Chapter 232 – Rules in the Army

"Alzi, you haven't eaten anything today," Geta says. "I'm sorry, but we all missed lunch, and I know you didn't have dinner before coming here. You are pregnant and need to take care of yourself and your child. Tomorrow, you can go longer, but it's dark and well past dinnertime."

"Put me down. I haven't even reached half my mana," I say, punching her back for no reason. She put me over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes and hasn't cared about a single thing I've done to try and be put down.

"We didn't do this correctly. You've already healed a thousand women somehow," Geta says. "Tomorrow, we will do this the right way. Over this month of marching, you will get to all of the women in the army and give some of them a second chance."

"My Lady," Shyla says, watching her Lady be handled like a petulant child. "You need to eat. You can't help them if you faint."

"Stupid," I mumble. Like I want to eat more of that mana trash. One of the benefits of my new home has been good food. Mommy would make it better, but the food was far better at the manor than at the brothel.

"Dear, can you not hit me? I am trying to keep you from passing out," Geta says. "Don't make me spank you."

"You better give me a good handprint," I say. "I know my fist isn't doing anything to you. It may even be a massage."

"Fine, dear," Geta says. "I'm not going to mark my wife in public. Look, I understand your desire to help them, and I wish we could continue, but you are about to pass out. Tomorrow, we will prepare better, and you'll reach more of the women. I'm happy to help you, and they appreciate it, but if you pass out, Elora won't let you do it again."

"She promised not to treat me like a slave."

"She wouldn't be. She would be taking care of the healers in her army."

"Glad she found a workaround."

"You aren't supposed to be doing this at all, you know?" Geta says, moving past the healers' tent. "Even marching, you are only meant to be in the healers' or men's section of the camp. That is for your safety, but Elora is letting you break the rules, at least for now. Normally, the woman comes to the healers for this kind of thing, and the officers decide if any woman is hurt enough to see the healers."

"Stupid," I say. "Shyla said I had a right to do this as the head healer."

"Kind of," Geta says. "You have a right to call them to your tent to be healed. Not to go around and heal them. That is the real rule."

"Icy bitch didn't care about the rules," I say.

"The other healers will care about these rules," Geta says. "Princess Esiyae is currently dying for her mistake, but I don't wish to see you die. You are once again about to marry your Mother, and I don't wish to take you away from her a second time."

"If you do?"

"I'll die with you," Geta says, putting me down in front of my tent, Shyla standing there waiting for me.

"Good for you," I say.

"My Lady," Shyla says. "Your dinner is ready inside."

I was hoping to be done with this shit food. One of the few good things about the Princess was having normal food and meals. It feels weird to say it, but a bit of hunger feels good. To want to eat again.

Now I feel tired and weak, but I don't want to taste this shit.

For the kids.

I choke down the hard bread and wash it down with water. It would be nice to have Aurora here for more water, but eight kids is too many to drag her out to war.

Shyla joins me for the shit meal, struggling to eat it as well. It is nice to see I won't be the only one struggling with this food. I guess I'm struggling less than she is, finishing the stupid meal well before my maid.

Shyla refuses to look me in the eyes as she tries to finish the food. "When was the last time you had mana food?" I ask.

"It has been years, my Lady," Shyla mumbles. "When I did my small-time adventuring work. Even then, I only had it for a few meals. I'm sorry you had to deal with this constantly for so long. It lacks all the flavor and joy that normally comes from a well-cooked meal. The family has truly failed at giving you the nice, happy life you deserve."

"I don't think any of the nobles believe I should have a nice, happy life. They love to torture me, rape me, and make sure I never have a moment of happiness. No, they do let me have happy moments, but only so I'll feel all that much worse when they fuck me over for their pleasure."

"I'm sorry that has been your experience, my Lady. I know your wives wish for you to live a happy life with your Mother and children, working as a healer. They have failed, but they wish it will come true."

"I'm at war, learning stupid rules that will get in the way of me just healing the women who'll be fighting for me to keep my child. I don't understand why most of them exist. Like, we aren't anywhere near the enemies, so why does it matter if I'm not in the healing section? Why are the officers who cannot diagnose issues making the decision about who I heal? Some are just annoying, like healing the nobles first, even if it means letting commoners die."

"These rules are how wars are won, my Lady," Shyla says, finally finishing her meal. "And how the healers can be kept safe. Princess Elora is aiming for the throne to improve the lives of commoners. She knows how awful it is that she's asking you to let commoners die for nobles. But if you don't, more women will die. Sometimes, life just sucks. For the other rules, they were made by the healers to keep them safe. If we blur the lines between a healer and a combatant, then the enemy has a way to kill you without repercussions. With that comes things that just have to work that way, or everything would break down. Not every healer can take the time and mana to diagnose every issue a woman faces like you can. For you, it hardly makes a dent in your mana; for one like Esta, it would lower the number of women she could see. Rules are often made for the average woman, not the special woman. That is why they give out exceptions like with your healing today."

"Stupid," I say.

"When marching here, yes, my Lady. But when we face the enemy, they could very well attack the camp and 'accidentally' send an attack that hits the healers if they are in the main camp. I'm sorry these rules put such a burden on you, but they were made for the average healer and in response to real events. They are needed to protect as many healers as possible, my Lady, even if it means sacrificing others."

"Their goal is to get the kid in my womb so they wouldn't dare to attack the section I'm in. I could protect them even more by wandering around in the main camp."

"Yes," Shyla says. "Yes, but you have to think about the other healers and what would happen to them. If you act like a combatant, they may be marked as fair targets as well. Even if they would never attack you, personally."

"Fine," I say. I guess trying to find a way to make war better is a stupid exercise, especially for me. I'm more likely to make it worse for everyone, just like Shyla said. I'll just get everyone else killed or something.

"I'm sorry to be so rude, my Lady. War isn't a good time for anyone. It is sweet of you to try and find a way to help the soldiers, and I will work with you to help them as best you can. We just have to think about the consequences and make sure we don't do more harm than good."

"Well, you'll have to do all the thinking," I say. "I've never gotten the consequences right for any of my actions."

"We are meant to work together, my Lady," Shyla says. "You may not always like the answers, but I do wish for you to get as much of what you want as possible."

Well, someone has changed their tune. "We'll see about that," I mutter. "Is there anything else I have to do tonight?"

"No, if you like, we can get you ready for bed, and then tomorrow, we get ready to travel again, my Lady."

"Sleep sounds nice," I say. I don't know how sitting in a carriage all day can be tiring, but it is. Though I guess I did some work moving and setting up the tent and healing some of the soldiers.

Without a fire, I'll have to let Shyla put clothing on me for when I sleep. Maybe I should start doing that in general, just in case they let me get kidnapped again.

Shyla starts to work the layers of clothing off my body, the heeled boots coming off as well. She goes all the way until I'm naked, and then, just a simple nightgown comes out.

It is thicker than a normal nightgown, but there's nothing special about it, though it does have a lot of room to fit around my wings and a hole for my tail.

Shyla gets a similar nightgown, and we get into bed together. A thick blanket helps keep us warm. My maid is working as my teddy bear yet again.

Shyla is going to have to really mess something up for me to not walk out of this war liking her. So far, this family has managed to keep doing that, so maybe she'll continue the streak, but I imagine she'll still be somewhat liked. She's one of the few in this family who I kind of like.

"Goodnight, my Lady," Shyla says.

"Goodnight."