77: Another Talk
Somehow, I kept us from taking fall damage, but only just.
We landed on a pile of old, rotting wood— well, Paisley did. I landed on her. Except for my arms, they were still around and under her.
Feeling her whole body like that, warm and soft beneath me… it shorted my brain. She wiggled, pressing her butt into my groin in an attempt to free herself, and I quickly tried to get up. At the same time, she rolled over, and the sudden movement caused me to fall again.
This time, we were chest to chest, hip to hip, and nose to nose. I froze, assailed by the sensations of soft warmth and softer eyes as they looked up at me.
“Last time we were this close, it was the other way around— me on top of you,” she said with a nervous, whispered laugh, her breath tickling my lips.
“Yeah,” I agreed, absolutely loving how gorgeous she looked. Some sort of soft yellow light was illuminating her face from the side, and it made her features pop deliciously. I should get off her. This wasn't okay. We were just trying to be friends. I was fighting for my life, here.
But… I could kiss her, right here, and right now— and it didn't seem like she was opposed to the idea. Her eyes held so much gentle hunger, and frankly, that was part of the problem.
“I really, really want to kiss you right now,” I told her, each word surging with a mirrored ache in my heart.
“It's really tempting, huh?” She replied, the corners of her eyes crinkling with an uncertain smile. “In my experience, though, going through with a kiss sorta locks things in. Um, at least, it does in my overly romantic mind. After that, you can't really back out anymore— or, I struggle to. Others might be, you know, different.”
She swallowed, and her eyes drifted down slightly— looking at my lips.
“Sounds like you've done this a few times,” I said, drifting the tip of my nose over hers affectionately.
She giggled, the act causing her chest to move under mine. I swear, that velvety sensation almost knocked me out cold.
Letting out a stuttering breath, she said, “I've had a couple other relationships, besides the one I mentioned. I've had more ‘almost’ relationships, that— well, letting the feelings fade while not acting on them, it turned out to be for the best.”
The romantic excitement within me began to fade as she referenced being in similar situations. Would I be one of those ‘almost’ relationships that she mentioned to whoever came next? Inwardly, I wilted like a flower doused with bleach. How would I even find someone else who'd be interested in me? How long would that even take?
As if I'd been ambushed by a man wielding a baseball bat, a realisation hit me. I had thousands of years ahead of me, to try and find someone, which meant… I was immortal, and she wasn't.
Pushing myself off her, I sat heavily on the ground as the implications of that revelation struck like a second blow. I was an Exodan now— a citizen of a secret nation whose entire realm was inaccessible to Paisley. Our relationship would be stuck in VR— or, lesser VR. I was already thinking of Exodus City as being real, because of its relative quality and non-gamey nature.
“Keiko?” Paisley asked, sitting up— worry in her expression.
“I just… realised some things,” I said, my voice hoarse with sadness. “I’m immortal, since I was digitised… and you'll never be able to join me at home when I log out, and— gosh, taking you to that beach would be—”
My mouth snapped shut when I realised I was saying too much, and therefore potentially breaking Exodan law.
Paisley looked confused. “Log out… a beach? You mean in VR? You can't go back to reality, right? You have no body?”
I stared helplessly at the rotting wood around us. It'd been a stairway once, I think.
“I can't tell you.”
She leaned forward. “Can't tell me what?”
I flashed her a frustrated look and flopped my arms weakly in a shrug. “That I'm actually a martian now, and the planet has always been a verdant paradise.”
“Wait, what? Really?” She asked, surprised and intrigued. “I know there's science bases there, but—”
“Paisley,” I groaned. “I was saying stupid things to make a point. ‘I can't tell you,' means just that— I can't tell you. It's part of the agreement for becoming a digital human.”
She frowned, looking genuinely irritated, although not at me personally. “That sucks. Now I'm curious. You went to the beach?”
“Paisley, the important part is that I'm functionally immortal now.” Grimacing, I shuffled awkwardly to my feet. My wings were still out, so I fluttered in a burst, attempting to blow away some of the dust I was caked in. I succeeded, but also got a bunch onto Paisley.
“Oi!” She complained, following me to my feet. Chagrined, I fluttered again, throwing the dust off her this time too. That seemed to mollify her, but she still gave me a look. “Look, Keiko— that whole ‘oh no, I'm immortal,’ trope is so silly. Especially when— Look, there's ways that a couple could fix that. Like, um, if we were going strong for years, I'd digitise to be with you, no doubt.”
She was looking incredibly shy and uncertain by the end of her little speech, and that meant that apparently, her shoes became very interesting.
I stared at her— dumbfounded and feeling like my heart had suddenly become lighter than air. “You would?”
Flapping her hands in a very half-hearted shrug, she said quietly, “Keiko… right now, you have my heart in a vice grip. Like— I'm not entirely sure why I'm even resisting this anymore. Every… every hour in your company seals things more than a stupid kiss ever would.”
Stunned by her extremely romantic words, I had to remind myself to breathe. If I'd been amazed before, now I was completely speechless.
“It’s ridiculous, I know!” She said, suddenly loud and almost… angry. Throwing her hands in the air, she clarified, “Gah! Fuck, one moment you're all about to kiss me, and a part of my stupid brain is like, ‘ohhh no, what if things go wrong?’ But then, when you don't kiss me, and you start talking about secrets, and being a digital human, I'm over here ready to dedicate my whole damn life to you. It's nonsense. Don't listen to any of that stupid fuck pseudo-sage advice I'm babbling. I'm an idiot.”
“Paisley, chill,” I said helplessly, reaching out in an attempt to touch her— mollify her somehow. I stopped short of actually making contact. “Look, I can see why it's a good idea to wait, now. I'm still getting used to being a woman, obviously, but… you're fighting battles with your own indecision. It's okay to take things slow. Let's just—”
Clang.
The sound of a metal pipe being slapped against stone caused us both to leap a foot into the air, and wide eyed, we finally turned our attention to our surroundings.
We were in an excavated hollow, with the bricks of the big wall extending down into the earth, except where an archway had been built through it. On the other side, a warm yellow light was hanging from the ceiling of a natural cave. Inside the arch, between us and the light, stood an annoyingly familiar figure— Mheitai, holding a copper pipe.
“You're both absolutely adorable, but could we, perhaps, hurry things along?” She asked, rolling her eyes. “Honestly—”
She paused, and then with a little evil grin, looked at Paisley. “My dear, whenever you get around to it… she enjoys being tied up. Think on how you might leverage that in the future— Not now, though. Now, I would greatly appreciate it if you would, get, a, move, on.”
She punctuated the last four words with a sharp tap of the pipe on the stone arch, then, with a puff of black rose petals and dancing red ribbons, she vanished. The pipe, left behind, rattled and bounced when it hit the ground.
She wasn’t done, though, because her voice echoed one last time in the enclosed space, “Oh, and my sweet, idiotic little Keiko? Equip your newly acquired items. You have a new class item— use it.”
Silence descended, and for several long moments, all either of us could do was stare at the space where she’d been standing.
Finally, I turned to Paisley. “I hate her.”
“That was her, wasn't it?” Paisley whispered. “The class trainer you mentioned. Wow, she is sassy.”
“We were actually getting somewhere with that conversation,” I sighed, staring daggers at where Mheitai had been.
Paisley stepped closer and brushed my shoulder with a hand. “It's okay, we said the important stuff. I was just getting myself worked up over nothing, again. We'll take things slow, and— gah, it doesn't matter. Let's play the game, okay?”
“Okay,” I said, trying not to sound so sullen.
Forcibly pushing everything from my thoughts, I glanced around. “What is this place?”
“I don't know, but look at the stonework,” said my friend, pointing to the archway. “See how the bricks were cut clean, but definitely cut at some point? The bricks that make the curve used to be the same as the ones that make the rest of the wall.”
Giving the archway a much more thorough eyeball, I realised she was right. Someone had come along after the wall was built, and had very carefully and skillfully made a hole in it.
Curiosity pulled me closer, and when nothing jumped out and ate me, I peered through the thick stone arch. A small orb of warm yellow light, held in a decorative iron cage, bathed the tunnel beyond, all the way until it turned out of sight.
“I like that light,” Paisley commented from beside me. “It's pushing back the influence of the Lands of Death. We're not tiptoeing over the threshold like we were above.”
I turned to stare at her. “What? The Lands of Death? Aren't they supposed to be really deep underground? Like, below the deepest dwarven holds?”
“Most of the time,” she agreed. “But, they're also just… weird. Someone or something cursed the lands up there, so now it's got a bit of death in it. Actually, fun fact, I look over into the Lands of Death when I'm casting my spells. You get this passive that lets you see their influence. It's a whole mechanic— but, it'll take ages to explain.”
“Why didn't I know any of this?” I asked, turning my attention back to the light, which was apparently magical.
Paisley laughed, and a glance revealed she was staring at me incredulously. “Keiko, you were an absolute power-gaming goblin until recently. Like, you'd start practising your moves during lore exposition. Honestly, you're still a bit of a power-gamer, but at least you're living in the world a little, now.”
“That is rude…” I said, deadpan— until my expression slipped and I smiled. “But also accurate and deserved.”
Giggling, she gestured forward and began to walk. “Come on, let's go explore. Who knows, maybe we'll find a bit of lore— subject you to some exposure therapy.”
