Volume 3 Epilogue: The Baochuan

---D-Day+111, Dherus 18th, Tuesday Morning---

---Near Raelera---

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Sigh…

“Jon?  Are you okay?”

Red rests her hand on my shoulder.

“Hmm?  Oh, no, it's okay, I’m fine.”

…

Sigh…

I’m in a carriage, one of fourteen, rolling down the road towards Raelera.  Where Little Li swears a ship is waiting to take us all to Yangxu.  Geesh, two months at sea.  Sure as shit hope this body doesn’t get seasick.

Frankie reaches over and squeezes my knee.

“Master?  Please tell us.”

Count ended up being about what I expected.  Harem-wise my wives Red, Frankie, Blue and Hitomi chose to follow.  And are in the carriage with me.

Concubines Lili, Oda and Sim asked to come too.  As did Mistresses Lula, Mel, and Big Ji.  They are in the carriage behind us.  Little Li and her entourage went ahead to get the ship ready.

The surprise ended up being the not-mistresses.  Clari, Milti, and Lizzy.  If you had asked me a couple of weeks ago?  Would have sworn they would stay.  Unfortunately, shit went south real fast.

Those three, with Agrag, are in the third carriage.

Figured at least a couple of the brat pack, casanova’s ex-sex-slaves, would ask to follow.  Nope, they all decided to go back to their families.  The few late joiners of Delta Tau Chi bailed too.

So much for Stormgarde’s first frat.

Frosty went to stay with family in Granya.  Silvie is going back again too.  And staying this time.  Turns out she really did find a guy.  We all wish her well.

Foxy was just a spy.  “Seducing" in exchange for the Guild paying me to heal her brother.  Well, he’s healed and back to one hundred percent.  So she’s following him to the Beastlands.

Mila joined the Redbrands.  And they are off on another expedition into the deep dark.  Her sister, and the other surviving children of the Jodu, have already found places in Lions Keep as pages and maids.

Val has her master’s dream so she’s staying.  Along with thousands of undead and hundreds of golems.  The inquisition will have a hell of a time trying to dig them out of Transylva.

And while I haven’t seen them lately?  The heinienesses Isa and Ymi, a bribe to me from their siblings, and their guardian Maty, tin can’s ex-naughty-roleplay mistress, weren’t even asked.

Have enough headaches to deal with, thank you very much.

Didn’t bother asking the various “one night stand” girls either.  Including Juli and Issa.  No matter how memorable those nights were?  They’ve all got their own lives and being associated with me?  Is not a good thing anymore.

The latest potential addition, Aurai Lianlaf, Baron Fred’s daughter, took the news that I was adiosing pretty well.  Just a “hmph” and refused to look at me again.

Weird kid.

My “cult” is going even more underground and will keep an eye on the nine women knocked up while I was knocked out.

Sadly, I've lost not-sebastian and the maidettes. According to the new baron, they serve House Lianlaf, not me.  Going to miss his [Butler Magic].

Fourteen women, though I’m only sexing eleven of them, and one golem.  Travelling with me into the unknown.  Well, unknown to fourteen of us.  Two are actually from there.

So… travelling into the sort of unknown?  Kind of mysterious?  Abandon some hope ye who enter here?

Ugh.

All round?  Guess I'm feeling, well, unsatisfied.

Look at the tower shining above the mists on the northern horizon.  Roads in isekai land usually follow the terrain instead of cutting through it.  So they twist and curve enough to make even a snake dizzy.

And at the moment, the tower’s on my right.

My breath steams a little.  It's unseasonably cold this morning.  Created a lot of fog.  At least that's helping hide our convoy from sight.

“Everything just feels… unfinished.”

Hitomi tilts her head.

"Unfinished?  Jon-kun?"

"Yeah…  Didn't restore Frankie’s fertility.  Didn't learn proper necromancy.  Nor any other magic.  Proper like.  Never auctioned the guns."  Tilt my head back.  "Even failed to find divine daddios tomb."

Hitomi rests her chin on my other shoulder as I continue whining.

"Expansion of the Grand Suite just got started.  The new workshop isn't even half built.  Was also going to add a maternity ward to Sayo Clinic."  That gets Red’s attention.  "All that work, wasted."

Blue squeezes my other knee.

"Darling, take your measure not by your failures, but by your successes."

Red leans forward and kisses Blue before turning to me.

"You saved every woman here, husband.  Gave us love.  A home.”  Hand on her belly.  “A future.  Any fool who says-"

Mana enhanced shouting interrupts her.

"Viscount Jon Barton!"

Fuck…

Looking through shadows I see we’ve reached Raelera's north gate.  However, instead of a line?  Instead of city guards?  There are, sigh, templars.

Dozens of armored fanatics are lined up in front of the gate.  Pointing pikes our way.  And on top of the thirty foot high walls?  Musketeers.

Can feel the same holy curse from Abives trying to suppress me but, it's much weaker.  Minions are barely bothered.

Drabek's hundred skellies are escorting us.  Along with a hundred shadows, ten wraths and ten golems.  The rest of the skeletons, ghosts, and golems went back to Transylva.

In front of the pikemen are two metians.  The first is a man who looks like the classic witch hunter.  Wears a brace of pistols, rapier, crossbow, and several holy symbols of Metia.

An inquisitor.

Next to him is the generic priestess from a dozen different anime.  Though her holy apparel has an edge of lewdness to it.  Displaying big titty cleavage and exposing lick worthy legs.

An oracle.

The guy standing in the middle of the cobbled road yells again, without mana this time, as my convoy comes to a stop.

"Viscount Jon Barton!”  Holds up a bound scroll.  “I bear a warrant from the Holy Office of the Inquisition for your arrest and questioning regarding heretical acts!  You and all associated with you shall be taken into custody for examination!”  Pulls out one of his pistols.  “Any resistance will be deemed an act of war on the most holy Universal Church of Metia and treason against the Royal Kingdom of Tourin!”

Nobody does nothing.  Mister Inquisitor begins to look annoyed.

“Lord Barton!  Debark and accept your faith’s and your liege’s command!”

What is it with everyone thinking they can push me around?

“Be right back ladies.”

Give each of my wives a quick smooch before kicking the carriage door open and jumping out.  Frankie and Hitomi lean through the carriage windows.  Handing me Sanctity and Tormentor.

Notice girls in the other carriages leaning out to watch too.  So I give them a dashing wave before heading to meet the dumbfucks who asked to die today.

Hmm…

Should I start wearing a hat?  Yeah.  Like one of those cool swashbuckler ones with a big feather.

Start walking across the cobblestones.  Passing a number of skeletons and shadows.  Their presence out in broad daylight, well, foggy daylight, is actually quite the statement.

Couple months ago?  Seeing any undead would have caused a major panic.  Now?  Around here at least?  Just nervousness, cold sweats, and the occasional fainting.

Huge improvement.

Give mister inquisitor my best, you gonna die, smile.

“Say, Inqi.  You ever met Metia?”

The metian’s smug, I’ve got him just where I want him, grin turns confused.

“What?”

Sigh.  Idiots.

“I asked if you ever met the bitch.”

His eyes narrow and his lips start twitching as he snarls back at me.

“And why would a beast care if I have?”

Oh.  Guess he’s not so dumb.

“Well, I’m about to kill you.  So figured you could give her a message for me.”

He snorts, looks at the pikes behind him and muskets above him.  Facing me again, this time with a sneering expression, he asks.

“And what is this message?”

“She’s next.”

Inqi’s eyes bulge a bit as his face darkens.  Trembling with rage, he points the pistol at me and draws the rapier.  His mouth opens to yell an-

“CHUO!”

Pressure far heavier than the inquisitors' earlier shout or oracle’s holy curse crushes down.

Both the inquisitor and oracle are driven to their knees.  The pikemen and musketeers behind them straight collapse.  Several muskets fire but their aim is hopelessly off.

Can feel the weight hammer down on me too but I bear it.  Want to strike back but don’t when I realize it's localized to the gate.  My women are untouched.

Look for where that aura is coming from and find… superwoman?  A good hundred feet above my carriage is a floating lady clothed in a billowing robe.

And, unlike gramps, this woman doesn’t look like a roided out old pedo.

A long dark blue silk robe with bright green oriental dragons sewn on.  Edging and collar in gold, as is the sash tied around her waist.  [Super Senses], and the wind, reveals a green wrap covering her breasts and privates underneath.

C-cups?

Sleeves are wide and the skirt of the robe is open on both sides.  Straight black hair is held up in multiple folds and buns by green pins.  Her eyes are a deep green, as are her lips.  Contrasting with her milky white skin.

A belt around her waist secures an empty scabbard to her left hip.  Its sword, drawn and in her right hand, is pointed downwards.  The Jian style polished silvery blade is double edged with a red double fuller and smoothly tapers in width and thickness.  Very unlike tourinese swords.

However, like tourinese swords, it also smoothly curves to a point.  The hilt is a deep green, like her eyes, with a guard carved into an oriental dragon’s head.  A dark blue tassel hangs from the pommel.

Can feel it from here.  A weapon with its own mana and will, like my superswords.

The pressure remains but it, and her voice, softens.

“Nihao yeman.  I am Baiyu Jingi, Lao of Beyulongong.  His imperial majesty bid me escort his royal daughter’s consort and companions to Yangxu.  And this I will do.”

While the flying lady speaks, two more flyers appear.  Though these two stand on floating swords.  Also women, their robes are the same dark blue but they have a lot fewer light green dragons sewn on.  The edging, collars and sashes are silver instead of gold.

Their hips have scabbards on both sides but only one drawn.  I’m guessing those are the ones they are standing on.

And while they also float about a hundred feet up.  Instead of above the carriages?  They hover over the wall.  Staring down at the musketeers on it with utter disdain.

Templars look pretty freaked out but the inquisitor recovers quickly.  See he tries to muster his mana but it's completely suppressed.  So he settles for shouting more instead.

“This is a writ from the inquisition!”  Holstered his pistol and waves the rolled scroll again.  “It is a divine command that supersedes the whims of lesser authorities!”  Points his sword at the flying lady.  “Including nations an ocean away!”  Wow, this guy really wants to die.  “Leave!  Or risk Metia’s wrath!”

Superwoman’s eyes turn cold and I can feel mana focusing in her sword.  The two sword girls place hands on the sheathed hilts of their second blades.

Just as inqi begins drawing his pistol again, a hand gently lands on his shoulder.  Stepping out from behind him is the oracle.  She pulls back her hood, oh quite the looker, and glances at me before looking up at superwoman.

“Nihao Dajie Baiyu.  Is there no room for compromise?  Perhaps a vow to return her royal highness’s consort after the tribunal is done questioning him?”

Impressive that her mana is not suppressed, but only an idiot trusts fanatics.

Eh?

Hehe… oh you dirty girl you.

[Super Senses] picks up on the oracle’s chantless casting.  Smells like a charm spell.  Not surprised she knows that taboo magic.  She can’t always rely on trading her body for favors.

“Bu.”

If the oracle is fazed, she doesn’t show it.  The mana being pumped into her spell increases.  Risky, but it's their only shot now.

“Truly?  The inquisition sincerely wishes to geimianzi to dajie.  Mayhaps just giving us some time alone with the beast to-”

Superwoman interrupts her and the pressure increases.

“Bu.  And if you do not stop that yeman magic meimei?  This dajie will punish you.”

Oh, busted!

Oracle’s shoulders droop in defeat.  After a long sigh she faces me.

“I look forward to our next meeting, Jon.”

She turns and her hand squeezes the inquisitor’s shoulder.  He’s visibly furious and looks about to start shooting anyway.  Until the porn priestess shuts him down with a scowl.  Spinning around, inqi starts barking orders.

“Faithful!  Withdraw in good order and rally at the barracks!  Begin!”

The heavy pressure from superwoman’s aura disappears, letting the templars move again.  With a lot of resentful looks, the pikemen and musketeers march away and are soon out of sight down side streets.

Kung fu queen floats down until she’s in front of me.  Speaking without mana now and her voice is quite nice.  A deep adult woman’s voice.  Sultry but commanding.

Eyes me curiously before doing the kung fu greeting.  A slight bow with fist meets hand.  Though the hand side is straight instead of wrapping the fist.

“Nihao Junfei Barton.”  Junfei?  “My sheng’er and I shall escort you to the ships.”

I copy the hand thing.

“Alight, thank you, uh, Dajie Baiyu.”

The sword twins, just realized that they are, giggle and say something way too fast for me to catch.  Superwoman wags her finger at them.

“Lao taitai wo?  Xuan’ern?”  Turns back to me and [Super Senses] notices the barest blush.  “Return to chepi so we can, uh, go.”

Really need to learn their language.

Nod and jump back inside.  First waving to the girls in the other two carriages.  Hugs and kisses all round then we are rolling again.

Gate guards never did show up.

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Our ride through Raelera turns into a bizarre silent parade.  If the undead weren’t enough to clear traffic?  The flying girls with the intimidating auras definitely put us over the top.

About felt like we had sirens blaring as carts and wagons pulled over and the crowds stood aside and watched.

Within an hour we reached the port.  And if I remember the History Channel correctly?  What waited would have been a familiar sight to Christopher Columbus and the like.

Dozens of ships are here.  Some even anchored offshore.  Maybe waiting for their turn.  A few single masted ships but the rest have two or three.  Most have taller sterns than the, uh, middles and bows.  Some have taller bows too.

Arms wise it seems a mix of catapults and ballista.  Type wise most look like caravels or carracks, I think.  And as our convoy navigates through the busy docks?  The ships get bigger and bigger.

Is easy to pick out the few elf ships.  Similar designs but everything looks sleeker and smoother.

Entire port is bustling as cargo of every imaginable sort gets loaded and unloaded.  Being rolled in or out of the warehouses on the other side.

They’re so preoccupied that even our strange circus gets barely any notice.

[Super Senses] tells me the drop off is getting deeper and deeper as we go.  Maybe that’s why the larger ships can dock in this part of the harbor?

Eyeballing it, the boats started around fifty feet long and ten feet wide.  By the end they are up to almost a hundred long and thirty plus wide.

Well, until we reached the very last piers.  And waiting for us there?  Well, what else can I say?

“What a piece of junk.”

…

No, hehe, not the Millenium Falcon.  Literally junk.  As in chinese junk.  And, no, I’m not some shipbuilding expert.  Just recognize those ribbed sails from lots of movies.

The other ships’ sails look like huge bed sheets.

And besides the sails, the boats look oriental.  Aesthetics wise.  Even got a pavilion looking house with a tiled roof on the raised stern.  Very different from the tourinese, aquecian, and granyan vessels.

Should I ask where the nuclear wessels are?

They also look less, well, woodier.  Hull wise.  All the ships look like they’ve been painted.  The, uh, yanese and granyan boats are mostly white.  While the tourinese and aquecian ships are mostly brown.

And lastly?  They’re huge!  Half again as long as what I’m guessing is an aquecian carrack next to them.  The next biggest ship here.  Three junks occupy the last wharfs and have four or five masts each, compared to the aquecian’s three.

“Xingan!”

Would know that excitedly waving and hopping girl anywhere.  Little Li, leaving her entourage in the dust, charges as soon as my boots touch the ground.  Leaping into my arms.

Wraps those long legs around me and does her xianxia best to examine my tonsils.

“Dizi!  Biaoxian Hao!”

Uhoh…

Little Li practically leaps off me, well she lept on me to begin with.  And frantically bows.  Then does the fist hand thing while, from the sound of it, apologizing.

A lot.

Twins float down and hop off their swords.  Sheathing them as they giggle more and whisper back and forth.  Immediately stopping when they see Big Ji come around a wagon.

Superwoman locks on to her and starts stomping over with fire in her eyes.

“Ni gan lai!”

*smack*

Kung fu queen lands a huge slap across Ji’s face.

Fuck tha- Eh?

I’m about to slap superbitch back but Li grabs my sleeve and begs me to wait.

Older sister’s face is full of shame, pain and regret.  But she doesn’t fall.  She doesn’t cry.  She just clasps hands, bows and says.

“Bai ni, Shimu.”

The woman stares at Ji with hard eyes for what feels like forever.  Finally she replies.

“Bu.  Bai ni, sheng’er.  Bai ni.”

Whatever she said shocks the hell out of Big Ji.  But doesn’t get any time to respond as superwoman then wraps her arms around Li’s older sister, giving superhugs.

Ji’s tears start flowing and the twins close in.  Joining the hug ambush.  Li says we need to give them space and pulls me away.  I keep the mommy and daddy ninja shadows close though.

Just in case.

Orders get yelled about and fourteen wagons are smoothly lined up then lifted aboard by large cranes of wood and iron.

Dockworkers drive each carriage onto a wooden platform, chock it down, and then winch up the whole pad.  After unhooking the horses.

They won’t be coming with and are led off to stables to be sold.

While we watch the carriages get loaded, Big Ji arrives, so all sixteen of us walk up a gangway to board the closest junk.  Agrag, with now man-sized Frazur, immediately goes below to check the wagons, undead, and golems.

Though they’re spread across three ships.  So not sure how he’s going to check the other two.

Greetings and salutes fly all over in a language I don’t speak and we are soon being dragged out to sea and into the retreating fog by a couple of smaller boats with sails and oars.

Being my first time at sea in, geesh, decades?  Head straight for the bow.  My women tagging along behind me.

Reach the front just as the scrambling crew gets the sails raised.  Tons of cloth curves and fills as it catches the wind.  Away from the sweaty masses of Raelera, the smell of the ocean reasserts its salty dominance.

Under the prow, waves crash and split as this one hundred and fifty plus foot monster plows through.

Cool, are those dolphins?

…

“Xingan?”

The entire harem is now lining the front of the ship.  Watching the dolphin looking things swim and jump in front of the boat.  I turn to see Little Li and Big Ji walk up to me on the bow.

Gather both of them in my arms and take turns sharing spit the fun way.

Don’t even notice superwoman and the twins coming over.

*ahem*

Come up for air and notice both sisters are a bit tipsy now.  Eyes dazed.  Lips and tongues still moving.  Kung fu queen giggles.  But I notice both her and the twins are blushing this time.

“Xixi.  Xiao Li, the captain pleads we hurry.  A storm is coming."

Li wakes up enough to get embarrassed again and turns, bowing, to superwoman.

"Shi, Shimu."

Grab a handful of her ass and twist her back my way.

"So where, exactly, is our bed?"

Young Li thumps my chest with little fists.

"Xingan… do not tease."  Looks over my shoulder.  "We have yet to board."

Hear a couple gasps from the harem so I let go of the sisters, turn towards the prow, and…

Ho Lee Fuk!

Big!

The climbing sun burns more mist away and reveals a huge fucking boat.

Seriously, I thought this ship was colossal.

Before me is a wall of white wood two or three times as tall and two or three times as long as the boat we're on.  Boat?  Ha!  More like a canoe compared to this new giant.

"One, two, five…"

Nine?  Nine towering masts.  Like someone chopped down ancient redwoods.  There's so much room for sail you might be able to cover Lions Keep with it.

On the prow, a couple stories above me, is a giant metal monster head.  Think it's, uh, a chinese lion?

Sails on our junk are pulled down and ropes thrown back and forth as we pull alongside.  A crane, almost as big as the ones in Raelera, reaches over the side as the crew opens the hold.

A smaller lift is winched down and we are soon hauled aboard.  Of course superwoman and the twins show off by flying up.

Once the lift opens?  Feel like I've stepped onto a wood football field.  Even with the huge masts, there is just so much freaking room.  See a second crane on the deck's other side.

Watch as our wagons are hauled up over the side and then down through a couple of even bigger cargo hatches.

The soaring masts aren't in a straight line either.  Eight of them are spaced out in rows of two.  The ninth is out front.  There are also a few smaller masts.  Even seem to be a couple up top, in between the big ones.

The bow to my right looks one story taller than the, uh, middeck?  While the stern to the left looks three stories higher.  And the house on top of it looks more like a little palace.

Another entourage is waiting for us.  Bowing to superwoman and then to Little Li.  Some of them have robes and skirts similar to what the kung fu girls are wearing.  The head honcho looking guy in gold even has a cape over his robes.  Others have robes and what look like pantaloons.

Some soldiers are with them.  Wearing lamellar armor and holding spears.  Though the little rectangular plates are made of leather instead of metal.  Yeah, wearing heavy metal armor with so much water beneath you?

Probably a bad idea.

The regular sailors are running around in vest shirt combo tops with, uh, cargo shorts?  Khaki shorts?  Not sure what to call them but they look comfy.

Tempted to get a pair for myself.  Then all I would need is a hawaiian shirt, some sandals and I’ll be ready for anything!

Once the navy is done bowing and scraping to the cultivators, Little Li drags me across the deck towards the rear of this supership.  Happily playing barbie tour guide.

“Welcome to the baochuan Jinshibo, Xingan!”

Fuck, more stairs.

Of course superwoman and the twins gotta show off again by flying up.

God dammit!  That’s it.  Sort of remember those cultivator books and I’ve just decided that I’m going to fly too.  And when I become an immortal with the dao thing?  It's not going to be the dao of the sword, or the dao of time, or even the dao of my left testicle, that gets me there.

Nope.

Mine will be the Dao of Fuck Stairs.

“Look Xingan,”  She points at a three story house in the middle with a platform sticking out boward.  “that is the captain’s quarters.  Where the entire ship is steered from.”  Then points at the u-shaped one story house surrounding it.  “Those will be,”  Big blush.  “our quarters… xingan.”

So cute.  Almost makes climbing three flights of stairs worth it.

Almost.

Of course the place is fantastical.  We open the doors to marble, columns, and tile.  Totally has the china look going on.  With the architecture and furniture.

Do you Feng Shui?

There’s even a little garden courtyard thing between the captain’s “house” and the guest house.  According to Big Ji there are other passengers too but they and the officers stay in the three floors below us.

Little Li the tour guide has led us all the way to the back middle of the guest house and is standing in front of blue double doors.  She turns back to me and is suddenly all shy again.

“Uh, Xingan?”  Twisting a foot with hands behind her back.  So cute!  “Guests who stay here on a baochuan are among the strongest and wealthiest.”  Can’t look at me now.  “And they often bring their wives so…”

Big Ji gets tired of waiting and walks up to her younger sister.

“And Dashi needs his rest.  So his nuxing should not keep him waiting.”  Ji reaches around her and pushes the double doors open revealing…

Paradise.

A huge thick bed, superior to even the shag pad in the Grand Suite, commands the middle of a bright room of white, blue, and gold.  Far lighter than the wooden lodge look on top of Lions Keep.

White marble floor with gold inlays.  White wood walls with little colored tiles arranged artistically.  Thin blue wood columns support the ceiling.  Gold silk curtains cover clear glass windows along the far wall and also drape the bed.

There is no fireplace but plenty of couches, chairs, and tables.  Even shelves with books.  Cushions galore.  And green, uh, jade "eastern" dragons are everywhere.  Stitched, painted, carved, and tiled.

As the harem spreads out they find hangars and dressers for clothes in walk-in closets that even have mirrors!

According to Li there are twelve other, smaller, bedrooms.  As well as a study, kitchen, dining room, etc...

Red discovers the baths.  Yeah, that is one big ass tub.  But I haven’t found what I need to set my mind at ease.

Finally, opening a mostly camouflaged door, I see it.  Oh you beautiful glorious thing.  Fuck magic, this is what real men need to live the dream.  Its smooth surface is cool to the touch.  Made of wood but sanded and polished to an impressive degree.

Lid clips down to stay closed.  Guess for rough seas?  Are those bars to hold on too?  Guess for really rough seas?  The scent is like fresh flowers.  Incense perhaps?  Even has a box of water above it.  Fed from who knows where but I don’t care.  As long as it works.

I’m tempted to hug this wondrous thing but manage to restrain myself.

Yes, I found the toilet.

“Whew…”

With my heart, and bowels, now at ease.  Wander back into the bedroom.  Servants dressed in robes are busily hauling in the mountain of luggage we brought.  And helping my ladies find where to put it all.

Chuckle to myself and step through another door.  This one leads to a balcony beyond the windows.

“Fucking A!”

This little balcony hangs out the back of the ship.  Eyeball it to be about, uh, six stories up from the water?  See we are leaving a huge wake.  Damn, didn’t realize we were even underway.  In fact, barely notice any rocking at all.  This titanic is pretty freaking stable.

Shit, hope that wasn’t a flag.

Around this leviathan are other ships.  None are as big but a couple are pretty damn large.  Most are about the size of the first ship we boarded.  Learned they’re called fuchuan.  Must be over twenty vessels in this fleet.

[Super Senses] picks up something I’ve been missing.

“Wait.  Are those… cannon?”

What.  The.  Fuck.

Nope.  That’s it.  I’m done for the day.  Way too much crazy shit.  I’ll deal with aquecia not being the only human gunpowder nation tomorrow.  Going to relax for the rest of today.

“Xingan?”  Turn around to see Little Li peeking out the doorway.  “Are you okay?”

Hehe…  Seem to recall being asked that earlier.

Give her my best smile.

“You bet, beautiful.  Care to join me?”

My little china girl squeaks and comes skipping across to where I’m leaning against the railing.  She’s carrying a clay jug with handles and a stopper in its top.

A glowing smile lights up her face as she leans into my chest.

“I am glad you like it, Xingan.  Was so worried you would not.”  She holds up the bottle.  “Oh, this is a gift from Shangjiang.”  Giggles.  “Said something about it being the drink of real men.”

Take the bottle and, with one arm trapped by Li, use my teeth to pull the cork stopper out.

The smell immediately grabs my attention.

“Is this?”  Spit out the stopper and take a swig.  “Ha!  I’ll be damned.”  Chuckle.  “This is rum.”

Li tilts her head.

“Rum?”

Squeeze and help her tongue taste the rum left in my mouth.  When I let her breath again, she’s flushed and has that lovey dovey smile.

“Li?”

“Yes…?”

“Do you know where I can find a tricorn hat?”

She scrunches her eyebrows.

“A trihorn hat?”

Give her ass another squeeze.

“Nevermind.  I’ll look for one later.”

The yanese princess snuggles into me more.

Huh.

In a fantasy world.  On a wood ship.  Sailing across an ocean.  A beauty in my arms.  Drinking rum.

Hehe.

All I’m missing is the hat.

♫We’re devils and black sheep, we’re really bad eggs.

Drink up me hearties, yo ho.♫1https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3A19q7rysLs

End

Volume 3