44 — A Reason to Never Want Anything Else

Dae Hee watched me for a few moments.

"Are you going to stand there the whole time, staring?"

"Sorry! Um, yes... no? I mean, what are you going to do?" She took a few steps towards the centre of the grassy pitch, where I stood, waiting.

The breeze played with Dae Hee's hair, lifting a few strands around her head and fluttering them playfully, just the way the streetlights reflected on her skin. She really was a very cute girl, though tragically ill-dressed in this setting.

"I'm going to pass the ball to your feet and you kick back to me." I held up a finger to make a point. "Don't get fancy. Just pass me back." With that said, and no time wasted, I rolled the ball lightly. Her eyes tracked the ball and she took an awkward swipe at it. It rolled back at a forty-five-degree angle, nowhere near my position.

"Nice... attempt. But it's not good. It needs to go to me. Aim, look and try again." My voice took on a teaching, instructing tone, similar to what I felt like I'd sound in an actual lecture. "It's simple."

"It's not!" She protested. There was a tiny, adorable pout. Her hands curled into tiny, clenched fists as she looked at me defiantly. "Why would you do that anyway? Why do you need to aim? Don't you just... hit it?" She stomped her feet.

"No, Dae Hee. Football is... precision. The more precise and careful you are with the way you treat the ball, the better it treats you. You have to take control over it."

"But that isn't any fun!" She retorted. "I'd rather do that, uh, kickflip, thing!"

"That is also cool." I agreed, chuckling. "We can do that after you manage to properly kick and pass the ball back to me."

Dae Hee let out a soft sigh and a half-hearted groan. Her face fell into an unhappy, glowering frown that was more puppy than fierce dog. She looked back up at me. Her cheeks went rosy. She quickly glanced away and kicked the ground lightly, with her toes, as if to dig at some grass."Dae Hee, ready?"

She nodded.

I passed her the ball again, and the first five minutes went on with little to no actual results. She kicked the ball in every direction except at me.

"This isn't that bad!"

"Yeah, sure. Just try again. We're getting to it." I tried to sound patient and supportive.

Dae Hee bit her bottom lip, staring down at the ball on the pitch.

This time, when the ball came to her, her feet shuffled, she lined up her left leg, then she drove her right foot in a sweeping, fluid motion that made her body bend slightly forward, sending the ball flying high, far above and beyond me.

My eyes tracked its path for a while, before returning to meet her. Her cheeks burned bright. Her fingers twitched, then gripped the hem of her shorts. Her lips formed a soft, pouty 'o'.

A second later, the sound of something breaking could be heard.

Dae Hee's eyes went wide as dinner plates, her face turning pale, almost ashen.

"Uh-oh..." Her voice dropped to a tiny, frightened whimper. She was biting her lip.

"Well..." I stared at the location where the ball had flown to. "You've become a bad person too. What do you know." I muttered.

Dae Hee's expression contorted into a mask of absolute mortification, shock and guilt. It almost felt comical.

"Am I... am I in trouble?" She whispered, as if scared that her own words might bring down hellfire on her head. I raised an eyebrow. There was no sign of someone approaching to berate us. Nothing at all.

"Why don't we go check it out?" I didn't give her time to reply, or process, the implications of that statement. Instead, I moved towards the area where she had kicked the ball, with no further hesitation.

Dae Hee followed suit, albeit cautiously, and with visible reluctance.

On our way, she chewed her lower lip, looking like she was trying not to hyperventilate or start sobbing from anxiety alone.

As I turned a corner on the other side of the fence, a small building could be seen. I remembered seeing it a couple of times whenever I visited this pitch. A storage unit for maintenance.

And on the ground laid glass shards from what seemed to have been a window that led up to the inside of the storage. A rather small hole had been punched through, and from it, the ball, somehow, had found its way into the unit, rolling who knows where. The rusted doors were barely locked.

"Aw..." Dae Hee whined. "I've broken that."

"From the looks of it, you shouldn't worry about it." I said, inspecting the aged, peeling paint and rusted hinges. "Seems to be abandoned. It's not even locked properly."

"But... what about the damage...?" She squealed.

"I've seen a kid do a lot worse when kicking the ball through his neighbor's front windows. The kid got a scolding, then the neighbor just fixed it himself, at no cost whatsoever, it was an accident in the first place anyway. So don't fret too much." I replied.

I wrenched the two panels of metal apart with brute strength. Now, that didn't happen because I'm so strong, even though I am.

Dae Hee glanced at me in confusion as I slightly chuckled to myself.

"Nothing, nothing."

The aged metal groaned in protest, the lock was barely hanging, as the inside revealed nothing much but darkness and an old, distinct scent. Probably because the place had been exposed to rain, the wooden panels on the floors and some of the metallic beams of the ceiling seemed rusty and rotten.

"Is this really okay...?" Dae Hee gasped, peeking from behind my shoulder.

"It'll be fine, stop worrying about everything and come along."

With that said, I took the lead and walked inside of the shed. Dae Hee followed shortly after.

The shed wasn't entirely dark. It had a couple of skylight windows that were caked in decades worth of grime, allowing for an almost ghostly type of light to illuminate the area, just enough that I could see my way. And within a few minutes, we found the ball, which had conveniently landed on a rather soft pile of fabric. Probably some sort of clothes, or coverings for old equipment.

"This is scary." Dae Hee murmured. "Like one of those places where a slasher film starts, and you know you'll end up running for your life, until eventually they find you, with the big chainsaw."

"You watch that many slasher flicks?"

Dae Hee paused, a hesitant smile flashing on her face. "Well... sometimes." She shrugged. "It's not so scary if you watch it in the light."

"Well, good news, because we're in the light. The place is empty and I'm fairly sure you'd never get a permit for chainsaws to use against intruders."

She huffed out a tiny laugh at that.

I picked up the ball. "Alright, we can leave. See? It wasn't so bad. No injuries, no damages, and—"

"Meow."

"Eeeeek—!"

Dae Hee scuttled behind my back.

Meow?

I frowned and followed the sound with my eyes to find the source.

As it turns out, it was a little, black kitten that seemed to be looking curiously at me.

I blinked. I then gestured with a look to Dae Hee, who, still shaking a bit, finally seemed to realize it was, indeed, just a stray kitten, mewing at them for whatever reason a stray kitten would meow for.

"Hehe..." Dae Hee had the decency to look abashed. "I think I should stop watching those things."

"That, or perhaps do it less often. But now you've definitely lost the right to call me a bad person." I chuckled. The girl pouted at that.

Dae Hee stepped up to the kitten.

"Hey there, cutie." She whispered, crouching low to extend her hand and gently pet it.

It purred happily.

"How adorable."

"Well, let's leave it alone."

"Wha—" She blinked and turned back towards me, confusion written large across her face. Her eyes flicked between the cat and myself several times before she seemed to grasp what it was I had suggested. "No... can't we take it?"

"What?" My brow furrowed. "No. Why would you even assume we would?"

"Well—" Her voice choked off, her face falling as if her own emotions had taken her by surprise. "It looks cold, lonely, and starving..."

I stared at the kitten, noticing that, indeed, the little fella's ribs could almost be visible underneath its fur. It had a small wound, a scar, right over its nose, but its eyes were wide, round, and full of curiosity as they peered out from its fluffy, dark fur. Its ears pricked up attentively as it meowed constantly. I sighed.

"I'm not going to stop if you want to. But it's your responsibility."

Dae Hee was so excited and happy that seemed to be bouncing on the spot, the little fella bouncing along with her.

I looked over the kitten and then at the window we'd broken.

"Right, then. I've got the ball. And you've got the cat. I think we should get out of here."

"R-right!"

She looked down at her new companion and gave it one last gentle pet.

As soon as we were out the door of the building, I gently shut it behind us.

We began walking away from the football field and the cat meowed quietly, but contentedly in the crook of her arm.

I looked back the pitch with a relucant, heart-broken expression. "Well, see you soon my dear..."

Yes, when it came to football, I was truly a maiden in love. And right now, my maiden heart was broken.

After a short, comfortable walk, we stopped by a vending machine.

"Want anything?" I asked, looking over at her. Dae Hee was too preoccupied staring at the kitten's eyes to really pay much attention to me, as the little fella seemed to be pawing and trying to reach out to her hand as much as possible.

Dae Hee blinked. "Uh, sure!" She then smiled. "Whatever you decide."

"Hmm." I placed my ball down, on the ground, and approached the machine. After some consideration, I went with two cans of soda and a cartoon of milk.

I cracked the cartoon of milk open and gave it to the girl, who in turn, placed it in a position the cat could have easier access to. It didn't hesitate, lapping up the liquid as fast as possible. Some even spilled over, the poor thing must've been so hungry and thirsty.

Dae Hee watched it, smiling fondly, like a mother looking after a child. Her face flushed, soft pink dusting her cheeks.

"Ah! You like it that much? Good, good. That's good." She whispered gently. Her tone had a soothing, motherly quality to it.

It was surprising, a little. She didn't look like the maternal type.

But then again, I suppose everyone had some level of natural love for cute, cuddly animals.

I popped open my soda and took a long swig, glancing at Dae Hee from the corner of my eye.

It seemed, without her constant attention being solely directed to the little, mewling fella, she could actually pay some attention to her surroundings and the people that inhabited it.

She watched me for a while, looking somewhat nervous but not uncomfortable, as she took in how I sat beside her. Then she relaxed slightly.

She reached out, grasping her can of soda. "I like cats." She stated simply.

"I can tell." I said lightly, taking another sip of soda. The carbonation burned down my throat. "You look like you'd adopt every stray on the block if you could."

She smiled faintly, her eyes turning towards the kitten. "Maybe I would. I like things that need me."

I tilted my head toward her, but she wasn't looking at me—just cradling the tiny creature like it was made of glass.

The streetlight hummed faintly above us, its glow tracing the curve of her cheek, the slight shadow under her jaw.

"Things that need you, huh?"

"Mm." She nodded. "Things that can't survive without me."

"Is that a requirement for you to show them affection?" My brow furrowed in thought. I turned my head slightly, my gaze following the path of her own until I caught sight of the cat. "Why do you need that?"

"Um, because I don't have that much confidence in me to know if a person could like me on their own, or if they could ever want to be with me if they didn't need something from me." Dae Hee replied. A moment later she seemed to realise something was amiss about what she said and she immediately recoiled. "U-Uh, wait... I...! Uh, pretend you didn't hear that, please...!" Her voice was weak and pleading, her cheeks turning bright red.

"I'll do that." I agreed with an amused smirk, lifting up the soda to take a small sip, only to realize I'd run dry. With an exasperated sigh, I crushed the can and tossed it in a trash can nearby, without needing to move even an inch out of my position, it simply arced through the air with a lazy ease. "You know. Things that only stay because they need you… don't really belong to you. Not completely."

Her head lifted slightly. Her lips parted, but no sound came out.

"Need fades. People find what they were missing and then—" I snapped my fingers softly. "Gone. Just like that. If that's the only reason they're close to you, they were never yours to begin with."

The kitten shifted in her arms, but she didn't even glance down.

"That's why... if you want someone to stay, don't just give them a reason to need you. Needs fade. Give them a reason to choose you, over and over again. A reason to never want anything else." I rolled the ball beneath my foot, letting it pivot lazily. "Of course, that sounds a little too perfect, doesn't it? Realistically, it's not just want, and it's not just need. It's both. A balance. But the tricky part is that everyone's balance looks different."

I leaned back, sighing softly. "And let's be honest... we're greedy little goblins at heart. We cling to comfort, we chase novelty, we repeat habits even when they hurt us. Half the time, we don't even know what we want until we've lost it." The ball stilled under my sole. "So the best we can do is… stop trying to be everything for someone else. Just be something real, something they can't find anywhere else. If that's enough, they'll stay. And if it isn't…" My shoulders lifted in a slow shrug. "Their loss."

"......"

She looked down back at the kitten. It meowed. She smiled. "A reason to never want anything else..." And repeated, softly.

Huh oh. She didn't listen to everything I said, did she?