Chapter 149 – Double Check
Naruto wails out loud at how clueless everyone is to his plight. Normality had gone from a blessing to a curse! He looks down and sees that most of the skin on his right hand and a fair amount of his penis and balls had disappeared. Chakra tends to soak into the muscles and bones during the training of the Eight Gates technique, so the hand had been more resistant to disintegration than his genitals. “GRAAAAAHHHH.. Hinata! I need a medic!!”
Only after he draws her attention to it does Hinata seem to notice Naruto’s dire plight. She gasps and quickly rushes down to Naruto’s side. She almost trips on her pants, which are around her ankles, but recovers and squats down to provide some basic medical ninjutsu, a field of jutsus that utilize chakra in a way speeds up cell growth in a controllable manner. Too much chakra may cause cancerous elements to form, so it is a delicate field of study that beginners are specifically told to be very careful with.
Once Hinata moves, everyone else also follows her pussy in motion as she crouches. They finally notice that Naruto is bleeding out from his crotch and they awkwardly groan. It’s normal for such a thing to happen to Naruto, but it still triggers a visceral reaction of disgust deep down. Hinata can only really repair the edge of the damage, essentially cauterizing the bleeding openings, and wrapping them up with some cloth. None of them have enough skill to repair a set of penis and testicles with medical ninjutsu.
Azula finds it strange that the damage to Naruto’s crotch looks so similar to her Phoenix Dao attacks, then again, it would be normal for that idiot to approach her while she has her defenses up. Her Dao defenses are mostly for foreign projectile sneak attacks and for getting rid of pesky bugs. For her defenses to harm a slightly larger bug is no big deal, however adorable he can be at times.
Azula likes to keep a very tight lid on her personal space, especially in a foreign land with many means of surveillance like this one. She briefly wonders why she had not noticed his approach, but the thought floats away like a cloud. So despite feeling like there is something wrong with the current situation, Azula simply ignores the crying and groaning Naruto while Hinata finishes her treatment. The rest of the team does as well.
~ ~ ~
Naruto stares viciously at Azula. He cannot fathom how this happened. He knows that Azula is not pretending! The only thing he can imagine is that he had triggered some security seals, but who would put up security seals on such short notice to defend against their own teammates?! At that moment, he spots a fly approaching a meter of where Azula is sitting, whereby it silently disintegrates in a fraction of a second.
With eyes wide in horror, Naruto comes to the realization of what had happened. Azula has some innate ability or bloodline that autonomously protects her! Unless she specifically allows them in, anyone in close radius to her may be subject to slow disintegration. Gritting his teeth, Naruto complains inwardly as he stares at his crotch and hand with misery, ‘Fuck! That bitch is too overpowered! I can’t even have my way with Hinata injured like this even though I am allowed to. Why did I have to get revenge.. Damn it all!’
Wiping the last of the tears off his face, Naruto groans and says to Hinata, “Pull up your panties and pants. If you turn me on now, I’ll only be in pain.”
Hinata replies worriedly as she pulls up her pants, “Okay, darling. How about I bring you back to town to get treated?”
Naruto nods weakly and says, “Alright, let’s do that.”
Kakashi ignores him, but does reply to Hinata in a dry voice. “What are you talking about? It’s normal for Naruto to be injured. You cannot fail your first mission on his behalf.”
Naruto shouts, “I’m going to have sex with Hinata and I feel like doing it back in town! Any objections now?!”
“Hmm?” Kakashi mumbles, “Okay, then.”
“Alright, Hinata.” Naruto says, “Pick me up and take me back.”
While Hinata gently lifts him onto her back, Naruto says, “Thanks, Hinata. I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”
Hinata blushes and replies, “Of course, darling.”
Naruto begins to ponder, ‘I’m starting to get the hang of this Normality Ring. There’s all sorts of loopholes that I can find to get what I want, but in the end, the stronger babes like Azula are entirely off-limits for me until I become far stronger than I am now.. I should keep it safe for now and stick to girls my age or civilians.’
‘Back in town, I should be careful of mind readers. Granny Tsunade is one of the strongest, but she should not be wary enough of me to try anything. It’s better that I get healed by her, since she’s the best medic. I really cannot handle being crippled when I have full reigns on fucking Hinata whenever I want! That earlier exclamation I made that got me betrothed to Hinata had somehow changed the past, or at least the team’s perception of the past.’
“Hey Hinata, I’m having trouble with my memory after that horrible injury. Can you explain how we got betrothed?” asks Naruto with a terrible explanation.
Hinata looks at him curiously and says, “Sorry.. I should have told you that Azula-nee doesn’t like people to get close to her other than those she trusts. It went like this..”
Explaining how a progressive research team had found that their progeny would be very powerful, Hinata grows increasingly excited and accidentally bumps Naruto’s crotch onto her ass after a hard landing on the ground as they arrive at Konoha.
“Ow..” Naruto groans, “H-hurry and get me to Granny Tsunade.. The pain is coming back.”
Shoving the pain to the back of his mind, Naruto continues analyzing the Ring’s powers. ‘Somehow, the Ring had auto-generated a plausible backstory for why it is normal for me to fuck Hinata whenever I want! Incredible.. I wonder what else I can do with this. Could I make it so that it is normal for every girl to do whatever I say!?’
Naruto frantically attempts to shovel his chakra into the ring, but it still does not accept any of it. ‘Damn it. Is that a one-off thing or is it on some sort of cool-down?’
They soon arrive at the Hokage Tower, where Hinata is stopped for a search. Impatient and in pain, Naruto says, “I’m going to fuck Hinata in the Tower, there’s no need to search us.”
The guards go, “Ohh! Of course.” and clap Naruto on the back with encouragement as they let them pass freely.
The second set of guards are significantly more powerful, but there’s no one at the highest tier of power, like Hizashi, so Naruto is comfortable using the same trick on them. If any one of them has read his mind, he doesn’t know it, and neither do they kick up a fuss. Hinata goes upstairs and stops at the waiting room where there are several masked guards. Too afraid to utilize his loophole powers, Naruto lets out a groan and considers what to say to the receptionist to meet with Granny Tsunade.
This proves unnecessary, since Tsunade exits her office shortly after. Naruto already feels relief from his pain watching those massive jugs bounce hypnotically even from her regular gait. She grumbles in a cranky voice, “What’s going on? Why does it smell like blood here?” before she catches sight of Hinata carrying Naruto, who seems to be in pain.
Tsunade gives a stink-eye to the masked guards for letting the kids stick around instead of redirecting them to a hospital. She’s too busy with paperwork and drinking for nuisances like this to show up at her doorstep. Seeing that Naruto is a distant relative of hers though, she figures she might as well look at him so she grumbles, “Alright. Bring him into the office, Hinata.”
While Hinata carries Naruto into the office, Tsunade asks the receptionist once they are at a sufficient distance, “How did two kids end up in the Hokage Tower without an appointment?”
The lady receptionist looks at Tsunade while stifling a laugh. When Tsunade gets drunk, she can be very forgetful. The citizen chosen for being her secretary needs to be very good at managing schedules and fearless with regards to accidental death at the hands of Tsunade’s super strength when grumpy. She hasn’t actually killed anyone yet, but she’s gotten close by mangling a few girls’ limbs, which she quickly had to heal afterwards. Needless to say, the position pays splendidly.
The receptionist says, “Lady Hokage, it’s because those two have been betrothed and Naruto can have intercourse with Hinata whenever he wants. He must want to have it in your office.”
Tsunade blinks several times in confusion, then grabs the receptionist by the collar and pulls her like a ragdoll up to her face. “The fuck did you just say to me..?”
Normally fearless, the receptionist rapidly withers as she tries to incoherently explain herself, “L-l-l-ady Hokage.. It’s as I s-said. The Clan Restoration Act.. an exception has been made and voted for by the majority! P-please!”
Tsunade lets go of the receptionist, causing her to almost fall over the front of the counter. She ominously growls over at the ANBU, “Is she correct that some shitty brat, Naruto, can use my office for sex whenever he wants?”
The masked guards, also known as ANBU, are the personal troops of the Hokage. They are essentially the equivalent of the United States Secret Service from Earth-0, but with the added roles of assassination and spycraft all at the behest of whoever is Hokage at the time. As much as the ANBU guards present would rather not get on the bad side of the Hokage, they imagine they’d get in even more trouble if they lied, so they nod hesitantly.
Seeing even the ANBU confirm this fact, Tsunade loses her anger and gets serious. She had initially thought someone used illusions to brainwash her civilian receptionist and was wondering who had the gall to do that, but for an enemy or prankster to sink even her elite shinobi squad into illusions would be exceedingly difficult. ‘Did some old fogeys really pass some archaic motion for two kids to fuck around anywhere they want? They must have wanted to have a bit of fun, did they? Not in my city, humph. I’ll get to the bottom of this and show them.’
Tsunade figures she can find out more from the rapscallions themselves. She storms into her office and tries to lighten her mood as much as she can. Well, seeing Naruto’s crotch out of commission did do her wonders. Somehow, everyone had let them through even knowing that he cannot even have sex, though? Something about this scenario feels odd to her.
Tsunade chuckles and says, “So, little guy, how’d you get your groin and hand mangled so badly?” After she says that, she notices Naruto’s heart rate spikes dramatically. His aura radiates fear and.. regret? Tsunade easily picks up on these things since she is the best medic in town as well as an energybender with a basic read on the emotions of those with weaker spiritual bodies.
Marking Naruto as one of the primary suspects in her mind, she moves to Hinata. If Naruto is guilty, then Hinata might be his unsuspecting victim. She gently asks, “Hinata, lass. What happened to Naruto?”
By now, Naruto is sweating bullets. Tsunade is not supposed to notice him! She should be treating his injuries as normal! This is a catastrophic miscalculation! If only he hadn’t wanted the best possible treatment for his penis! He suspects that Tsunade is so strong that she is immune to the Normality Ring! To his abject horror, his newly christened slutty fiance, Hinata, diligently reveals everything. “He pulled his dick out in front of Azula and tried to fap next to her, but he got hurt somehow.”
Tsunade is momentarily dumbfounded that Hinata would reveal such a thing with such an innocent smile on her face. Subsequently, her anger spikes so high that Naruto and Hinata are flattened onto the sofa they are sitting on by spiritual pressure. She fumes internally, ‘This fucking illusionist is extremely skilled and perverted! He dares! Azula is a diligent futanari who always minds her own business and is a guest to this town!’
Hearing Naruto’s weak groan and noticing his wound reopen, Tsunade glares at him. She walks over to the sofa and looks down at him with her massive breasts pendulously swaying down, almost blocking his line of sight to her face. No longer putting on any pretenses, she demands, “Who is it? I know you’re an accomplice! Who’s the mastermind?!”
Naruto balks under the increasing pain and spiritual pressure, but he is determined to keep the Ring a secret. He groans out, “No.. one..”
With all her sensory abilities informing her that he is telling the truth, Tsunade releases him from most of the pressure and turns around to look out the window pane overlooking Konoha. Looking down at her town from above always has a way of calming her down. She is even more confused as to what is going on, but she has a bad feeling that she’ll kill this shitty kid if she’s the one to interrogate him. Thankfully, someone shows up to relieve her of this burden.
Hearing a knock on the door, Tsunade cannot be bothered with the formalities of using the receptionist when most everyone is partially brainwashed. She helplessly says, “Come in.”
Hearing no sound, she jumps a little when she sees that Orochimaru has soundlessly made his way next to the sofa and is observing Naruto with rapt attention. This guy always finds ways to creep her out, but it’s honestly a relief that he’s here. He must have found other brainwashing victims and tracked down Naruto to here.
If anyone can get to the bottom of this, it’s Orochimaru. Then again, she has a nagging sense that this topic is extremely important, so she absolutely cannot let him do this alone. She has to observe his interrogation and subsequent findings for reassurance that Orochimaru will not ‘pervert’ this brainwashing scheme for his own ends.
(A/N: Let me continue the chess analogy on poor little Naruto. First he blunders with Azula. Then, he gets checked by Tsunade. Now, he is double checked by Tsunade and Orochimaru!)