69: Welling Sincerity
The brisk mid-morning air and clear skies made for a pleasant and peaceful atmosphere as Tsunade and Sumika made their way around one of the Senju estate's many promenades. There seemed no particular destination held in Tsunade's mind as they walked, but the Sannin did make a pit stop out an outbuilding, where she collected a stack of papers and scrolls and tucked them under her arm.
The pair maintained a calm and unhurried conversation throughout their stroll, mostly Tsunade pointing out some quiet getaways and places she used to play as a child. That and extolling how much she wished for Sumika to see the flowers blooming come spring. The woman's cheer and warmth brought a continued sense of ease to Sumika, the topic of scenery helping her recover from the morning's intense interaction.
Their stroll took a pause though, as the pair neared the banks of the wide lake next to the estate.
"Ah, no matter the season, this is one of my most favorite places of all." Tsunade said, beaming a smile down in Sumika's direction, "Want to check out the lake-view gazebo?"
Saying this, the woman nodded towards the wooden boardwalk bridge leading out to a structure near the middle of the lake.1For frequently-used locations in Konoha I want to illustrate, or that have changed over time, I will try to include an image for reference.
2Also, ignore that this is a Summer photo. It's currently Winter in the story, use your imagination if this bothers you :|
Following Tsunade's gaze, Sumika took in the scene. Water glittering in the sunlight and reflecting the pale grey-blue winter sky. The gentle sounds of faintly swirling currents clearly audible to her ears. The faintest hints of frost and ice on the lake's shore, and even coating the tiled roof of the distant gazebo.
It was a sight worth seeing. Sumika felt she understood Tsunade's fondness for the place,
"Sure." her soft voice replied with a touch of amiability, "I like it here too."
Tsunade seemed glad to hear it, guiding the girl across the bridge and into the wooden pavilion with great vigor. Inside, a set of six benches were spaced out to match each wall of the hexagonal interior, allowing for a view out into the surroundings from any direction. The Sannin took a seat on the easternmost-facing bench, looking into last remnants of sunrise, before gesturing for Sumika to take a seat next to her.
The girl easily obliged.
"This place is quiet, right? I like to come here to be alone, or to read in peace." Tsunade sighed out, shrugging one shoulder to indicate the stack of papers and scrolls tucked under her other arm. "Even in this annoyingly chilly season, I'd rather be outside."
Sumika could easily agree that it was nice to be outside, but that was because she was unbothered by extreme temperatures. If she were actually cold, then being out would be much less pleasant. This she knew from experience. After all, she hadn't always been this way...
Thinking this, the girl's eyes narrowed and she gazed at Tsunade's thin, loosely-drawn kimono. If the chill was annoying, why did Tsunade dress so lightly? Tsunade was the one who insisted that Sumika be all bundled up in the first place! The girl's eyebrows quirked in confusion, and then drew down in skepticism. A mildly displeased feeling welled up in her mind. Yet at the same time, the longer she looked the more reluctant she felt about complaining...
Before a conflicted Sumika could figure out what to say, Tsunade looked at her face let out a hearty laugh, "Aww, Sumika-chan you don't know how adorable that look is!"
Was... was that relevant? Wait...? Sumika's confusion instantly doubled.
"Hnnn, were you worried about me?" Tsunade said with a lopsided smirk, "It's chilly right? But as long as we're here together, you're warm enough for the both of us, right~?"
At that, the woman brought her free arm around Sumika's shoulder and snuggled the girl up against her side. Tsunade was... indeed, quite warm to the touch, even... even through layers of fabric. However, Sumika felt her own cheeks were growing the warmest of all. Wait, what was she thinking about again?
With the girl still leaning into her side, Tsunade lifted her arm to stroke the top of Sumika's head fondly.
"All jests aside, the chakra training I practice keeps my body temperature regulated. I don't feel cold and it's a barely noticeable burden on my concentration, so you don't have to worry." Tsunade added softly. The effect of her words was somewhat diminished by the fact that she was still lightly snickering.
Though Tsunade's skinship brought about a tingling sensation in her heart, the woman's words piqued Sumika's curiosity.
"Chakra training? What kind of chakra training?" she tilted her head up to look at Tsunade face, some excitement unexpectedly leaking into her voice. Well, after all, Sumika's body seemed to produce a similar effect as this training, regardless of the ambient temperature. The prospect of potentially learning more about the changes to her body was enough of an immediate distraction.
"Interested? Well it's more of a high-level technique, but we can test if you have the aptitude once we-" Tsunade flinched, a sombre look gradually dimming her smile, "Ah, right."
The two glanced at each other's expressions, both searching, both worried.
But Tsunade spoke again first,
"You know Sumika-chan... I worry for you too. I'm always so happy to see you doing well, that I almost forget... how much I worry." she paused again, setting aside her stack of paperwork and pulling Sumika into a tight hug. Before the girl could even realize it, Sumika's own arms had lifted to reciprocate the hug. Perhaps here in Konoha, only with Tsunade was Sumika so subconsciously comfortable.
Their silent embrace lasted a while, interrupted only by the sounds of rustling breezes and surrounding nature, but eventually Tsunade separated, bracing the girl's shoulders and holding her at an arm's length,
"I don't know if I can understand entirely, but I know you've suffered through a lot." Tsunade sounded gloomy, but her expression was ever so tender. It was that honest expression which Sumika appreciated so much. "Grandmother and I spoke a lot, about what she noticed and more. I..." The woman glanced aside before refocusing, "I know I could have been more diligent, paid more attention and spared you more pain, but..."
The woman took a deep breath, locking eyes with Sumika. Tsunade reached around inside a pocket an produced a small parcel, handing it over with a sad smile. It made Sumika's heart twinge to see such sadness on Tsunade's face. W-why..?
"As I said, I refuse to make the same mistake twice. Especially not when it could hurt you, after everything... at least, I hope you'll let me try to help." the woman added, gesturing for Sumika to open the package.
Tearing away to paper revealed two small half-spheres connected by an adjustable elastic strap, each made of a dense cloth with steel plates rimming the outside. Sumika glanced up from the item in her hands to meet the woman's bright brown eyes. These were...
"They're ear mufflers." Tsunade added somewhat sheepishly, "Specially made to protect against both loud noises and cold weather. I also wanted to take you a few places around the village today, but... like I said, I don't want to make the same mistake twice."
A burst of warm feelings surged in Sumika's heart, and she gingerly placed a hand to her chest. The other rose falteringly to her ear.
Sumika stared at the woman. The Sannin, the formidable Senju Tsunade. Someone who wanted to help.
Averting her gaze from the mildly-awkward Tsunade, Sumika immediately drew back her hair and donned the earmuffs, weaving the elastic strap to rest against the back of her neck.
Tilting her head from side to side, the individual earmuffs stayed firmly affixed to the shape of her ears. They were thin but dense, warm and comfortable. Letting her hair drop back down concealed the whole apparatus. As long as she wore her hair loose, no one would even know she was wearing them.
Their effect was immediately noticeable too, as innumerable ambient noises became muted and much more easily ignored. With this, when venturing outside, no longer would her focus be so easily overwhelmed like before.
Practical, tailored by genuine concern, and well-made. A truly thoughtful gift. Sumika felt traces of moisture gather in her eyes as a tightness squeezed in her chest.
"How is it?" Tsunade asked, her voice still clearly audible. It was muted, but the difference seemed similar in volume only because Sumika no longer had to tune out quieter environmental noise. An illusion, perhaps due to how the mind inherently processed sound?
Still, the surge of gratitude Sumika felt banished all those idle thoughts,
"T-Thank you. I..." despite herself, Sumika's lips curved up at the sound of her own slightly-muted voice, "I have rarely received..."
'-rarely received such kindness', she was going to say.
Pausing belatedly, Sumika realized that she had in fact been receiving quite a lot of kindness lately, from clothes and shelter to Kaoru's handkerchief and Tsunade's earmuffs.
Genuinely touched, a Sumika welling with sentiment lifted her gaze and watched as a wide smile once again bloomed on Tsunade face, the woman simultaneously spreading her arms wide. Confused by this unfamiliar gesture, the girl hesitated and tilted her head inquisitively.
In response, Tsunade's shoulders slumped slightly, her wide grin slipping sideways into a slanted smile that was somehow even more saccharine and affectionate.
"Sumika-chan, a pose like this... is an invitation for a hug."
That was all she need say, for Sumika launched herself into Tsunade's embrace. So often this woman managed to banish the girl's fear, wash away her anxiety.
Always, always she wondered, were these the feelings she was searching for? That she felt them now made the emptiness Sumika knew from before seem all the more painful. Soon enough, the girl once more felt moisture from her eyes staining the sleeve of Tsunade's kimono.
"Thank you..." was all her trembling voice could manage. Gratitude was the only emotion she could put into words.
"Just like this," Tsunade whispered by her ears, still plenty loud enough for Sumika to hear through the mufflers, "Whatever it is, please let me try to help. Even if an embrace is all I can offer."
Sumika gave a tiny, rueful shake of her head, pressing her forehead tighter against the woman's shoulder. It was clear to her now, that Tsunade knew Sumika harbored worries she could not bear to speak of. But she did not press. She respected Sumika's fear. But still, she offered to help. Still...
"Then," mustering her courage, the girl croaked out, "I'll be in your care."
After quite some time spent outside, the two made their way back into the main estate buildings. Though there was still a lot Sumika wanted to speak of with Lady Mito, it seemed there was no busier day than today for the elderly matriarch. And since all the fuss and activity originated from worry on Sumika's behalf, there was really naught to be done about it.
Mentioning the topic in passing to Tsunade, a switch seemed to flip in the Sannin's mind and the woman had confided her own grave concerns about Sumika's growth and prior treatment, and that a more comprehensive checkup on her health would be essential regardless of their path forward. How such a thing escaped more immediate attention, Sumika could only guess, but... Tsunade had been a bit odd and preoccupied all day... the events in her room this morning were proof enough of that...
Why did life and freedom have to so often inspire such unending confusion?
But still, this sort of thing had been mentioned in the past, back at the Yamakuni and in passing on the way to Konoha. Whereas previously the idea of an examination was unnerving... after witnessing so much sincerity, now Sumika just could not shake the feeling that Tsunade held the girl's best interests at heart. And even in a state fear and secrecy, Sumika had to prepare for the future... assess the risks and drawbacks.
If it was Tsunade alone...
Deep in her heart, Sumika resigned herself with an icy determination. It rang with the same chords of feeling that her mind echoed when preparing to battle. Life and death battles could take place in many forms, and Sumika had to admit, the abominable truths of her past put her on edge...
Whatever Tsunade's medical examination revealed, the girl would also reveal some truth accordingly. If she was going to hide, if the people here were going to... help, then her story and disguise had to be ironclad. She simply wasn't skilled enough to hide everything completely by herself. That much was easy to understand now. In fact, it was practically proven at this point. Someday, perhaps someday she would remedy that.
The cultists, the sacrifices, the ritual, her true power... at thoughts of them, tension gathered and coiled in her body. A nervous tension, a wary tension. But this course of action was also a chance for her to learn about the changes to her body, a chance to prepare for... unforeseen consequences, and with the aid of renowned medical professional at that.
Now that there was so much hope for a better future, for a chance to recover herself, damned if Sumika was going to neglect the opportunities afforded here!
As such, she joined the immensely relieved Sannin for a sojourn to a clean and simplistic clinic room hidden away within the main Senju estate building. It seemed that there a decent amount of time remaining before Tsunade was needed at the hospital, so they offloaded the Sannin's bulky stack of work documents in a side-room along the way.
Arriving at their destination, Tsunade donned a large white medical coat over her kimono, but didn't bother fastening that shut either. Sumika's eyes twitched a bit at that. Soon after though, the woman went about gathering out all sorts of clipboards, notes, textbooks, and peculiarly enough, a heavy metallic box.
Furthermore, since they were inside the already-abnormally-quiet Senju estate, Sumika removed the earmuffs, letting them rest around her neck, where they were immediately accessible yet still largely concealed by her clothes and hair. Just having them rest on her neck reminded the girl of Tsunade's kindness, still a fresh and pleasant memory. Her auditory sense thus restored to her own albeit-abnormal normal, Sumika found the clinic room to be similarly quiet and innocuous as her previous experiences within the estate.
Glancing around the place while Tsunade busied herself, it looked almost more like a library or study, given the amount of glass cabinets and bookcases lining the room, but there was a matching set of two upholstered medical cots near one side. A personal treatment room, perhaps? The air was also tinged with the leftovers of some herbal scent, like that of mild incense or spice. There weren't any other obvious traces of such being used, but her nose was sharp enough to smell it clearly. Still, it was far from repugnant. Quite the opposite.
The sound of rattling metal drew her attention back to the only other person in the room.
Tsunade spun around while digging keys and scrolls out a drawer, trying different combinations on the metallic box.
At the sight of the coat fluttering about back and forth while Tsunade worked, an idle thought sprang unbidden to Sumika's mind.
Ahh, that coat with her outfit really suits her well.
Sumika wasn't sure where that impression came from, but it was doubtless one of appreciation. The realization of which was unexpectedly cheering... and calming. Until recently, she hadn't had much opportunity to appreciate anything, much less a sense of aesthetics. To find out more of her own likes, or interests, or desires3 ...I think you already kno~ ɢᴀʏ.... to find out more about herself... it was a good feeling. Thinking positively, if this went well, perhaps one of her most pressing curiosities would be satisfied.
Tsunade eventually looked up and caught Sumika's somewhat vacant stare,
"Sorry, sorry! Because of your unique circumstances, I need to access some special records and documents. Please have a seat on either of the beds. It won't be long now, I..." her voice faltered as another key in the drawer nabbed her attention, before it too inevitably failed to be the correct one, "Can never remember the damned..." The muttering trailed off into a muted, irritated falsetto, "Just another day with Grandmother... Oh, 'it's in the drawer.' Sure yeah, just like all the other keys, that helps... Don't worry 'You'll know it when you see it.' What do you mean?! Gotta be kidding me..."
In spite of herself and her unease, Tsunade's affable bemoaning conjured such a disarming atmosphere that Sumika felt some tension leaving her again. So the girl took a seat on the plush bed nearest the door, kicking her feet slightly since they dangled above the floor. In part to relieve the last dregs of nervous energy inside, she occupied her attention by fiddling with a few of the longest locks of her hair, twirling them around and around her fingers.
However, a quiet thrum sounded through the room, rapidly dragging the girl's attention back to Tsunade.
A muted green glow illuminated that side of the room, though... it originated from two distinct sources.
The Sannin held aloft a metallic key which shone with a feeble light. The other, much more powerful light... shone from within Tsunade's robe, a certain necklace she wore, once again... reacting...
Rubbing a palm to her forehead, the woman slouched and sighed, "Ah well, 'You'll know it when you see it.' Grandmother... didn't lie. Even now, every time."
The Sannin's aggrieved tone aside, her preparations resumed. By now, almost all of Sumika's tension had been forgotten in favor of much more benign feelings.