Chapter 44: In Which Valentine And I — Both Naked — Ponder If Princess Adeline Can Be Saved

On the ride back, I stared out the window, pondering if there were any other paths that didn't lead to one of the princess's deaths.

Mist began to form inside the carriage, my eyes flittering around for any sign of danger.

Nothing obvious. My eyes focused on Sasha, as I realized she was staring up at me with a slight frown on her face... probably a spell she had cast. The cloaking one that let us talk?

"Are they watching us?"

"Probably. You're thinking of someway to save Princess Adeline, aren't you?"

I looked away. "...maybe a little bit. Well, I'm trying-- nothing has come of it so far."

She shook her head and climbed into my lap again, kneeling up on me so she was just a bit taller and looking down into my eyes as she took my chin and redirected my head at her, not that I struggled against it. "This is why I said you'd be happier without thinking about such things."

I rolled my eyes. "You had your chance to make me utterly helpless and dependent and happy, and that didn't go very well. Nor did your attempt with Wren, from the looks of things."

She growled softly, staring down at me, and I shrank back slightly. Logically, I probably shouldn't be afraid, but I had been utterly at her mercy any number of times, and I was afraid of hurting her in this body, too.

She slid out of my lap, and shrugged. "I guess you're right, unfortunately. I just don't want you to feel responsible and see you torture yourself with impossible ideas of how to make everyone happy and survive."

I grinned and stroked her head. "Why, would you be jealous?"

"...a little, yeah." She looked back up at me. "Actually, could I torture you sometime? I heard you tortured Valentine a little, with her okay, and... can I torture you sometime?" Her words were hesitant, but her eyes glimmered with a bit of hope. It was cute.

"...how about I torture you?"

She pursed her lips, then nodded, smiling up at me. "Okay."

"I don't actually want to torture you..." and her face fell. Ugh. "What's all of this about torture all of the sudden?"

She turned and slid her hand into the top of my dress, gently rubbing my breast. "Well, if we have some sort of other special connection no one else has besides sex, I theorize maybe it'll be easier to not be jealous about sex."

"That makes some amount of sense... I don't think I'd enjoy it, though."

She tweaked my nipple softly and smiled up at me flirtatiously. "Don't say that before you try it. You can use one of your... safewords, was it. Red to stop, green to keep going, yellow to slow down?"

...why was my brain processing this as cute? I really didn't like pain. "Yeah, you got it." I scritched softly behind her ear. "I'll think about it."

She sighed and flopped into my lap, the mist dissipating. I petted her head and back and massaged her shoulders a little on our return trip to Princess Asperia's wing of the castle. I just wanted her to be relaxed and happy and secure, why did that have to involve torturing me?

Once we got back to the harem, Eve gave me back my body-- that is, the body that was called Sasha. She said she'd report to Princess Asperia, and I said I needed to do some research. She looked at me for a moment, intrigued, perhaps, but then nodded and said she could report alone.

I searched down Valentine, and seeing she was in one of the baths, and, surprisingly, alone, pulled off my dress and slid in next to her.

Valentine smiled down at me and petted my head softly, getting my hair kind of wet, though I didn't mind. "How'd the trip go?"

"...poorly. How's the research going?"

Valentine shrugged. "I dunno, I'm not smart enough for that kinda thing." She studied my face for a moment. "You came to me to ask something else."

I felt my face and body heat up... probably just because of the hot baths were getting to me, okay, I was a little embarrassed too, but mostly the baths compounding it. "Um... why do you like getting tortured, Val?"

She thought about this for the moment. "I really enjoy the vulnerability and surrender, I guess? When I'm in combat, I'm almost always the person who's deciding how much myself and the other person get hurt... it's nice to switch the dynamic around. And... well, afterward getting hurt, it feels really good?"

"...ah." I stared into space for a moment, trying to imagine letting Eve do that to me. "...Well, um, thanks."

Valentine grinned and leaned in closer until her lips were almost pressed against my ear. "Thinking of trying it out yourself?"

"...well... Eve was thinking it'd be nice if we had a special activity between the two of us that wasn't sex, so she didn't feel as jealous about the sex stuff."

"Oh, that's probably smart." Valentine considered this for a moment. "I think she also likes hurting people, though." There was no judgement in her voice.

"Well... yeah. The question is if I'd enjoy it. And if I don't, will she feel disappointed?"

"I mean, I could torture you a little and see." Valentine gently tickled my stomach and I tried to push her hand away, giggling and doubling over a little. "No, obviously, if this is an activity she'd get jealous about...!"

Valentine withdrew her hand and petted my head. "The relationship between you two is really precious to you, huh?"

"...maybe? I also think, well, it's the best I'm gonna get?"

Valentine tilted her head curiously and stared down at me.

"Well, um, I definitely can't bring myself to kill her, and I don't think she's going to accept us not being together... so the best I can do is give in to her under my terms so I still have a little bit of power in the relationship."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense... wait, so if she's trying not to be jealous about sex anymore, that means we can fuck whenever, right?" Valentine hand slid down under the water and along my thigh, her hands tracing just a little bit stronger than usual, maybe to contrast with the pressure of the water better.

I bapped her lightly on the nose. "Not right now."

She blinked, then smiled easily, withdrawing her hand. "Okay. Anything else you need advice about?"

"Um..." I glanced around the room to see how many other people were maybe listening, and she pressed her lips against mine and kissed me deeply. "Yeah, let's get somewhere more private first, cutie." She picked me up and walked both of us over, wet and naked, to the mirror sex room she had taken me to before, where she handed me a towel and we both dried off-- well, with her huge size and thick hair, it took her a couple of towels to mostly dry off.

"So, what is it you want to talk about?"

"I... feel bad for Princess Adeline, and Eve thought that I was, I don't know, wrong to feel like that?"

"Feelings aren't right or wrong, they're just y'know, things. But also I don't think there's anything wrong with having compassion for others. Why do you feel bad for her?"

"It feels like she's stuck, absolutely trapped by the very futures her visions bring her... and also, what if she's right?"

"Right about what?"

"There being more misery if we get Princess Asperia in charge to try to fix things."

Valentine smiled and shook her head. "I have faith in her. Her heart is in the right place."

...right, Valentine was a fanatical devotee to her Goddess, she wasn't exactly going to think Asperia was going to do something wrong.

"Just like I have faith in you," continued Valentine.

I blinked, and looked up at her.

"Look, your plans might not always be great, unlike her, and you often try to exceed your grasp... but I admire how much empathy you have for others. I think the way you saved me back then was daring and beautiful and adorable, and you continue to be those things."

"Um, well..." I did not know how to respond to this, my mind was a jumble. "...thanks?"

She leaned down and kissed my brow. "I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to find out other ways to save Princess Adeline, as long as you run them by Princess Asperia first. Don't forget, she's not the only person you want to be happy and alive in the future."

"...Ah, yeah." I shook my head a little. "There must be something I could say...."

"Or if you can find out her greatest weakness and grab ahold of it, that also might work."

I blinked, looking up at Valentine. "...I really expected that kinda talk from Princess or Mistress, not you."

She shrugged, spreading out her hands. "And yet the road is still there." ...what did that idiom mean again? "People tend to find talking more agreeable when they have a blade against their throat."

"...you have been talking to Princess."

Valentine laughed. "I have. Is that such a bad thing, to influence each other's ideas?"

"I... I guess not. She was open to trying out my idea too, even though it turned out to be a bad one."

Valentine petted my head. "It's a bit early to say it was a bad idea, isn't it? Two days or a month from now, your conversation could make Princess Adeline rethink something."

"...if she's still alive."

"If she's still alive, sure. We're all in the circumstances we're in, and we can only do the best with it that we can."

"...that's true. I'll try to remember that. Thanks, Val." I hugged her, and she hugged me back.

...this, of course, reminded me of the fact that we were both still very naked, and I started to get a little aroused, so I sputtered something and ran back to the baths to get my dress.

I could hear Val's gentle laughter as I ran off.