Chapter 80: In Which, Despite My Tendencies, I Do Not Follow An Order

"Sasha has been acting really weird. Can you talk to her for me?" I was kneeling by Princess Asperia's bed, and she was doing the stiffest lazing around I had ever seen on it-- I knew she couldn't rest on a pile of treasure like the previous Princess Asperia. I tried to remind myself I have to remember there was only one Princess Asperia, even if that wasn't true... but she looked so awkward lying there. She knew it wasn't her throne, either. She was just a bedwarmer.

Thronewarmer?

Well, in this case the throne was a bed, so... bedwarmer, sure.

"Are you listening, Eve?"

I focused my eyes back on her. I was going off on tangents because I was really really afraid of what seeing Sasha would be like. It couldn't be good, but I could hardly say no, if I wanted to keep Sasha alive.

And I did, I was like, ninety-five percent sure of that. The vast majority of my being yearned for her, there was this little recalcitrant part of my mind which was like "maybe Sasha is trouble" and "maybe you can't trust her" and "maybe she's volatile as heck" and "maybe the reason you love her is because she's used mind magic and manipulation until you've lost most of your original self."

"...sorry. I'll talk to her, I'm just scared. I don't want to make this whole situation harder for you, or her, or....." I looked up at Princess Asperia. "Will you be there with me for it?"

Princess Asperia nodded after a moment. "I suppose I might as well." She didn't want to either.

The two of us walked down in silence to the dungeons, in somber silence, except, nervous as I was, I couldn't help giggling when Warden sniffed rather enthusiastically at my underarms and it tickled.

Warden smiled at my reaction, and Princess Asperia let out a soft sigh, as if she was disappointed that the tension was cut by something so... prosaic? Was that the word? It felt just a shade of meaning off. Eve would know. I missed not having her in my mind to correct my mistakes.

Warden walked us down the maze of cells. "She hasn't been eating, not really. Drinking a little water. Not enough of either that she's starving herself on purpose, I think, just imprisoned people lose their will to live, sometimes-- I've never seen it go out of someone so fast." She was pretty relaxed about it. "She was so eager to save other people, but not herself, I guess."

"...yes, I imagine." I was pretty sure Warden was talking about me, who inhabited Sasha's body before.

"I think she's really loyal, in her own way, just she's an idiot, you know?"

"...I can't disagree with that." Either about Mistress Eve or myself, really.

Princess Asperia patted Warden's head and smiled at her. "Thank you for the information, Warden." Her voice was filled with affection, but Warden looked at her just a little worriedly as her tail wagged just a bit-- she could tell something was off in our Princess's behavior, even if she thought it was the same person from the scent.

Assuming Warden wasn't in on it, but I did kind of assume that.

Warden opened the cell door, and we walked in.

It was a relatively nice room. Sasha was kneeling on the rug, and as we entered, she immediately bowed down and touched her forehead to the floor. "I am not worthy, Princess."

"...Undoubtedly you aren't, but you don't need to do that every time," responded Princess Asperia casually.

I stood there awkwardly. Sasha rose back into a kneeling position, but she didn't look at me at all.

Princess Asperia waved her hand. "You two can talk, I'm just a chaperone."

"You are too magnanimous for words, Princess." Sasha looked over me, and her face was more or less blank. I walked over to her and knelt in front of her, and reached out to take her hands, which trembled softly in mine.

She leaned in close and rested her forehead on my shoulder. "Can I ask you something?" Her voice was barely audible.

I petted her head. "Mmm, yes, you're being a good girl, right?" It felt so weird treating my own body like she was my pet, but not entirely bad-- the bad part was everything around that.

"Take my chin with one hand, and rest your other hand on my shoulder."

I complied with her whisper, tilting my head a bit to one side.

"Now twist your right hand very quickly to the right, and push back on my shoulder with your left."

My body started to move just the slightest bit, used to obeying my Mistress as I was, until I realized exactly what she was commanding me to do.

I wrapped her arms around her shoulders, and hugged her close, gently, paying attention to the stupid amount of strength I had in this body. "I'm not going to fucking kill you, Sasha!"

Sasha sighed softly. "You should have." She looked over to Princess Asperia. "Wouldn't it make a good display of loyalty and increase the odds of our Princess forgiving her? There's not really any way this doesn't end in my death, after all."

Princess Asperia looked away. "When you were acting utterly obedient and without drive, I didn't expect this to be your plan, Sasha." She closed her eyes for a moment. "Everyone's so eager to throw their lives away. There's somewhere between having power and being miserable, you know."

"Am I going to be allowed to live freely by Mistress Eve's side as her slave?" Sasha's voice bordered on amused. "That can't be right."

I looked over to Princess Asperia, who was studying the ceiling tiles. "I can't promise that," she replied faintly.

"Then just kill me and tell everyone Mistress Eve did it. It'd be the kinder thing for everyone involved."

I growled. "I'm not going to let you sacrifice yourself."

Princess Asperia was silent for a long moment. "I'll be honest-- I don't like watching people sacrifice themselves. I'd like to let you two go free, but you're just going to come back and attack again, aren't you?"

"Of course not," I said immediately.

"Would you trust anything I said right now?" asked Mistress Sasha in the same breath. "If you do, certainly-- give me back to Eve, and I can promise you you'll never see either of us again. I'll even get rid of the little Seer you've been worrying so much about. The Princess has to get rid of slavery, so while it's not as dynamic as I'd like, I can trust her to do that, even if I can't trust her to take care of my--" Sasha paused, perhaps wasn't sure quite what I was to her, but after a moment she continued "--my most important person."

I stared up at Princess Asperia. "You trusted our Princess with Velt, and look what happened to her. You need to get rid of Princess Adeline, especially in Princess Asperia's currently weak state."

"Her currently weak state," said Princess Asperia, with so much acid in her voice it sounded like she was about to choke, "is entirely your fault."

Mistress Sasha shrugged. "Then kill me, and so make it so my Sasha doesn't look so disloyal. You can't really afford to keep me around, can you?"

"If I was smart," said Princess Asperia softly, "I'd have both of you killed. But I owe you, Sasha." She was silent for a long moment, and so were we.

Finally, Princess Asperia spoke up again. "So: I'm not going to hand control of Sasha back to you, because that could get out of hand, but you two are welcome to leave right now. I couldn't really stop you if you tried to leave, Eve, not without losing a lot of people."

"I don't want to kill a lot of people," I responded softly. "Much less members of the Harem. But I'll take your offer, my Princess." I disengaged from the hug with Sasha and kneeled in front of her, taking Princess Asperia's hand, and kissed it, looked up into her eyes, my own eyes getting a little teary. "I'll miss you." I'm sure I'd miss Princess Asperia, but right now, I was focused on how much I'd miss Ava.

She petted my head. Her eyes had unshed tears too. "I'll miss you too, Sasha. I'll send Valentine with you, you could use the help and talk has been going around about questions of her loyalty. Not safe to have right now."

"Are you going to be okay, letting all these purportedly not very loyal people go?"

Ava -- that is, Princess Asperia -- smiled. "Well, if they choose someone else to fill my shoes... long live the queen."

That was not entirely reassuring.

Sasha took my hand -- she had gotten up when I was paying attention to Ava, I guess -- and guided me back up to my feet. "Well, if we're going to do this, we shouldn't wait."

The door opened and Warden peeked in. "You didn't say not to listen in. You really should when you mean for me not to listen in, by the way. But I do know a good way out of here."

Princess Asp raised an eyebrow. "You have escape routes planned?"

Warden stared up at her blankly, unblinkingly. "I know every security flaw in my dungeon, my Princess, and all of them haven't been fixed. Did you read my report?"

Princess Asperia smiled. "I was just told the highlights... I guess I'll have to read it myself, if my good dog has made such a thorough document. But yes, guide these two out, I'll send along Valentine in a moment." She started walking away, and I reached out my hand a little, it felt like I should say something, but I didn't know what...

...and then she was gone.

My other hand was held by Sasha. She slowly exhaled, looked up at me, and gave me a cautious little smile.

I squeezed her hand gently.

Maybe this'd all work out?