Chapter 447 – The Kids are Crazy

"Your fingers are sooo soft," I groan.

"Thank you, dear," Ioelena whispers. "I can feel you twitching. You're ready for another one, aren't you?"

"Yes, oh yes," I moan.

"Release it. Let it flow out," Ioelena instructs.

She's started getting off on telling me what to do after she ran out of things to say to me about Vanya. It's such a weird thing, especially when I can follow her instructions perfectly. But it is a good distraction, so I just have to make sure she doesn't think she's allowed to do this that often. I'll have to tie her up and force her to follow my instructions. Maybe I'll have Vanya help me out.

But I can't completely forget about the pixies in the tub. I do have to make sure they get pregnant and give an annoying Queen some twins. It's harder to get them pregnant this way, but I don't know if it's because I'm not touching them, or if my sperm is dying off too fast. So far, I've got all of them pregnant but the Queen. I think she's hoping that being at the end will save her from carrying twins, but I'll get them in her belly. I have plenty more seed to spill.

"Oh, fuck, that was a lot," Ioelena says. "You're an amazing woman, Alzi. How is everything going?"

"Just the twins are left," I moan. Oh, I've got a few swimmers inside Treedoc now, so I just need to get the eggs to meet them. What an annoying little Queen. I did accidentally give one of her wives twins as well. This really is a terrible method of getting someone pregnant. The mana usage is way higher than it should be for this. "There. Sorry, another also has twins."

"Alzi," Treedoc says. "That's a joke, right? You didn't actually give me and my wives twins!"

"I told you about it already," I say. "I just forgot who the other one is." They aren't the only ones who can play cruel jokes.

The pixies at least start to laugh. Ioelena slides her hand off my cock, joining them in laughing about something.

"One of them really is having twins," I say. "Treedoc and another one of her wives."

"Well, we don't have to worry about them asking you for more kids," Ioelena says. "Let's get your dress back on. I believe we have some time to spend with the kids."

"These kids are going to be scary," I say.

"They can't be any worse than Irlo," Ioelena says. "That little girl has too much energy. We can handle them for a little bit, but then we do have to get back for dinner."

"It is getting late," I say.

"You didn't really do twins, did you?" Treedoc says. "I thought you were joking."

"No," I say. "I don't joke about kids. Work with Ioelena's family so I can come by and help you give birth."

"Yes, Alzi," Treedoc says.

How long are they willing to go along with a joke just to get one over on someone? Did she really think I wasn't ready to give her twins? She has to have some idea of how many I'm carrying right now.

"Watch your arms," Ioelena says. "Dress coming down."

"Thank you," I say. With this dress, I should probably just watch the kids play for a bit. There's no need to risk something stupid happening, and I can't exactly fly around with them when I'm missing my underwear. I'll have to figure that out with the pixies in the future so I can safely play with my kids.

"Another will show you the way," Treedoc says, her eyes focused on the far wall. I'm guessing some rune or Skill is draining the small tub. The other pixies are all looking at each other, hoping to get some clue about who has two kids inside them.

I wonder if it was part of their mana that made me forget which wife got twins. It would be funny to blame them for the mistake.

"Very well," I say. "Enjoy your pregnancies."

"How many of us are pregnant?" One of the wives asks.

"What do you mean?" I ask. "You're all pregnant, though Treedoc is carrying twins along with another of you."

"This isn't funny, Alzi," Treedoc says.

"I'll swing by in a month for a checkup. I'm a little worried about your brains," I say. "It seems you were all hit on your heads too much when you were kids."

Ioelena does her best to contain her laughter, but I didn't think it was that funny. This method of conception must fail more often than it succeeds, so I can't really blame them for not believing me that they're all pregnant. Treedoc was pretty annoying to get pregnant.

"Come on," Ioelena says, dragging me towards the door.

A pixie is waiting for us right outside the door. She gives a strange salute before she starts flying off towards the middle of the city, Ioelena dragging me after the darting pixie.

...

"Ioelena," I huff. "I know I had a ritual to help me with the pregnancy. But I still don't have good balance with this belly, and my organs are still squished around."

"Sorry," Ioelena says. "The pixie didn't seem like someone who waits around for others. Come on, there should be a park of some sort past the tree. You can hear the laughter."

"Very well," I say. The laughter almost sounds like little bells off in the distance. It would be funny to hear what kind of music the Pixies like to make. I'm sure it's a chaotic beauty.

"Brave women," a new pixie says. "Daring to go play with the kids in your state."

"I think I'll just watch," I say. "I kind of agree with your thoughts."

"That's a good idea," the pixie says. "Just be careful not to get tricked into playing with them. Only the Queen is trickier than a kid trying to play."

"I'll be careful," I say. Our tour guide is waiting for us next to a tree. I'm guessing a similar spell to the one hiding the city is used for this. If the little bells are really the kids playing, I would have to see something going on around the tree.

I step past the tree and... "What is this?" escapes my lips.

This looks more like a panic than a bunch of kids playing. Pink streaks are flying all around a small clearing. The kids are the source of the bells, that much is clear, but what isn't clear is how this is allowed. The kids are playing tag, which is normal, except that they seem to be running into traps. Some are simple rope traps that lock them in place, but others are running into pans and falling out of the sky!

"Is this why you were laughing?" I ask. "Because they all really were hit on the head a bunch as kids?"

"Yes," Ioelena says. "You have to be tough to play with the pixies. Not even the adult pixies are willing to join the kids here. We should get out sooner rather than later. They have times when they are calm, but this doesn't seem to be one of them."

"I see," I say. "They're cute, if you ignore them running after each other like they want to kill each other."

"You'll get used to it," Ioelena says. "There is more structured play time that isn't as dangerous. When I heard the bells, I figured out what time it was. Shall we head out?"

"Yes, I can't risk this while pregnant," I say. Luckily, we only went a step into the clearing, so we're able to leave before the kids can get us turned around with their crazy games. "Dinner?"

"I'm sure they've got something cooking by now," Ioelena says. "I know enough of the city to get us home. This way."

...

"Thank you for today," Ioelena says as the edge of the forest comes into view. "I was a little scared to say I love Vanya. I love you, but you understand."

"I do," I say. "You're my wife, like Vanya, and I see no problem with you two being extra close. It'll be good for her to have someone she's comfortable with helping her during her labor. It'll be coming up soon, and it'll be a long one. Just know, after today, you've gotten yourself on the list of my wives that I plan on getting pregnant soon. Vanya will be getting a break. Her first one has been hard on her."

"I'm happy to carry for her," Ioelena says. "If she isn't feeling ready for kids, I can take them instead. I know it's not the same, but I think I'm more suited for having kids over and over. Warriors struggle with having a belly more than we witches do."

"You two can work it out between you," I say. "I need to start caring about what my wives want. Mommy asked not to have twins, yet I did it again. I need to learn some restraint."

"Just don't kill me, and I'll accept them," Ioelena says. "How will my lessons work?"

"Hmm, I didn't think about that," I say. "I should've asked Treedoc about the plan, but we can figure it out over the next few weeks. Sorry."

"Oh, that's fine. The pixies have never been very helpful to my family members who have this quirk. I can wait a few more weeks to start figuring it out. I'm just afraid I'll end up in that clearing."

"Do you think that is why their playing is so crazy? The kids don't have control over their mana? Oh, that makes a lot of sense. They must have a lot of runes around that clearing, making it safe for the kids to play like that."

"It fits," Ioelena says. "Can we all join you in bed again tonight?"

"I would like that," I say. "It's really comforting, having you all so close."

"Welcome back, my Queen," Kou says with a bow. "Dinner is almost ready. I'm glad you remembered to come back for it."

"I almost got tricked into playing with the crazy pixies," I say. "So I guess I almost forgot about dinner."

"Playing with kids is a natural thing for you to do, My Queen, so I wouldn't count that as forgetting. It's one of the few things I will let you use as an excuse while pregnant," Kou says. "Shall we go?"

"Lead the way," I say.

...

"Ten feet!" Elora shouts. What she's talking about, I don't know. Some fight obviously, but I don't remember what she was supposed to be fighting. Sedriresa gave her a bottle of wine for this dinner. "All I could do was turn in circles and swing around, hoping I didn't slip! Monsters..."

Sedriresa gives me a pathetic smile and mouths, 'Sorry.' I'm guessing that's my cue to take her to bed. I think I should keep Elora to just a glass of wine when she isn't pregnant. The others seem to believe whatever story she's shouting out, but it seems rather out there for me. Still, I have been in a small village and brothel for most of my life, and I'm now about to become a true dragon. So maybe her story is true.

"Elora," I say. "I think you need to go to sleep again. We can get the bed ready for the rest to come piling in."

"But looove!" Elora says, going for more wine, but Sedriresa snatches it out of her reach before Elora can get more. "Fine."

"This way," I say.

"I'll come with you," Mommy says. "This pregnancy is taking a lot more out of me this time, it seems. Thank you for another wonderful dinner."

"We're happy to see so much joy," Ortis says. "It's great having Ioelena back home and hosting a Queen. It's been too long for both. You've all brought a lot of joy to this old house."

"It's been a good visit," I say. "A bit scary, but it's working out. Now, Elora, stop looking for wine, or you're going to end up pregnant again."

"If you wish, my love," Elora slurs out, stumbling into my arms and practically crumbling in them.

A single night of drunken talking isn't enough, it seems. At least she was talking at dinner tonight.

"Let's go curl up together," I whisper. Sedriresa helps me direct Elora out. I'll have to keep Elora close for her next pregnancy. I need to keep all my wives close, it seems. I really need some extra bodies. I haven't gotten many Skills from my three new classes. I hope you're planning something big for me! And make it good, please.