Entry 41: What Would I Be?

Stewing in his morally corrupt thoughts, Samuel was suddenly brought out of his indulgent fantastical scenarios when he heard a familiar grating of metal against metal. Recalling the fact that his sister had been out since the morning, he only just remembered that she’d probably gotten back home.

“Oh, shit.”

There was just one issue: the massive fucking boner he was sporting that he could barely hide within his track bottoms. And it was now much too late to make a run for it up the stairs, as Faith had already stepped into the hallway. Should Samuel make a break for it now, the younger sibling would be in full view of the young adult and his annoyingly-erect schlong.

Looking for a way out that didn’t involve having to frantically run around, he hurriedly plastered himself up against the edge of the sofa, while unscrupulously extending his arms to Grace’s lower back so that the position didn’t look too awkward and to emphasise the normalcy of the situation.

“Oh, hey Bree.” Turning his back on the recipient of his handiwork, Samuel greeted the dark-haired beauty that had just entered the room and searched around the living area.

Her gaze briefly stopped on the lying figure below Samuel. Upon noticing that she was fast asleep, she curiously looked at what Samuel was doing to find his hands massaging his mother. She didn’t find anything strange about the situation, however, as she could distinctly recall Samuel having done so a few days prior. It just appeared quite odd that he was leaning in so close while slightly hunched over her, but she put it down to her brother trying to reach further in.

“Hey… Samuel.” She replied, rather awkwardly at that. The ‘warning’ she had issued a few days prior had made her feel ill at ease, and she couldn’t help but feel annoyed at herself for deceiving her brother. But when she recalled how distant and closed off he had become over the past few years, her heart became cold once more, as she assured herself that she was doing the best thing for him.

“How was hanging out with your friends? Have you eaten yet? Should I prepare lunch for you, sis?” He asked indulgently, causing the inner turmoil within her to bubble up again.

She felt that he was acting differently. So, so… very different. As though he’d never even distanced himself from her in the first place. In the young girl’s heart, she couldn’t help but feel the situation was strange. As though he was trying to get close to her. As though he was trying to reform the bond with her once more.

And such a strangeness made her feel stifled and her mood even worse so. Hadn’t Samuel been the one to break off their close relationship? Wasn’t Samuel the one to box himself off? What right did he have to try and piece things together again as if nothing had ever gone wrong in their relationship?

Even though Faith took it upon herself to help out her brother by befriending his bullies and drawing their attention away from him, why the fuck was he belittling her efforts by suddenly changing? He didn’t need to understand why she was doing what she was doing… but why did he have to make things so much harder for her?

“Bree?” Her nickname; The name only her mother and brother used to refer to her. It was a shorthand for her middle name- Brianna- which was the given name of Grace’s mother.

When Grace’s parents passed away, she had still been pregnant with Faith. And it had hurt their mother deeply when her parents had died while their relationship with their only child was still on the rocks because of what she now considered small issues. Her parents had been her everything, and yet they died at a time when she resolved herself to be hostile towards them.

Such a sentiment was why the woman had given Faith the middle name that belonged to her mother, as a token of remembrance to treasure family ties.

“Bree? Bree? Hellooo?”

Quite ironically, however, the name was once again involved in matters of distant family relations, as it was having to be called out several times by Samuel who tried to grab the attention of the teenager who was lost in thought.

“Bree!”

At Samuel’s raised voice, the girl jumped with a start as she was broken out of her stupor. Her cheeks coloured red when she realised that she’d just been daydreaming while still in a conversation with her brother.

“Uh…?”

“I asked if you’d eaten. There’s still some leftover lunch. And mum made it this time.” He pointed out, as he wondered if she’d be more receptive to eating their mother’s meals as opposed to his. In the past week, either she would take up her dinner that Samuel prepared to her bedroom, or into the living room if the duo of mother and son were in the kitchen, explicitly avoiding Samuel.

Their mother had naturally noticed the strenuous relationship between the two and had implicitly egged Samuel into doing something about it, to which he replied positively while assuring her that he had it covered.

“Oh… no. I’m fine. I’ve already eaten, thanks.” She answered perfunctorily, before making a quick getaway. She wanted some time to sort through her thoughts which were in a mess.

“Phew.” He didn’t bother to hold her back as he watched her leave before the young adult finally pulled his body away from the sofa. His raging boner had mostly calmed down by now, leaving him only semi-erect. His short exchange with his sister was confusing, to say the least, but at least she was expressing some more emotions.

Samuel was taking the renewal of the sibling relationship slowly- buttering her up before he’d come in with a bang eventually so that she couldn’t help but accept their relationship as real siblings once more. But he could distinctly tell the girl held a slight derision for him- especially considering how slovenly he had gotten as an individual which made her lack confidence in his ability as a man. So he would inadvertently have to prove the fact that he could fend for himself against the bullies.

Putting aside those thoughts, Samuel decided that’d be it for the massage. Since his mother was asleep and he wanted to keep a hold of his sanity, Samuel buggered off to his room to prepare for his [Fast Track] research.

— — —

~Sunday, 4.30 pm

Breathing heavily on the floor of his bedroom - where the bed was made- Samuel contemplated whether he should just work on making his own muscle gains and fat losses slowly, rather than have the system issue rewards in the same manner. Because the process of having these changes made to his body just now, had sent tingling shockwaves through him, as his body’s cells fired wave after wave of electrical signals to his brain as though panicking about the newfound losses and gains.

Indeed, Samuel had finally completed his second mission. He’d eaten into a portion of his loaned amount, which he had set aside for trading because he was planning to begin some form of training. And he surmised it would probably be better for him if he began in a better form.

Admittedly, while he’d been set on putting aside the entire grand for his trading ventures and not squandering his borrowed wealth like a hot-blooded teen with little sense for the trap that was free money, he felt the 20 Polarian Dollars membership that would elicit the changes in his body before he exercised was a reasonable choice given the fact that it would be troublesome to have to get used to his ‘new body’ if he was to train anytime before completing the mission.

[Mission 2: Create a gym membership]

[Reward: -1% Body Fat, +1% Muscle Mass]

[Time limit: 1 month]

“Huff… system… huff… status, please…” He forced out while panting. He was currently alone as his mother had left for work a few minutes prior while his sister was unwinding from the outing in her bedroom.

Interestingly, Samuel’s previous self had ended up barricading the door in between his and his sister’s room two years ago as she’d walked into his room when she heard weird ‘schlick’ing noises. Unappreciative of the liberties she took, the young male who had then valued privacy above all else, had blocked off the entrance in a fit of anger, and had not since changed it back. Such a move was probably instrumental in furthering the sibling divide, as the pair had frequently used the doorway in the past even amidst their arguments.

[Displaying system panel]

[Name: Samuel Armaan]

[Age: 18]

[Sex: Male]

[Level: 5]

[Level 6 Threshold: 2565/5000 CSRP]

[Health: 93/100]

[Stamina: 97/100]

[Constitution:]

[Body Fat: 27% -> 26%]

[Muscle Mass: 31% -> 32%]

[Height: 5ft 10in]

[Weight: 108Kg]

[Penis Length: 6in]

[Penis Girth: 5in]

[Sperm Load: 2.5ml]

[Facial Features: 5/10 -> 6/10]

[Max Health: 5/10]

[Max Stamina: 6/10]

[SRP: 1385]

[Skills: Status Window (MAX), Pleasure Point (MAX), Mind Read (Level 3/3), Sexuality Switch (Level 2/3), Subspace (Level 1/3)]

[Competencies: Stock Trading (Average)]

[Missions Completed: 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 6)]

[Missions Pending: 1 (5)]

[Achievements: 3]

[Assets: 0.78 Polarian dollars, 980.00 PD Credit, 0% purchase PBG Credit Card, 3x Customisable Fake ID]

[Partners: Emily Cooper (Temporary), Mai Matsushita (Temporary), Grace Elizabeth Hayes (Intent)]

[Store]

[Consumables]

[Would Host like to view notifications?]

Observing the changes to his level and the consequent addition to his repertoire of skills, Samuel chose to get all the understanding out of the way in the free time he had before school began again tomorrow.

‘Yeah, go on. Subspace sounds neat. I can sort of imagine a Minecraft-esque inventory. Huh… I could probably get crazy rich by smuggling drugs across the border with an inventory like that, couldn’t I?’ He rubbed his chin in mock contemplation, not taking the idea seriously.

[Displaying notifications]

[Host has reached Level 5 threshold]

[Upgrading to Level 5]

[Congratulations! Host is now Level 5 and has received the skill Subspace (Level 1) and an upgrade to the skills Sexuality Switch (Level 2) and Mind Read (Level 3)]

[(New Skill!)]

[Subspace (Level 1/3)]

[Description: Storage of up to 25 non-living objects in a space pocket.]

[Sexuality Switch (Level 2/3)]

[Description: Be able to alter the rate of change of anyone’s primary and secondary sexual characteristics.]

[Mind Read (Level 3/3)]

[Description: Be able to see the emotions of any individual as a colourful aura around them. Can also directly read the inner thoughts of anyone, and the future thoughts of Host’s partners. Finally, Host can link Harem Partners to a Hive Mind, wherein Host can feel fluctuations in Partners’ thoughts and emotions, and communicate with them.]

[(New!)]

[Achievement Unlocked: Raunchy Resolve]

[Description: Host has resolved to give into your desires and pursue a socially taboo relationship.]

[Reward: 3x Customisable Fake ID]

[Customisable Fake ID]

[Description: Can will the ID Card to display any face and subsequent details to Host’s liking that will have a registered profile on databases at Host’s discretion. The card will expire soon after it has been used.]

[Partners Updated]

[Grace Elizabeth Hayes has become an Intended Partner]

[Grace Elizabeth Hayes]

[Obedience: 20/100]

[Favourability: 75/100]

[Lust: 4/100]

‘I have to be the most sinful human alive to have my mother as a ‘capture’ target. Haa… But, I think it’s prudent that I accept my unfilial desire for her now. Struggling to make my resolve will only lead to wishy-washy usage of the system on my end.’

Now that Samuel had accepted the reality of his heart, he realised that the coming year would present bountiful opportunities to court his own mother. And at this juncture, having accepted his incestuous desires, he could make full use of these opportunities- especially since he wasn’t too fond of using potions and other such mystical means to make her fall.

Moving on from the topic of his mother which still made Samuel feel slightly uncomfortable and rotten deep within his heart, he began to consider the huge change to the [Mind Read] skill.

‘Hive mind sounds really cool… but the only issue I have with it is that I’ll have to reveal some of the supernatural sides to my future partners which I don’t know how to feel about. I guess I could just link them and avoid communication until absolutely necessary. Well, I will see as I go.’

Since coming back to the past, Samuel had chosen to keep the fact that he had a system and that he was a regressor to himself. He’d even kept it a secret from his family who he planned to cherish in this life, and so it couldn’t be helped that he was on the fence about coming clean about having a supernatural entity in his head. He figured he could just reveal tidbits here and there if ever like occasionally reading someone’s mind, but such a circumstance was a long way away anyway. It wasn’t something he had to consider since none of his partners was a part of his Harem.

And while he had no plans to reveal he was a regressor to anyone, since if such a fact was revealed to outsiders he’d lose countless financial opportunities, he wasn’t exactly being subtle about the fact that he was a changed man. But he figured no one would ever consider his supernatural change to him being a time traveller since it was such an unthinkable concept, so he wasn’t too worried.

He put aside thoughts about the [Subspace] since it was a bit underwhelming. Though he was hopeful for good upgrades to it in the future, since Mind Read had evolved beyond his expectations.

However, he was quite a lot more excited about the [Sexuality Switch (Level 2)] upgrade. As far as he was aware, men tended to lose their libido over time, and now that the switch could affect primary sexual characteristics too, Samuel was assured that he could bestow upon those he didn’t like a pseudo-erectile dysfunction by accelerating their sexual decline. Though he didn’t plan to about doing so on an industrial scale, or again, unwanted attention would be drawn towards him.

Finally, however, it was time to address what Samuel was probably the most excited about- the Customisable Fake IDs. It had him a lot more eager to receive missions and hidden achievements going forward since he was aware that he could receive things besides potions and such as his rewards. Sure he knew that he had a store to purchase such items, but it was always nice to save SRP on free rewards.

‘Especially since with this, I can make my future plans more creative. And pairing it with the [Magic Mask] would make for a deadly combo!’

Realising the fact that the ID would have a registered profile on databases, it made the feasibility of use that much greater since he couldn’t be caught by ID scanners and the like (not that he was especially concerned about such an issue in 2007 anyway). But it also meant, provided he’d made an appearance change beforehand, any run-ins with the police wouldn’t be so detrimental to his criminal records.

And run-ins with the police would Samuel have, as the young adult pondered over his future trajectory. The world wasn’t a safe place to live in, and with how he would be making money quite rapidly if his plans bore fruit, he’d be getting into trouble with the wrong sort of crowd sooner or later. In fact, if he was to get revenge for his sister’s miseries of his past life, it was almost guaranteed that he’d have a run-in with gangs and organised crime groups eventually.

These unsocial groups weren’t such a problem in the capital Polaris, but in the large town Samuel lived in about 40km from Polaris, it had become a growing issue that had affected his sister’s livelihood. He also guessed the perpetrators of his mother’s death were involved in such groups too, but he wasn’t certain about that particular case.

Being a fat slob with nothing going for him in his previous life, Samuel was honestly frightened at the possibility of encountering such people in the future. And yet, with all the resources at hand, it was a no-brainer that he’d eventually deal with those organised crime groups sooner or later. He was no hero that intended to protect his town, but he would certainly be protecting the people around him with the aid of the system. If culling the weeds before they could wrap themselves around his family was the way to go, then so be it.

‘The fear… I’ve got to suck it up and deal with it. But this fear also makes life so much more valuable. Like it’s worth living. Like I have a purpose in life. And when I am to overcome my fears, I would feel empowered and changed. It’s not an emotion I felt much towards the end of my first life, sitting in my bedroom all day, besides at the point of death. And even death felt more exhilarating than the entirety of my first life.’

While pondering over the healthy benefits of fear on his goals, Samuel’s thoughts wandered to how instrumental the system was in relieving him of the fear of confronting those sorts of individuals, leading him to reflect on his situation.

‘Indeed. What would I even be without the system?’

— — — — — —