed out as well, and I handed her off to Rhallani. She was already steadier, and she could move much easier now. She still couldn’t put much weight on her leg, but she could at least move in an emergency.

Noelle made sure we were all out, then nodded once and headed off with the golem in tow. I trailed a hand along the curve of Tiana’s rear and she shot me an appreciative look, then stepped closer to me. I started to softly caress her while we walked and her mouth curled up in a half smile.

“The spiders have already isolated me once, and it nearly cost us everything,” I said. I received worried looks, but nobody argued. I conjured a bag and slipped our remaining potions, some rations, and two water canteens in it. I held it out to Tiana, and she took it with a nod. “The tactic was as close to successful as they’ve managed so far, so expect them to repeat it. If we do get separated again, I want to make sure I’m not the one with all the resources.”

I had enough mana for at least a few tendrils, so I conjured one on myself and one on Noelle just to be safe. We were vanguard and rearguard, so it made the most sense. We moved through the tunnels as quickly as we dared, but we walked for nearly an hour without coming across any resistance. I didn’t like that one bit, especially not with my internal clock telling me nightfall wasn’t far off. Many of the more dangerous breeds of spider would be nocturnal, and I wanted to get out of these caverns before they became a problem.

My left arm would still be little to no good in a fight, but it was great for occasional touches on Tiana’s body. If arousal is what made her stronger, then not knowing exactly when or where I’d touch next would keep her on a nice edge. From the heated looks she kept giving me, I figured I was doing a pretty good job. When I used an incline we were walking up to slide a hand along the inside of her leg and over her rear entrance, she gave me a look that said she planned to make very good use of that promise I’d made her.

They finally launched an ambush, and Tiana proved just how good a job I was doing. The spiders had barely emerged from their murder holes before she shot four bolts of arcane energy out that eviscerated anything and everything they touched. Just four killed three times as many spiders as six had earlier, and it was child’s play for Noelle and Serena to clean up what was left.

“See?” she asked, breathing heavily, “not a slut. Just someone who was an idiot when they were choosing their class.”

I chuckled. “Hardly. That was quite the display. I gripped her bountiful ass cheek in one hand and when she gasped I pressed my lips to hers. She kissed me back greedily, then a shudder ran through her body and she jerked away with her eyes rolled back into her head. She would have fallen if I hadn’t pulled her to my chest.

“Fuck!” She took a second to right herself, but she didn’t distance herself from me. “Fuck you’re good with those hands. I’ve been on edge this whole fucking time, but I wasn’t ready for that kiss.”

I tried not to feel too much pride that the kiss was what pushed her over the edge. Instead I gave her ass another squeeze. “Keep vaporizing spiders and I’ll give you much more than that measly peck.” I leaned in close and whispered in her ear, “imagine how good my lips might feel in other places.” A moan slipped through her lips and she clamped her hand over her mouth with rosy cheeks.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had a party member capable of keeping me this worked up.” She shook her head. “Almost makes me glad those spiders caught me.”

I gave her ass a smack, then was promptly mesmerized by the shockwaves that traveled across her ample and poorly concealed rear. “Just imagine what I’ll be able to accomplish when we’re somewhere warm, soft, and I’m at your mercy.”

She bit her lip. “Where the fuck have you been all my life?” she mumbled.

Oh, you know, stuck in a thirty year coma imposed by a goddess. The usual. The answer was so ridiculous I almost laughed. In all honesty I’d been thinking along the same lines. Keeping her aroused was not only fun, but it was a great way to keep my mind off where we were. The amused glances from Serena and openly jealous looks from Rhallani helped too. I was sure Rhallani was already coming up with a plan to have me feel her up on a regular basis like this too.

We walked for nearly two hours before everything went wrong.

The Valax had been suspiciously quiet for far too long, and as a result I was starting to think Tiana might jump me soon. It seemed I’d been doing a little too well when it came to turning her on, and from the way her nipples were trying their best to cut through the fabric and the faint wetness I could see on the insides of her thighs I was starting to get a little worried.

Then the ambush came, and she seemed content to unleash her frustration on the hordes in front of her. More bolts went flying and spiders were obliterated by the dozens. Then the other half of the ambush came from behind. I spun and conjured a second tendril, hoping my one handed blade would be enough to hold them back, when even more bolts arced around me. I threw myself into the fray and my tendrils whipped around me like a whirlwind, slicing any Valax that got within reach.

I took a page out of the royal’s book and thinned them, making them much longer. They were less destructive, but against numerous small enemies like the Valax that hardly mattered. [Horde Slayer] ensured I could handle any spiders that somehow managed to avoid Tiana’s bolts or my shadows.

It was right after I’d dispatched the last of my side of the ambush that I realized the trap. There were twice as many spiders on the front end, and they were all larger. It was among the sea of yellow and black that I saw a color that didn’t belong flash in the light of the lamp that hung from Serena’s hip. A color that no Valax bore on their carapace. An electric, glowing blue.

I cursed and sprinted past Tiana, Rhallani, and Elisa, who was in the process of throwing two of the metal spheres towards the spiders. There was a brief pause, then the spheres began billowing flames that stuck to any of the spiders it caught. As impressive as it was, I had eyes for only one thing. The flash of blue headed straight for Serena.

I conjured a tendril through her armor, and it formed at the base of her spine as usual. Instead of lurching towards the spiders, though, I commanded it to shoot towards me. I met it with a tendril of my own and they intertwined. I yanked, hauling Serena back towards me. I spun around her, cutting the first of the spiders with electric blue markings in half with a spinning strike. They were three feet tall with long fangs and longer limbs. The second I stabbed right in the center of its many eyes, killing it instantly. The third saw my strike coming and skittered just enough to the side that my blow didn’t kill it instantly, and my blade stuck in its tough carapace.

Before I could pull the blade free, the phase spider teleported us both. The light and my friends vanished in a violent blue flash, replaced by darkness and the skittering of hundreds of legs. I ripped my sword free and finished the phase spider while my tendrils lashed out at anything and everything around me.

[Horde Slayer] went into overdrive. My agility went so high it felt like time itself was slowing down. My strength surged enough that I could hardly tell the difference between cutting through air or carapace. The boost to my dexterity meant that I had no sooner thought of how I wanted my blade to move before it did so. My senses stopped differentiating between individual spiders. There were only masses of carapace that made perfect targets for my sword.

I swung it until the blade hit stone and shattered, and in the moment before I could summon another weapon they surged forward. I felt bites and venom, and not all of them were of the magical variety. I drew a blade that would have taken two hands to swing but felt light as a feather in my strengthened grip and lashed out. I drew a shorter sword in my injured arm, in too dire of a situation to leave my hand empty. I conjured more shadows and hurled myself through the dark in a whirlwind of spider guts.

I managed to get my back to a wall and keep the horde ahead of me, though not without suffering more bites. The greatsword snapped too, so I hurled it into the fray and relied on my shadows to keep enough distance between me and the enemy to down an antidote. Whatever recovery my body had managed since the last of the mana potions was just enough to fight any of the more lethal venoms in my body, and from the way the world was beginning to speed up I knew I’d cut through a large number of the spiders. I drew a hand-and-a-half sword, ignoring the burning pain in my bicep, and kept hacking.

I was too slow to react to the spider that fell from the ceiling.

It couldn’t have been more than a foot long, but it was heavy. It slammed into my back and, in the second before my shadows wiped it away, sunk its fangs into the flesh below my neck. I screamed when the venom raced through me like lava in my veins. The room pitched and I fell to a knee. The moment it ripped through me I knew it was not a magical poison, which meant my only protection was my fifteen Fortitude.

My shadows bought me time to get my weapons back up, but the tunnel around me started to pitch and roll. Not a lethal venom, but one that was attacking my senses. Them being enhanced only intensified the sensation. I kept fighting, but the sounds from the spiders were starting to blur together. More slipped through, and I ended up having to use [Shadow Stitching] when the injuries piled up a little high.

Then I swung at where I thought a spider to be only to hit air. Immediately I felt fangs bite me from where there was nothing. I lashed out and felt my blade bite into something even though my ears were convinced there was nothing there. A spider lunged at me, but my blade passed through nothing and snapped against the stone that was a foot higher than it should have been. It wasn’t just attacking my senses, it was deceiving them entirely.

The tunnel seemed to tilt again, but my shadows were seemingly unaffected. I conjured more, relying on them to do what my senses apparently couldn’t. I lost feeling in my fingers, then my arms, then my legs. I tried to stay standing but the ground rushed up to meet me. I felt legs on my back just before something heavy and long pressed into my back. Metal. A sheathe. The cursed blade, strapped to me without me having summoned it.

Fangs and claws bounced off it while my shadows picked off the other spiders. I hadn’t drawn it out this time, but when I tried to reach for my storage to banish it I couldn’t find my magic. My skills. They were there, but just out of reach. My eyes only saw darkness, but my other senses were convinced the tunnel was rolling around me. I tried to stand, then to crawl, but my limbs wouldn’t listen. My smell and taste faded first, then the sounds around me faded to nothingness. I clung to the cold stone floor until that faded too, and I entered oblivion.

# # #

Allie couldn’t suppress her shivering no matter how hard she tried. The thin, ratty clothes did little to nothing to trap any heat against her body, and the stone under her bare feet sapped any semblance of warmth from her. It didn’t help that the strip of metal around her neck chafed and pressed into her. It’s cold edges were unrelenting, no matter how she tried to position it.

She avoided looking at the others as best she could. They were as scared as she was, but she knew she couldn’t show it. She wasn’t sure when it had happened, but at some point they’d started to look to her. When they panicked, her presence calmed them. Made the punishments more bearable. She’d hide her panic, for their sake.

But she was scared. Panic drew closer by the minute while everyone looked at him. The man who owned them. He stood there with a girl at his side. Small, pale, dark hair and darker eyes that belonged one of the smartest girls Allie had ever met. She couldn’t have been more than fourteen, maybe a little older than Allie, and she was dressed in the same awful rags that they all wore.

The man next to her was tall and gaunt. It was hard to tell if he was fifty or five hundred, but his long, cruel fingers held a strength that he was never hesitant to use. Eyes that looked like they might have been gold before they soured to an ugly yellow scanned across them. The girl next to him shivered not unlike Allie, and she doubted it had anything to do with the cold either.

“Listen up,” he commanded. The cold metal around her throat grew hot, and she knew her collar was awaiting a command. “Stay where you are, and stay silent.”

Allie’s throat closed and her feet would no longer respond. She knew everyone around her was in the same situation, the girl next to the tall man included. His gaze raked over them again, and she forced herself not to flinch when it reached her.

“You’re all here today to learn a very valuable lesson. Four, here,” he stroked the girl’s dark hair, “has been going where she doesn’t belong. Not only that, but it seems she’s taken it upon herself to start teaching some of you things you have no need to learn.” His eyes fell on the boy on Allie’s other side, the same age as her. He had dark hair and blue eyes that stared far too intently for a boy his age. There was a thirteen on his collar.

Thirteen flinched, but he could make no noise. Raise no defense. The man continued. “You are here to learn what I teach you and nothing else. You are here to do as I tell you and nothing else. You are not here to make friends or form relationships. You will do as I command, or you will be punished. Is that clear, Thirteen?”

The boy next to her just glared back with his jaw set. She knew the look. He was tough. Tougher than anyone she’d met so far. He was someone who’d already been through hell and thought there wasn’t much worse that could be done to him. She could see the challenge in his eyes. The man hadn’t broken him yet. He didn’t think he could be broken. She wished she could shake him and try to tell him just how wrong he was.

The man looked down at Four. “Look at me, girl.” She did. “You’ve become a tainted experiment now. You should have left well enough alone. You’re lucky you haven’t ruined any of my other experiments. Now, look at Thirteen.” She did, a film of tears in her eyes. The man looked to Thirteen as well. “I certainly hope the lesson sticks, Thirteen. I do hate repeating myself, but I’m not above it.”

Then, in front of all of them, he drew a knife. Four whimpered once just before he pulled it across her throat. Allie looked away, but Thirteen didn’t. He watched Four die with horror on his face. His fists were clenched and his muscles spasmed while he tore and fought against the collar, but the command held him in place.

Allie wanted to close her eyes, but she forced herself to at least watch him. She couldn’t look at Four, but she could hear the desperate gasping and gurgling as the poor girl died. She was trying to say something, but either the command or the cut kept her silent. The tears were running down Thirteen’s face, and he was hardly the only one.

“The rest of the day is yours,” the man said, as if he hadn’t just murdered an innocent child. “But if I were you, I would keep what happened here today fresh in your minds. We move on to the next phase in three months. You’ll be split into groups of six, and only those of you who show promise will move on.” He glanced down at Four’s body. “I suggest you endeavor to be one of those who do.”

He turned and stalked away, and Thirteen fell to his knees. “Hannah…” he whispered. Allie closed her eyes. She knew some of the other kids had chosen names. Either the ones they remembered or one they wanted to use. Hannah was a nice name. One that Allie wouldn’t forget any time soon.

Thirteen wept without taking his eyes off her, silent sobs wracking his body. The others all took one look at him and backed away quickly. Nobody was eager to be the next example. Allie forced herself to look at Four. No, at Hannah. She was face down, the red pooling around her. One of her hands was outstretched, like she’d been reaching for Thirteen in her final moments.

Everyone else filed away, but Allie stepped in front of him. “Stop looking at her,” she told him. “You’re only hurting yourself.” She held a hand out. “Come on, let’s go back to our cells.”

He didn’t respond. His sapphire blue eyes continued to stare straight ahead in pain and disbelief. Her chest clenched. The man had broken him so completely in a single move. It shattered her heart. She grabbed his hand and pulled him to his feet, then started dragging him away from Hannah’s body. He let himself be led away without saying a word, as if he hadn’t realized the command was no longer active.

He’d been broken, and Allie had three months to put him back together again. She’d paid close attention to the other kids, and most of them simply weren’t that strong. Emotionally, mentally, or physically. If what they’d been through so far was only the first phase, she was under no illusions that many of them wouldn’t make it past the second one. Thirteen had a strength in him that made her think of her dad before he’d died. The kind that came from surviving. The kind you weren’t born with, but that you earned with blood and tears.

Allie wasn’t strong, but she could pretend to be. Fake it till you make it. That had been what her dad had taught her. He’d also taught her to recognize strength. The kind that Thirteen had. If she could figure out how to help him, then maybe he could help her escape this place. If she could help him recover from this, then he might just be strong enough to make it to the end of whatever horror show they’d all found themselves in. It was a faint hope, maybe even a foolish one, but it was the enough to keep her from losing her mind entirely.

# # #

There were still tears on Allie’s face when she woke from her nightmare. The tiny room that was her entire living space threatened to close around her, but jamming her eyes shut just made things worse. Another incredibly vivid scene from a life that wasn’t hers. She’d had one every time she’d closed her eyes ever since the man had cut her with that knife, and she had no idea what to do about them. Sometimes the visions even came for her when she was awake, and those were really taking their toll.

They’d calmed over the last few days at least, and that was the only reason she hadn’t asked to be moved to an asylum. She was getting better, which meant there was a chance she wouldn’t be completely crazy forever. She could still barely remember that first day. Vague flashes of Nora carrying her to safety. Ending up in an infirmary that she’d never be able to afford long enough for a healer to claim there was nothing wrong with her. She’d been too busy trying to stay conscious through the feeling of being ripped apart over and over again to argue.

It had to have been some kind of torture. Maybe the person whose memories she was seeing had been a victim of that green knife, and it had somehow transferred her pain to Allie. It was the only explanation she could come up with other than her going insane, so she clung to it desperately. Every memory had been horrific. Even the one where she’d watched a poor girl murdered had been one of the better ones. At least Allie hadn’t been beaten in that one. She got beat in a lot of her dreams, and the pain lingered when she woke without leaving a mark on her body.

She closed her eyes and centered herself, just as Nora had suggested. She wasn’t some thirteen-year-old slave girl enduring hell. She was Allisandre Luce. She was a nineteen-year-old class C adventurer struggling to get by ever since her parents had died to the sickness that had swept through the southern cities. She was suffering from the effects of some skill. She wasn’t going crazy. She wasn’t losing her mind.

The door to her tiny apartment opened and closed, and she heard the sounds of Nora’s heavy footfalls. Her friend—her savior—moved slowly, occasionally sucking in her breath from pain. Allie remained facing the wall, not ready to look at Nora so soon after her nightmare. She tried to wipe her face clean without moving too much. Nora would only worry, and she was already doing too much as it was.

She listened to the sound of Nora depositing her equipment in the ratty wardrobe jammed into the corner of the room. Then the sound of bare feet drew closer until her weight sank onto the bed behind Allie. She smelled food, but despite her hunger she wasn’t sure she could stomach it. She could still smell Hannah’s blood.

Allie couldn’t stop herself from flinching when Nora gently placed her hand on Allie’s shoulder. No pretending she was still asleep now. She rolled over enough that she could look up at her large, muscular friend. Her normally bright red hair was still damp from bathing, and half of her face was bruised. “Are you alright?”

Nora just shrugged. “I’m a frontline. Job was pretty shit, but we’ll make rent for the month at least. We got lucky though. We should start saving for next month as quick as we can.”

Allie’s gut twisted. Nora was out there risking her life while Allie was stuck in bed. They were growing less frequent, but she still had episodes where memories claimed her and she lost time. They couldn’t afford to risk it happening in battle, so Nora had insisted that Allie rest for a little while longer.

“I’ll help on the next job.”

Nora took one look at Allie’s face and her gaze softened. Hesitantly, as if afraid Allie might stop her, she reached out and gently brushed back Allie’s long black hair. “Another nightmare?”

Allie could only nod and draw her knees to her chest. Nora was the only one who believed her, and they didn’t have near enough money for any kind of specialist. It frustrated Nora almost as much as it frustrated Allie, and that only made Allie feel like more of a burden.

Nora tucked some of Allie’s hair behind her ear. “Can—can I hold you?”

Heat pricked the backs of Allie’s eyes. It wasn’t fair to Nora, but words couldn’t express how badly she needed just that. She nodded once, and she felt Nora’s weight shifting until she was spooning Allie from behind. She slid an arm under Allie’s head and wrapped it over the top of her chest, grabbing her shoulder, and Allie grabbed her hand gratefully.

They laid like that for a while. It only increased the guilt, but Nora’s warmth made her feel much better. The simple feeling that she wasn’t completely alone was just about the only thing that had gotten her through the last week. Nora ran her fingers through Allie’s hair, collecting it and pushing it out of the way so she could brush her lips against the nape of Allie’s neck.

“Nora…”

“I know,” Nora whispered, wrapping her arm over Allie’s stomach and giving it a squeeze. “I’m sorry. I just want to make you feel better, and it kills me that I don’t know how.”

“You’re trying, and that’s more than can be said for anyone else.”

“All the same, you’ve made it clear you just want to be friends. I can respect that.”

Allie tucked her chin into Nora’s arm. “That’s not…quite how I’d put it.”

Nora tensed, then said in a carefully easy tone, “then how would you put it?”

“I don’t know. That’s half the problem.”

Nora’s thumb started to rub slow circles on her shoulder. “The thing all of your boyfriends was missing… it wasn’t that they weren’t girls, was it?”

The barely restrained hope in her voice made Allie laugh. It was the first time she’d done so since the attack, and she felt the tension drain from Nora. “If only it were that simple. No, I’m definitely attracted to guys.”

Nora grunted in a way that said she wasn’t so sure. Allie twisted in her grip until they were face to face, Allie’s head still resting on Nora’s arm, and arched a brow. Nora had the decency to look abashed, then she doubled down. “From what I’ve seen, no you’re not.”

“And you’re the expert now?”

Nora used the hand not under Allie to brush a knuckle along her chin. The movement sent chills through Allie in a way none of her boyfriends had ever done. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and I don’t think you’re attracted to men. I think you’re attracted to a man. A specific one. No other will do.”

Allie opened her mouth to deliver her rebuttal but found that she had none. “It’s not that. I’m not comparing them to anyone or anything, I just…” she trailed off, not sure where she was even trying to go. “My brain recognized that they’d be good partners, but my heart just won’t get on board.

Nora smirked. “Do you feel that way about me?”

Allie felt heat rising in her cheeks. “Well, not exactly.”

Nora pulled Allie in closer with an ease that made heat start collecting in Allie’s core. “I’m afraid I’m very bad when it comes to people, so you’ll need to spell it out for me.”

Oh, Allie was very aware. It was frustratingly endearing. “I don’t feel like you’re missing whatever it is they were missing because I…” Oh gods. There was no good way to say what she wanted to say.

The hand Nora placed on Allie’s hip was not helping either. “You…?” Nora prompted.

Up close Allie couldn’t look away from the deep blue of Nora’s eyes. The blue that was so eerily similar to Thirteen’s eyes from her dream. Allie cleared her throat. She either said it aloud or let it drop, and she was tired of being alone all the time.

“I want you in a different way.” Nora’s eyes went wide, but she didn’t interrupt. “Not in the same way I want…whatever it is I want. It's less like I'm looking for a boyfriend and more like I'm trying to find a piece of myself that's been ripped away. Being around you doesn’t do anything to fill that aching hole in me that’s always been there, but it makes it easier to bear it.”

Nora’s jaw clenched and unclenched, but she didn’t ask the question Allie knew was burning at her. “I want you around, and…” She put her hand on Nora’s where it was still on her hip. “And I want you around as more than a friend, I think.”

Nora pulled them even closer together until Allie’s breasts were pressed into Nora’s slightly larger set. “You sound so reluctant to admit that.”

“It feels unfair to you,” Allie admitted. As soon as she said it a weight lifted off her. “Asking to be in a relationship while pining for someone else the entire time.”

“Feels more unfair to you. Not allowing yourself even a chance at happiness because you might someday meet your dream guy.”

Allie blinked at the bluntness, but it was hard to come up with an argument. “And if we take things further and I meet that dream guy? If I fall in love at first sight and have to choose between you and him?”

Nora just shrugged. “I don’t mind sharing, my dad had four wives. Maybe your man will be interested in big strong girls, too.” She slid a hand down Allie’s thigh and lifted her leg to drape it over her own. “I just want to find some way to get rid of that sadness in you. If you’re happy, any way I can be in your life is fine by me.”

With trembling fingers, Allie reached up and put her hand to Nora’s cheek. She gently ran a thumb across the barely-healed scar that had nearly taken her eye. It went from just above the inner edge of her brow, down her nose, all the way over her mouth and chin. Any deeper and it would have killed her. At first every time she’d seen it just hit home how close she’d come to losing her friend. Now that it was healing, Allie couldn’t help but find it slightly alluring. Fitting on her broad, muscular yet feminine frame.

Nora watched her unblinking, waiting for her reply. Not moving a muscle. Not for the first time, Allie wondered what Nora had been through in her past. If it was as lonely as Allie’s. She’d asked once while they were on mission, and all Nora had divulged was that there wasn’t anyone waiting for her to come home. It was the first thing that had brought them closer together. That shared sense of loneliness.

“If—if you’re sure,” Allie said, hesitantly pulling her face closer to Nora’s

“I am.” Nora went the rest of the way and their lips met. Nora crushed Allie into her front, her other hand rubbing up and down her thigh perilously close to where Allie really wanted to be touched right now. Allie’s hands weren’t idle either, one sinking into Nora’s fiery mane while the other traced over her iron-hard muscles. Allie was by no means a small girl, but Nora still dwarfed her in every aspect. Something Allie had never quite appreciated as much as she did right now.

Nora had just cupped Allie’s rear, bringing her own leg forward and between hers, when someone knocked on the door. Nora pulled away with a growl. “I say we ignore them.”

“I agree,” Allie said breathlessly. She chased Nora’s lips with her own, a desperation she’d never quite known the depth of driving her forward. Then whoever it was banged even harder on the door.

“I’ll kill them, then we can get back to it.” She rolled away, and Allie immediately missed the intense heat that radiated from her.

Nora stomped to the door and ripped it open. From where Allie sat on the bed, panting, she couldn’t see who it was. She could hear her though. “You Nora?” a gruff, angry sounding woman demanded.

Allie sat up, scooting closer to where her sword leaned against the wall just in case. Nora crossed her arms. “I doubt I’m the only one, but that is my name.”

“You know a couple of pricks who got their shit rocked on their last job? Alenden Joss and Roarke…” she paused, and Allie heard crinkling paper. “Roarke something-or-other. I don’t know.”

Nora grimaced. “If they want to pin the mission going bad on me, then they’d better—”

“Oh no, I took one look at Roarke and figured out exactly what the fuck went wrong. He spent half the time bitching about how his arm still hurt. No, I’m here looking for information.”

“Come back later, then. I’m busy.” Nora tried to shut the door, but whoever it was stopped it. I saw Nora’s muscles flex, but whoever was on the other side of the doorway was just as strong as she was it seemed.

“Fuck that, I’ve got other shit to do. Just tell me everything you remember about the thing that fucked you up.”

Nora unconsciously ran a thumb over her scar. “I was down for most of the fight. I probably can’t tell you anything they already haven’t.”

The woman cursed so foully Allie couldn’t stop herself from grabbing her sword. “And your last party member? Allisandre Luce? They were extra dodgy when I asked about her. Where can I find her?”

Allie could see the muscles in Nora’s back tense through her shirt. “Allie is still recovering. Give me your information and I’ll pass it along. She can come see you when she’s better.”

“Again, fuck that. Look, I’m a paladin. Let me talk to her, and I’ll heal her up as payment. That sound fair?”Nora went completely still, and a thrill raced through Allie. “You can help her?” Nora asked.

“I’m out of miracles for the month, but as long as I don’t have to undo any major curses or regrow any limbs then yeah, I’ll fix her shit.”

“You heal her first, then we talk. I don’t want you backing out if you don’t like what she has to say.”

“Yeah, fine sure. Shit, just take me to her already.”

“Wait here.” Nora slammed the door shut before the woman could respond, then turned to look at Allie. “I’m not sure we can afford to pass this up.”

Her heart hammering in her chest, Allie nodded. “I agree.”

She took a breath, then opened the door again. “We’ve only got one chair, so we’ll take the bed.”

“Wait, fuck, she’s here? Finally some good fucking news.”

Nora walked over to grab the single wooden chair that was normally tucked against the desk next to the wardrobe and hauled it over to the bed. Behind her walked a girl who stood as tall as Allie. She had short cropped dark hair and eyes nearly the same shade of brown, and she wore clothes that were plain, yet clearly high quality. Her pants alone might have cost as much as their apartment did for a month. Her eyes shot immediately to where Allie sat, then to the sword in her hand, and she grinned. A shit-eating grin that said she wouldn’t mind too much if Allie wanted to go a few rounds.

She took the chair from Nora, who sat down on the bed and wrapped her arm protectively around Allie. “Allie fought the beast longer than any of us. If you want to know about it, she’s the one to ask. But healing first.”The woman waved her hand dismissively. “Yeah, yeah. I’m Kat, now show me the injury so we can get on with this.”

Trying not to feel ridiculous, Allie pulled her collar down far enough to show the thin white scar just above her breast. Kat’s brows rose. “Seriously? That’s it?”

“He used some kind of cursed dagger,” Allie said defensively.

Kat’s brow furrowed. “The monster?”

“No, not the monster! The man controlling it!”

Her eyes widened a fraction, and Allie winced. She’d given that away for free, it seemed. “Fair enough, I guess. Let’s see what we’re working with.”

She put her palm to the injury and Allie felt magic flowing from Kat into her. It was warm for a second, then her gut clenched. Painfully. The rest of her body followed suit. She cried out and doubled over as memories assailed her. Her head exploding in agony as she was backhanded. Hands roughly mauling her breast with no regard to her pain. A large, iron grip on the back of her neck, shoving her face against the wall while she cried and begged him to stop.

Allie lunged for the bucket she kept near the bed and vomited into it, suddenly glad she’d never gotten the chance to eat the food Nora had brought her. She jammed her eyes shut and heaved with her whole body, fighting to stay in the present. Fighting to push back the memories worse than anything she’d experienced so far. She clutched the bucket so tightly it started to bend. She felt Nora’s arms wrap around her and realized she was trembling from the pain of the memories.

“What the fuck?” Kat demanded from the floor. Allie hadn’t touched her, so Nora must have shoved her back when Allie cried out.

Allie clutched the bucket with one hand while she wiped her mouth with her other. “You’re a Chosen.” The accusation slipped out with more vitriol than Allie had ever felt in her life. She felt a hatred that made no sense to her. The memory had been too painful—too fragmented—for her to understand it fully, but she’d gotten the gist.

Kat frowned. “That’s the second time someone’s reacted like that this week.” She shook her head and stood, then crouched in front of Allie, who clutched the bucket to her chest if only to fight against the sudden instinct to strike the woman. Nora pulled Allie closer, protectively putting herself between them.

“Calm your tits, big girl. I’m not gonna hurt your girlfriend.” Kat’s eyes glowed gold, and she widened. “What the fuck? Who the shit are you?”

Allie shook her head. “I don’t know what you’re asking.”

Kat stood and crossed her arms, her hand on her chin. “You’re leaking divinity. Not enough to be a Chosen or godspawn or anything like that, but a god’s magic touched you at some point in your life.” She straightened, thumbing her chin in thought. “The knife you got stabbed with. Describe it to me.”

Allie fought down her revulsion. Whatever the memories that had attacked her were, they had nothing to do with the woman in front of her. If she could help stop these episodes, then Allie could bear it. She racked her brain and recalled it aloud. While she did, Kat pulled a notebook and a charcoal pencil out and started scribbling.

“This the fucker?” she asked, flipping her notebook around.

Allie’s gut twisted. It was a perfect rendition of the slim crystal dagger. The only thing it needed was the sickly green color. She nodded, and Kat cursed. “That’s bad. It got stolen a couple months ago along with some other artifacts. Me and some of the other Chosen got put on the case, but we only managed to recover about half of them.” She stood. “It’s a knife capable of cutting into your soul. According to the scribes in charge of the vault in question, its owner can read the damage and learn things about you if they know how.”

“He knew my class after he cut me. Not just what its type, but its name. From the way he talked, it sounded like that wasn’t all.”

Kat started pacing. “I don’t know dick about soul damage. It’s really fucking rare, and skills to heal it even more so. I’ll ask around, but it might take some time. I know it can heal over time, but there’s all kinds of shit that can affect if it does and how fast it happens.” She grimaced.

“Your god. Who is he?” Allie forced herself to ask.

Kat eyed her with a caution Allie didn’t understand. “Tydarr.”

She racked her brain. War and honor, right? “If you give me your word you’ll help me, I’ll tell you what you want to know.”

Kat relaxed. “Then fuck yeah. You help me with this shit and I’ll be your best goddamn friend. I’m tired of running around doing research. I want to get back to the others and do some actual fucking fighting.”

A part of Allie rejected the idea of befriending a Chosen violently, but she shoved it down and forced herself to stand. She’d barely started before Nora wrapped around her and lifted her to her feet, then helped her sit down on the bed. If her legs weren’t so wobbly underneath her, Allie might have been annoyed. As it was, Nora’s presence was the only thing keeping her from breaking down.

“Why are you here? Searching for information, I mean. A paladin of a war god seems like an odd choice for that.”

Kat scoffed. “[Divine Sense] and a skill that makes me hard to lie to. Now,” she flipped to a different page and turned her book around, “is this the thing that you fought?”

Allie’s breath caught in her throat. Whoever Kat was, she was a good artist. She’d drawn a damn close rendition of the thing that had attacked her party. There were some glaring issues. “The face and body are right, but the legs aren’t. The one that got away from us had wings, not this second set of arms here. And it had a tail. One that could shoot spikes.”

Kat cursed again. “It’s not wrong. I drew this firsthand. There must be different types. What a pain in my ass. Tell me everything about the fight from start to finish. Every little detail you remember.”

Allie did. Kat didn’t interrupt, but her charcoal pencil never stopped furiously scribbling. Once Allie finished, Kat started with the questions. What color the wings were. How long was the tail? Was Allie absolutely sure the thing had been intelligent? Every so often she flipped it around and Allie had her make adjustments. By the time they were done, Kat had made a near perfect image of the Malek that had attacked her. That’s what the man had called it, and she told Kat as much.

She was particularly interested in the man. She asked multiple times and in different ways about the whistles and how many he used. She had Allie describe the man as well, and before long she had a rough sketch of his face. Only after she’d committed it to paper did Allie realize the man’s features were similar to the one’s from her dream. The tall scary one who’d killed Hannah. That realization also made her gut twist. By the time Kat seemed satisfied, Allie felt nauseous.

“Right,” Kat said, snapping her book shut and closing it. “That should get me a little slack, so I’ll have time to look into your soul shit. One last thing, show me that skill of yours? The one that made the Malek retreat.”Nora growled, but Allie just patted her arm. She drew her blade and cast [Sword of Night]. The shadows wrapped around her blade and she twirled it around, enjoying the afterimages it left behind.

“Yeah, okay, that shit is trippy. It also looks like—” She paled, then shook her head. “Never mind. Once I get your shit fixed, I want to see that in action. Might give us an edge if we understand why it fucked with the Malek. Till then, don’t go anywhere. I don’t want to have to go traipsing through the countryside looking for you.”

Nora crossed her arms. She’d been silent for most of the interrogation, but her hand constantly massaging Allie’s back had been the only thing to make it bearable. “Some of us don’t have the luxury of getting to take time off. We don’t get to have all our things paid for. We need to do jobs if we want to afford things like food and a roof over our head.”

Kat looked away. “Fuck. Why is it that everyone either scrapes and bows before us Chosen or hates our guts for it?” She sighed, then fished a sack of coin out of her pocket and tossed it on the bed. “There. Consider it a down payment. Till I get you squared away and learn more about your skill, you’re contracted by me. Fair?”Allie picked the coin up and her eyes bulged. She took a peek to confirm and realized that it was full of gold coins, not silver. “Now I’m worried what you expect us to do for all this.”

Kat just shrugged. “Fuck if I know, it isn’t my money. This is what they get for sending me to do fucking busy work. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a nice boring report to write up that I’m not looking forward to. I’ll let you to get back to whatever frisky shit I interrupted.”

She turned and let herself out with a brusque farewell, and Nora made sure to lock the door behind her. Once that was done she immediately swept Allie up in her arms and kissed her forehead. “You experienced another memory, didn’t you?” she said after.

Allie just nodded and rested her head on Nora’s shoulder, which was at the perfect height to do so. “Yeah. It was bad, too. More than one, I think. It was hard to tell.”

Nora cradled her gently. “I’d like to know about them. Your visions. Maybe an outside perspective can help you make sense of them.”

That sounded heavenly. Trying to figure them all out on her own had Allie at her wit’s end. “Alright, but not tonight please. That last one… It was the worst one so far. I think I was older. Old enough to—” she didn’t finish the thought.

Nora just tilted her back and scooped her up in her arms. “You don’t need to say any more.” Allie clutched her neck while the bigger woman carried her easily. She looked down at Allie, suddenly uncertain. “This is okay, right? You want this?”

Allie nuzzled into her neck. “I want this more than I realized, though I’m sorry to say I don’t think I’m in the mood to do much more than some cuddling right now.”

Nora set Allie on the bed and slid in behind her. The room was already darkening as the sun set outside, but Nora made no move to light any candles. “A night spent cuddling with you is still in line to be one of the best nights of my life.”

Allie wrapped herself in Nora and buried her face in the fighter’s amble bosom. It made her feel slightly like a child, but after the week she’d had she simply did not care. “We’ll have to get on changing that starting tomorrow.”