CH44 — The Dragon’s Heart & Fealty

「 That was… that was amazing, master~ 」Her breast heaves as she lets out long breaths.

Even after several minutes passing by, her body still needs some time to take a rest and process the aftermath, indicating that she’s definitely still not used to sex.

Thankfully the heavy blanket covers my throbbing erection. If not, she might heavily insist on doing a second round — forcing herself once more on my selfish desire.

「 Can we sleep close together? I want to fall asleep while embracing you. 」

Wh-what?

「 Come, master, wrap your arms into my body. I heard this is the optimal sleeping position for lovers~ 」

She turns her body to face me. She lifts up the blanket, revealing all her stunning curves, her voluptuous breast, and ass, her dreamy lilac hair splays across the bedsheets like wildfire.

I hold my breath for a second as my dick twitches, mesmerizing myself with how stunning she is.

「 No, need, Shen. 」I turn my back to her, trying to hide my growing lust.

Does she know that sleeping snuggling is good, or did mother teach her almost everything…?

「 Is there something wrong, master? 」

「 Nothing, Shen. I’m just…  」My words trail off, not knowing what excuses to say.

「 I-I… I understand... 」Her eyes gaze lower, seemingly disappointed.

「 Haaa… What do I do with you... Come here. 」I open my arm,「 You’ll be the one to wrap your arms to me. 」

She doesn’t delay anymore and soon she comes closer to me. Her thin hourglass figure clinging tightly to my side as I still lay my back down on the bed. One of her long legs wraps around mine as her arm around my chest, as if she’s not letting me away.

Her head snuggles on my chest, comfortably, feeling her smooth hair. Her horns are poking a bit close to my face which ultimately doesn’t bother me much, but her horn reminds me that this beautiful goddess was once a ferocious dragon.

「 Hehehe… I must say, I am quite jealous of humans to have arms to embrace their loved ones. 」

「 What was it again that humans say when they’re going to sleep...? Ahh... Good night, master... 」

「 Good night, Shen. 」

I leer down and see Shen already closing her eyes, sleeping.

Have I ever slept like this with my past wife? No... don’t think too much about it. I shouldn’t dwell too much on the past.

「 zzzzzzz… 」

Even she can snore loudly huh… She must’ve been tired.

Truly a beautiful goddess, that doesn’t befit her to be in love with me. What was that proverb again...? A toad lusting over a swan’s flesh?

I close my eyes, as I try to wane off my lust as I lull myself to sleep.

…

A nudge rips me out of my slumber sleep I’m having. Taking some time to orient myself, I find Shen writhing next to me.

She lets out a gasp, arching her back. As she sinks back down, a single tear, reflecting the moonlight that shines in from the window, slides along her cheek. Reminding me of that time Hyledd experienced a nightmare...

No...

No, no, no, no...

Not again. Please!

She talked about being alone her whole life. I want to believe that. As disgusting as my wish is, there is nothing I desire more than to be assured of her solitude. To be assured that I have someone beside me.

Because only someone like that would stay with me.

But no matter how sincere she sounded, she could have kept some secrets from me. Even when compared to Hyledd, she is flawless, so why should she not be perfect at lying as well? It is fair as I haven’t told her much about myself either.

I don’t want to see.

I don’t want to know.

Just keep on living being ignorant. There’s nothing better for people like me anyway.

She has to follow me, I have no one else. What bad could a few convenient lies or ignorance would do?

This might not be true love, as I’m abusing her dependency on me, but this is close enough and this much is fine.

Yet, will it be fine for her?

Telling myself that everything is alright because this inherent power of mine twisted her mind to love me — suffer for me — betraying her loved ones time and time again?

Trash through and through. I really am.

I look at her once more, her teary eyes soaking the pillow…

You know what? Fuck it. It’s better to face the harsh truth than a beautiful lie. I’ve done it with Hyledd before, so I could do it again.

If she does have someone else or does not truly like me, then so be it. She deserves a far better man anyway.

I reach the drawer next to the bed, where I grab a mana potion. The last time I used the 《Somn》spell, it used a magic circle ritual with alchemy ingredients, as they not only help to correctly channel the spell but also to optimize the mana usage. As now that I’m more familiar with it, I do not require the magic circle ritual anymore, however, the mana usage still remains high. This mana potion will provide me with that.

I immerse myself with the faint mana connection between me and Shen from this weird power of mine. Feeling its silk-like connection, I chant my spell.

『 Somn 』

My conscience sinks deeply and my eyes close shut, as I prepare for the worst.

…

The dream that greets me is one filled with mountains everywhere ranging from all heights, but all transcends the cloud level. As far as the eye can see. And I’m residing in one of the peaks of the mountains, all white with its glacier and snow.

Everything here is white and blue, I try to look down past the mountain but could only find the cloud level as if they are the ground in this realm of existence.

I immerse myself in this otherworldly spectacle, where I found Naga is on top of one of the tallest mountains, near me.

『 THOUSANDS OF DRAGONS HAVE COME TO ME ONCE MORE. THEIR ARROGANCE AS HIGH AS EVER.   』

Naga’s eyes lower, wandering and sweeping across far down below. I followed its gaze and found numerous dragons corpses, their bodies mutilated or at worst unrecognizable. Littered around as if they are just swarms of dead ants — insignificant.

Dying the snow red. Adding a palette of colors to the scenery that I once thought to be only white and blue.

『 DEFYING THE MANDATE OF HEAVEN. DEFYING AGAINST YOUR SUPREME ONE. 』

With a closer look, blood is all over its scales, whether its own blood or the blood of its enemies, even I don’t know. A never seen before side of Naga. Its bloody exterior adds a profound monstrous and ferocious feeling.

『 AND NOW LOOK AT ALL OF YOU. DOWN IN THE DIRT LIKE THE VERMINS THAT YOU ARE.  』

Naga turns its attention to the only dragon still standing, which seems to be the Mervyn kind with its black scales and huge wings, surrounded by the death of other dragons down in the field almost on the same level as the clouds.

Wounds fester its body like smallpox. Its black scales body, covered in its own blood.

『 I APPLAUD YOUR BRAVERY, LITTLE ONE. TO BE THE LAST DRAGON TO REMAIN STANDING. THERE IS NO SHAME IN TAKING FLIGHT. LET WHAT HAPPENED TODAY TO BE BYGONE. 』

Naga stares into the crippled small dragon, Naga’s chin held up very high as he belittles and mocks him with its very own presence. But even then her words carry a different attitude as she seems to willingly leave a survivor to retreat, somehow slightly out of character with the supreme one attitude. An unusual change of heart for someone supreme.

The receiving dragon didn’t take Naga’s treatment kindly, as it replies by giving back a ridiculing smile.

『 I... Pity... You, Supreme One. 』

The sound is hoarse, throat clogged with blood. Its dragonic body loses its vigors, but within its eyes, a rather look of defiance sets blaze deeply.

Its words are filled with the audaciousness and fearlessness of a dragon as Naga returns the favor by staring dagger at it. Questioning Naga’s authority.

『 For Never Feeling The Drive To Sacrifice One’s Life For Your Loved Ones 』

Naga’s eyebrows twitch. Its stares become sharper and sharper. Her take on belittling the crippled dragon takes a nosedive and Naga starts to take a far more serious turn to it.

『 To Never Feel Love Or To Be Loved. 』

Naga keeps staring at the crippled dragon, rock-still. Thinking deeply about its words. Pondering over it.

『 I Shall Stand My Ground. 』

『 And I Will Die Valiantly And Join My Breathens In The High Heaven. 』

Naga lowers its chin, its face parallel to the receiving dragon down below. The dying dragon let out a thin smile as if it notices something changes within Naga. An opening. The dragon then lets out a burst of small mocking laughter deep in its throat that goes unnoticed by Naga.

『 What Will You Do Now, Supreme One, Now That You Realize You Are So Very Alone 』

As soon as the other dragon finishes its speech, Naga dashes to him in a flash and sinks its teeth to the already crippled dragon. The receiving dragon swirms and writhes as it feels the sharp Naga’s teeth around its long reptilian neck.

A second later, the dragon’s body is cut cleanly, like a sharp knife cutting through a steak. In a very brutal and primitive way unlike when with the others where Naga uses magic.

The last spot of clean ground is soaked in the dragon’s blood. Giving a fresh coat of blood to Naga’s scales that have already been dried with multiple layers of blood.

Yet even though it is a total victory on her part, she stares deeply up to the sky. In its draconic eyes, a look of sadness comes from within.

And in the end, her eyes drop back to see the numerous corpses of other dragons as far as the eyes can see.

…

「 M-master… 」

Her soothing voice wakes me. I open my eyes, Shen's face comes to view first on top of mine, looking directly into my eyes, seemingly concerned.

A dream. A memory. A sad one for sure, but not what I expected. I was expecting her to encounter her dragon loved one, or something else. But what I found instead is just a slaughter-fest. Considering her past as a supreme dragon, that much is expected and can even be considered as far as something mundane for her.

「 By chance... Did you peek through my mind? 」She says, cutting me off from my thoughts

Shit. She found out huh… Even Hyledd didn’t notice I'd peeked at her dream.

「 H-how did you know? 」I say, quite stunned.

「 I sense and feel your eyes prying deeply into my core. 」

Damn, this soul connection of us is quite intrusive.

「 I’m sorry for invading your privacy, Shen. You must’ve felt creeped out by it. 」

「 No, no, no… Master... There’s no need to apologize. You own me, body and soul. Is there a reason why you were prying into my mind? 」

She deserves to know…

「 I… I wanted to know why you were having a bad time sleeping. It seems that you were having a nightmare, a bad dream of some sort. 」

But then again, there’s no need to tell the whole truth.

「 It’s nothing master needs to be concerned about. Just a rather fickle dream... 」

「 If you don’t mind me asking… 」I ask anyway, my curiosity taking a hold over me,「 What about the dream makes you so uneasy? It seems to be a normal one, considering you are the supreme one. 」

「 On the outside, it might be that way. However, it is a superior custom to keep secure of its innermost thoughts, and the mind. As a superior should be silent and thoughtful without a show of weak emotions. 」

Her eyes looked directly at me, longingly.

「 If I show even a small minor weakness, they will all pinpoint and attack with all of their might to that very weakness. 」

「 I… I… I was miserable, master... 」She says quietly, 「  I am a supreme one, but everything feels meaningless and there’s no joy in anything. 」

Without me trying to press her, she already does so herself. She seems to be a bit uncomfortable, being this emotional, but a tinge of eagerness is apparent, making me not stop her.

「 Before I became the regarded supreme one on the heavenly mountain, I spent my life wandering around the world exploring every nook and cranny, fighting and dominating other dragons and even other beings. I thought that was my destined purpose, as I was the most peerless dragon in the realm. As if heaven mandates me that I, the only dragon of my kind that comes to existence and undoubtedly supreme in power, must trample the others and make a name for myself. It was a fabricated purpose that I keep repeating to myself. A lie I’ve made on my own to grasp onto, since the beginning of my meaningless life. 」

「 But even then… for an immeasurable amount of time that lies… it doesn’t fill the void. The void of a sense of belonging or a reason why I truly exist. Or how do I continue existing… 」

「 At that moment of realization, understanding the futility of everything I did. I retreated and settled down on the tallest mountain, the heavenly mountain. Waiting for the inevitable end of times. Those dragons that came after me… The one you saw in my dream, I’m sure those are dragons who tried to avenge the dragons I’ve slain before I settled down. 」

I could catch a glimpse of her slight disparity, shoulders trembling with emotions.

「 Thank you, master. For putting up with my past foolish draconic arrogance... and to let me experience love and to be loved. 」

「 And for granting me this human body, which I’m sure is to serve you better, and ultimately love you better, my master~ 」

She ends her confession with clearly longing feelings for me as she snuggles and embraces my arm…

「 Don’t worry, Shen. You are not alone anymore. I’m always here for you. 」I say as I head-pat her.

Serve… Love…

Fealty.

It goes back to the unanswered question I have in my entire two existence. What is the definition of love?

Why does she consider servitude, No… submission as love?

Is fealty even another form of love…?

Will submitting herself towards her master — me, give her fulfillment and a great deal of happiness?

Is her love for me something so profound — or twisted — that she gladly submitted herself to me?

Is her love towards me out of her free will or this twisted divine palace power?

I look to my side, Shen is still snuggling and embracing my arm. Her eyes closed, seemingly already in a deep calm sleep.

If what she wants is love then fine. I will take responsibility. I will accept and reciprocate her feelings. If the only person who can truly accept her now is only me, then I will gladly be that person.

At the very least… Until she finds a much better man that suits her more than me.