Chapter 16: Animal House
---D-Day+27, Nizhen 30th---
"What the hell is this?!"
Houston. We have a problem.
"Master?"
The astronomy tower on the south end of Kashiwa Hall, the biggest building in Stormgarde, is four stories tall. Above ground. It also reaches two stories below ground. The top two floors have the mechanisms for the big telescope. The rest? Is a library.
Four stories of books and scrolls. Of bookcases, windows, mirrors, chandeliers, tables, chairs, platforms, and elevated walkways. And that's just the public section.
Those two underground stories? Reach under the rest of Kashiwa Hall too. Gated off, those underground floors hold the archives of Stormgarde. Works and records not considered relevant, or okay, enough for students to view.
At least, thank god, Sayo introduced this world to the Dewey Decimal system. Or some version of it. Couldn't tell you the last time I was in a library.
I'm at the bottom of the tower with Frankie, Red, Blue, Silvie, plus dozens of shadows, scouring through those books and scrolls. Looking for any clues to peeping on someone in another world and creating new eggs in ovaries.
The former may lead me to who or what sent Ushi visions of my son. The later may show me how to restore Ushi's fertility.
Odaline and Simone, dumbette and dumberette, plus those dozen students from my first isekai rock concert? They started researching down here yesterday. Placing any interesting finds aside for me and my wives to check.
Of course just telling them what to look for gave them some pretty big clues to what I am. So if yesterday's concert wasn't enough? Being told what I need? Has given them a lot of new stuff to think about. Which is probably a good thing.
Summer break is normally when teachers and students rest, travel, prep, etc... But these fourteen are in a bad place right now. Like 'double secret probation' bad.
Turns out? Senior senior citizen? Dumped this black sheep squadron on me to keep them busy and away from the public eye. They've already been moved and are sharing one large house on campus.
Delta Tau Chi?
Why should I take responsibility for these brats? Yeah I exposed casanova but I don't recall making these upright uptight ladies and gentlemen take all that dick or force them to lie about it.
The only one I directly exposed was Simone. Odaline was 'engaged' to casanova. ... Ew. So that could be considered legitimate bridal training. Maybe. Sort of. Ew.
Simone's husband and kids have already split for his House's turf in Viermart. Yep, that 'heart of the church and inquisition' Viermart. So not only is she abandoned? If the inquisition gets their hands on her? She might very well be tortured and killed.
Well the higher you like to act? The farther you have to fall.
My ultimatum in the Grand Hall to lamer saruman has caused a huge mess. Casanova built a sex-slave ring that had grown to fourteen students and two teachers by the time I intervened.
Beyond the sex-slaves themselves? Were the who and how many customers they had. Especially the regulars. Twisted props to ex professor love but not all the victims were even charmed. Some were coerced thru blackmail or money.
Now, honestly, its not like these girls can't be brides now. Remember, the most important things for noble marriages is rank and mana. Virginity is important. Especially among the upper or more conservative families. Buts its not a deal breaker.
It is a deal changer though. For the students living on campus, especially girls, Stormgarde is considered their guardian. Their chaperone. So their Houses have to be notified if those girls aren't virgins anymore since it does impact marriage negotiations.
Yeah.
A few teachers have been let go. A dozen girls have had their prospects dramatically lowered. Two of the girls couldn't bear the shame and committed suicide.
Several families are demanding compensation from the academy while its scrambling to fill suddenly open positions before the new school year starts.
All because casanova pissed me the fuck off by using mind magic on me and my wives. Still don't feel a bit of guilt too. Huh. Have I always been like this?
See dumbette and dumberette chatting with my shadow oracles again, while they search thru books and scrolls.
And what is up with my Ferra and Margo getting all chummy with Odaline and Simone? What's this feeling? Kindred spirits? Oh yeah, duh, they were Metia's oracles. They were the church's sex-slaves.
Dammit. Stop getting sidetracked. Okay, where was I? Oh yeah.
"What the hell is this?!"
"Husband?"
While I'm going through a ton of old stuff, half of which my auto-translate doesn't work on? I'm also trying to pick courses for my freshman year. Holy crap there are a lot. Like a lot a lot. Thank god, as a researcher, I have more flexibility but still. Shit.
Studies, programs, classes, and courses? Numeral, Magical, Astral, Ventural, etc, etc... Cavum, Bellua, Divination, Virtures, Umbra, Rhetoric, etc, etc... I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, and IIX?
Isn't this like, way to complex for medieval land?
There are six class slots a day. Taking up like six eight-hours a day. Six days an eight-week. Four months per semester. Two semesters a year. For four years.
Yep. Can totally see an over achieving japanese high school girl coming up with this. A masochistic one.
I hated school. Like really hated it. And now I'm in the isekai version of one. You know, becoming a real savage northern marauder barbarian hermit recluse? Is sounding better and better.
Ugh.
"Master?"
"..." I may be crying, and drooling. Think my brain melted down around page one hundred of the school courses book.
"Eh? Ah." Red peeks over and sees what's in front of me. "Husband is looking at the curriculum. It is, hehe, intimidating."
"Oh? We didn't get a choice in Viermart. Our classes were assigned to us."
Frankie? I need sexual healing. Not witty banter!
"Not in the library, husband. We'll get all the scrolls and books wet."
Doomed. I'm doomed! Gir, start singing the Doom Song. Why is Odaline blushing? Oh, right, the sex slave thing. She probably got 'fluids' all over this place. A few times. Uh... Anyone got a wet-nap?
"Master!" Ouch! What's with the pinching?
This [See Thru Husbands Antics] cheat is getting out of hand! Really need to come up with a better name for it. Or a cool acronym like the fldsmdfr.
Calgon take me away.
"Viscount Barton."
Calgon, take me further away. A lot further.
"Rector Habriel. What brings you to my imminent doom."
Senior senior citizen, and nine distinguished looking academic types, come walking in from the Kashiwa Hall archives. Since Frosty is one of those nine I'm guessing that these are the Deans. Or ringwraiths. Though I don't think this is a PJ film, yet.
"Ah, yes. Curriculum. Some do find it rather challenging. I always considered it more of a hell spawned nightmare."
Oh come on. Even the guy in charge doesn't like it? What the hell man! Oh, yeah, most of these deans have not seen my living shadows before. They are handling it well. Not nervous, but definitely wary.
In between pounding my head on the table, hearing the doom song in that same head, and Simone smiling at me for some reason, I ask.
"So what brings your esteemed oldness to my table if not to laugh at my pain."
That ruffled some deanly robes.
"Ahem. Yes. You mentioned to Dean Frost that we needed to talk?" Lamer saruman says as Frosty curtsies. "Is this not an appropriate time?"
"Don't worry Onii-chan. I've sealed the library and archives." Smug loli pose? "No one will overhear us."
Seriously? I thought this would be more, private. The black sheep squadron is still here.
Fuck it.
"All right. Well, grab a seat. This will take a while."
Senior senior citizen instructs several students to take notes and asks if I mind. I don't.
Start off with the life I lived. Highlights of my family, home, nation, world, and its history. Keeping my name and age secret of course. Never liked birthdays anyway.
Then I cover the white room and angel tits. That I have three cheats. What cheats are. But only tell them about [Recovery Magic].
From there its about the monastery and camp. About killing the demons, meeting monocle and grizzly. Killing mustache. Ushi reacts strangely to that last part. Did I never tell her I killed the guy who drugged and raped her? Stole her virginity? Huh.
Thought I did.
Then on to the trip, meeting the necromancer, and discovering living shadows. On to Colrac, being classed as a Swordmage, the Vault, the Templar attack, and the death of my girls. Both Frankie and Red snuggle up to me.
Next arriving at Lions Keep and the elf bitch's plots. Including how she planned the breaking of Red's mom and some other schemes to isolate my knight-wife. Of course covered her execution too.
Finally finishing off with healing Blue. Sneaky's execution. Casanova's execution. And discovering that Sayo was probably not just from my world. But also from my time.
Do bring up parallel worlds and using names and history as ways to compare. The parallel worlds bit appears to blow a couple of the deans' minds.
Even include Ushi's suspicions that I was actually the target instead of my son. And why I might have been targeted. End of the world shit.
In the middle, butler and the maidettes appear. Making Frosty panic and double check her seals. Of course all are intact. Freaking [Butler Magic]. Somehow has enough food for everyone again. Seriously, is this guy isekai Jesus?
By the end, even at the bottom of the astronomy tower, I can tell the sun is starting to set.
Everyone is just staring at me. Well except for Frosty. Whose got that gleam in her eyes and randomly mumbles, 'really real.'
The Rector of Stormgarde Academy, on the other hand, is staring intensely. Maybe, he just fell asleep? A sleeping with your eyes open kind of thing? Or, maybe he's dead? He is like, super old. Super duper old. Super duper holy pooper-
"Viscount Barton." Oh, so, not dead. "Do you intend to destroy this world?"
"Well, you've got a pretty shitty planet here. Though mine can be just as bad in its own ways." Rub my sadly beardless chin. "I intend to keep my son safe. If that safety requires this world's death? Then, it will die."
"And if it does not?" Asks random dean guy.
"Then it won't. I need to deal with whoever put those visions in the oracle's head." Several Deans nod. "Otherwise, there is nothing to stop them from getting someone else to summon my son."
"What do you know about the Aquecian Heroes?" Asks random dean gal.
"Nothing much." Shrug my shoulders. "From their descriptions I suspect they are students from the same nation and time period as Sanriel. Though I could be completely wrong."
"..."
"Okay, I've told you almost everything. Your turn." That raises some eyebrows. "What do you want from me?"
The Rector finger combs his beard for a bit before finally answering.
"I agree that simplifying and learning your Recovery Magic would an achievement of the age. Unfortunately your power rivals the Sorcerer Kings of old. Making you remarkably valuable and dangerous." More deans nodding. "We came here to subjugate you if possible." Looks at shadows and students. "Unfortunately it seems I am already too late."
"Nah. I bet you could take me down." Lamer saruman looks stunned. "You and Frosty are the strongest I've sensed so far. Toss in the deans? Sure. Have more confidence in yourself."
"Tharick?" Loli looks worried. Yeah, I still want to fight him.
"Do not concern yourself Franziska." Senior senior citizen gives loli a sad look. "This one will not test our alliance. Yet, the fear that he will bring back the Wizard Wars is real." Several heads snap his way. "Though if Lady Ushinua is correct? A much more dire fate may be grasping for us."
"Yep. And if I'm going to be hunting gods? I need to get stronger."
Old guy runs his fingers through his hair. "Indeed. Very well Viscount Barton. Facilities will be prepared for your research and all portions of the library will be unsealed for your investigation." That's a win.
"Thank you."
"Welcome to Stormgarde Academy, Viscount Barton. Try not to destroy the world."