Chapter 66 — Y3: Horny Music

Haaaa…

Hm?  Oh.  No, it’s -- nothing.

Ugh.  No, it has nothing to do with you.  It’s just a bad day right now, is all.

Yes, obviously.  Everybody has bad days.  If they don’t, then they’re just very very good at dealing with them.

Sometimes it’s just hard to get the energy to do what needs to be done throughout the day, you know?

…I’d ask for a break from storytime, but, frankly, that would probably make things worse instead of better.

…Okay.  Okay!  Let’s do this!

Fake it ‘till you make it!

Let me start with the latest blessing that I got, right after giving birth to my amazing yeti baby!

[Blessing:  Broodmare][Requirements:  Give birth to four monsters that have an intelligence at category 5 or higher][Effects:  Increased fecundity.  All children you give birth to have a random trait improved by one category.  Monster children you have will view you as a perfect potential mate.]

Yeah, it’s a kinky one -- eh?  Ah, good question.

When I said ‘intelligence at category 5 or higher’, that’s the internal category system used by the gods.  It means that they’re smarter than the average dog.

…Right, right, for reference, dogs can remember solutions but they can’t figure out solutions.  They can learn how to open a door once they see it happen, or do it by accident themselves, but they can’t figure out how to do so themselves.  So this is roughly the level of some birds like crows, and other basic tool users.

When I originally got the blessing it was interpreted as, roughly, ‘give birth to four monsters that are, at minimum, capable of tool use and basic logical deduction’.  But because I know the internal categories used, it instead uses that when I mentally check on it.

This is one of several blessings that Raleine, goddess of monsters, can hand out.

There’s actually a hilarious blessing she can give called ‘Blessing:  Monster’s Lament’, that she gives to people who overhunt or who cause overhunting of monsters, along with those that needlessly torture them.

…It gives a massive damage reduction to all monsters, and makes all monsters hate you, specifically.

It also gives a massive bonus to understanding how monsters feel about you!  To make it, technically, not a curse, but a blessing.

Mind, all that you get out of that blessing is a sense of raw, personal hatred, due to its other effects, but still!

There’s also ones for monster tamers, monster imitators, monster followers, monster worshipers… the one I got was the one for monster fuckers.

I got it right after giving birth to my adorable little big yeti, the blessing's warmth giving just that little tiny bit more reward for being a mother.  Oh I just know that he grew up into a strong and powerful slut fucker!

…Wait, that’s my brainwashing speaking.

…

…It doesn’t feel like brainwashing, but it’s probably brainwashing.

Eh?  Right.  Moving on.

According to The Plan, I had to get [Technosymbiosis] next.  Which required a total of five or more cybernetic implants.

…Well, technically I had to start getting Kaiser interested in me, but with [Broodmare] all I had to do was show up so he could sense how fertile I’d become.  I’d already done all of the foundational work required, like showing how weak and fuckable I was.

So, five or more implants.  Fortunately, I already had one.  They’re the lovely additions to my piercings, that make them able to change shape, vibrate, hide, and impossible to steal!

…?  I mean, obviously.  How else could it be impossible to steal?

…Why would I want to do that?

Ugh, look, yes, they’re impossible to remove, but come on!

They make me look hot!

See the bars they’re shaped like now, and how they push out from my top?

H!  O!  T!

Hot!

Being impossible to remove is just a boon as far as I’m concerned.

Hrmph.

Now.  [Technosymbiosis].  This meant I had to spend time with the Empirical Empress.

Which I knew was going to be just… great.

Haaaa…

At least the two ambassadors could deal with Big Bull and Kaiser essentially on their own, so I didn’t have to worry about that.

I just had to deal with an insane robotic empress that wanted to adopt me!

Which was… ugh.  Okay, so, this is going to get a bit complicated, but I want you to understand how nightmarish this was to plan.

Unlike parasites, which you could just find wandering around the second landmass, cybernetic implants had a much stricter requirement to obtain.  You had to either purchase them at insane markups, or get the Empirical Empress to give them to you herself.

There were a few one-off events that you could, technically, trigger in Alchemical Corruption Twelve, but those were… ugh.  Not worth even trying to go for.

Now, while I was, at the time, rather more flush with cash than I had been in prior years, it wasn’t enough that I could just ignore the cost of a cybernetic implant.  Those things are expensive, because nobody knows how to make them; they salvage them, or make them with ‘divine inspiration’.  The elite of the elite weren’t interested in them, because natural growth had less limits -- but the mundane of the elite adored them.  Having eyes that could zoom in like a telescope was a fad for a while, actually…

This meant that cybernetic implants were rare to come across on the market, and were wanted by the upper crust of the Kingdom’s nobility.  So they cost money.  A lot of money.

Having the backing of the two kings helped, but if we just had them buy all five for me I’d get some interesting glances from the gods.  Primarily the chief god.  They could, and did, help me purchase two more useful implants, but I could hardly afford the remaining two I required on my own.

Thus, the best option I had was getting the Empirical Empress to give me two more!!

But, ah…

…Let me just list a few examples of implants she could grant you, okay?  And when I say 'prosthetic' in this list, I don't mean this world's prosthetics, I mean that the person with them can not know or forget that their prosthetic bits aren't biological if there's no obvious added features or effects.

Those and more were possibilities that she’d give.

Which you got, in the game, depended on what she thought of you, your level of corruption, any body modifiers you had, as well as a huge heaping dose of random chance.

Yeah.  Ideally, I’d save scum until I got installations that were decent, but that wasn’t an option here.

So instead, I had to play nice with a kooky robotic empress, ooo-ing and aaa-ing over every little thing she did, and try my best to manipulate what she gave me.

…this failed the first time I entered her palace after giving birth to the yeti.

See, I had been, ah… ‘busy’, with my recent bout of pregnancies.  And during the last one, I couldn’t even visit her at all.  I wanted to get in at least one visit with her before the mid-year holiday Festival, so I rushed over as soon as I could…

…and forgot to bring a gift to appease her.

This left her rather… irritated, at being ignored for so long.

Mind, ‘so long’ for her was more like, oh… a week and a half, tops, but I'm pretty sure I've told you plenty of times before that she's insane.

When I entered her palace, I had just long enough to have a short conversation with her and drink some drugged tea before I passed out.

When next I woke, I had horns.

No, I’m not kidding.  Mind, they didn’t look like they do now -- I only got my appearance cleaned up and made uniform during the fourth year.  At the time, they looked plasticky.  At the very least they weren’t shiny or reflective.  But they were big, and obvious.

My head also ached a bit from the ‘surgery’.

…To be frank, it took all my willpower to avoid freaking out when I realized she had knocked me out and installed something into my head.

It’s important to keep in mind that while, sure, MISSY is a fun lewd playground when looked at from a distance… when you actually examine it closely it was really fucked up.  Modesty and the other goddesses do a lot of heavy lifting to soften it, but, um.

…I was once told that I'm such a natural prodigy of a slut that it's a superpower, that I can just roll with anything pretty smoothly so long as sex is involved.

It.  Um.  Y-yeah.  That kind of got to me.

Uh, Anyway!  I managed to keep calm long enough to get out a formal apology that I hadn’t visited her in so long, and to warn her that I wouldn’t be able to show up for two weeks, given the Festival that happens on the sixth month of each year.

She was… less than pleased with that, but with some insistence that it wasn’t a choice I could make, she accepted it.

…Mostly.

It made going back to her later more interesting…

…Regardless.

At the time, I didn’t know what the horns did; I was too preoccupied on ‘getting the fuck away’, she didn't volunteer telling me before I left, and afterwards I was trying very, very hard to not think about it too hard.

I only learned what they did during the Festival, and boy was that a trip.

The main thing that my horns did -- well, do, they still do it -- is pick up random signals and wire them straight to my brain.

I don’t know how, but the Empress somehow managed to make it work with magical signals as well as technological ones.  Frankly these abominations of science shouldn’t be possible, but as they're literally wired into my brain without any side effects I or anyone else has ever been able to find, I can’t argue about it too much.

I was out at the Festival with Shimizu when they first acted up.  I was wearing an adorable miniskirt with a nice, thin top that showed off my hoop piercings, and heels that gave me half a food of height~

…What?

It made me look hot!  What’s with that look?

Ugh, whatever.

I also made sure that my makeup was perfect, because we were going on a date~!

Well, ah.

I say ‘date’.

I really mean -- erm --

-- okay, so, the thing is…

…well…

…

O-okay, yes, yes, it was a date, I just didn’t realize at the time!

I was so used to our outings being excuses to fuck me that I completely blanked on even the possibility of it being an actual date!

I even overheard Takeo warning Shimizu that ‘she won’t know what you’re doing unless you tell her in as painfully specific a manner as possible’, and I thought they were talking about Yuki!

I mean, come on, Yuki’s a bit nuts, it was a rational thought!

Anyway!

She was leading me through the Festival on its second day.  The first day was far too crowded, but the second one had calmed down enough that it was… technically possible to walk through the crowds without bumping into somebody.

I bumped into, ah.

…It felt like everybody.

I blame my massive tits, hips, and ass for it.

We were looking at the stalls and buying Festival-only goodies, getting our fortunes told, and playing Festival games when -

- eh?  Oh, no, I see the misunderstanding.

Yuki’s [Seer] talent is hardly the only talent out there that can predict the future.  Hers is actually one of the more powerful variants, but there are versions like [Future Simulation], [Averaged Prediction], and [Fate Reading].

Shimizu’s fortunes tended to be pretty positive!  ‘Become the undisputed master of the blade’, ‘gain a harem of adoring sluts’, ‘power and popularity alike shall rain down upon you’!

Mine were all about how I’d end up as a sex slave, addicted to monster cock, kidnapped to become a broodmare cow…

…I mean they weren’t wrong, those were things likely to happen to me, but still!

Hrmph.

…Oh!  Right.  The horns.

So we were walking around the Festival when I had an odd thought.

I thought of a very vivid tune coming from a piano.

I then thought of a young woman’s voice, one that I had never heard before, singing, “You have the keys to the lock on my heart~  It’s right there!  It’s in your cock!”

I’ve mentioned how ‘sluts’ are a known phenomenon.

I never mentioned how this meant there were entire slut-focused media franchises.

Somebody, I still don’t know who, had a magical recording of ‘Keys to the Lock, Erotic Version’, and was playing it at the Festival.

I need to emphasize that this wasn’t something I was hearing.

I was thinking it.  I knew the difference even then; I was just thinking it so vividly that it was as if I was hearing it.  My ears were still working just fine.  It’s my brain that wasn’t.  I’m rather fortunate that my brain slug parasite doesn’t pick up these kinds of signals and make things even worse.  No hallucination-O-vision TV shows for me!

…Wait, actually, that sounds kind of cool… Maybe if I… Nevermind, hot storytime first.

I was, naturally, fairly panicked.  It didn’t help that the longer the song went, the more drenched in sexuality it became -- the singer clearly an expert in making it sound like she was drenched with arousal while hitting the high notes.

And, well, you know me.

…I was getting distracted by it.  More than a little, frankly.

I had to tug Shimizu away from the crowds of the Festival to try to explain what was going on, but what came out of my mouth were the lyrics to the song.

‘You’re the one for me, the only one that makes me feel at ease~  You’re the one for me, the only one that makes me scream ‘yes please’!  You’re the one for me, the only one with the key~  You’re the one for me, the only one!  Can’t you see?’

Now, see, the song in question was actually a fairly popular love song among the local sluts.  Shimizu actually recognized it, whereas I didn’t.

So there I was, trying to explain that something was going wrong -- and instead I was belting out the lyrics to an erotic love song.

And it was then that I learned that this was a date.

My thoughts were jumbled, but, uh…

…

Okay, you think this is going to end in sex, yeah?

Well, it kinda does, but not right away.

See, Shimizu jumped backwards with wide eyes as the lyrics kept belting out of my mouth, and she said, ‘Uh, Elizabeth -- um -- I mean -- I like you, but this was -- it was just a date, not a confession!’

…I’m frankly not sure what irritated me more at the time.

The fact that she wasn’t taking this chance to fuck me, or the fact that I tried to keep on singing even while I was clamping my hands over my mouth!

Ugh.  These horns can be so incredibly annoying at times…

After the latest unannounced break, I'm going to be making some changes to my release schedule.

Please note that these are subject to change.  They are, currently, intended to be temporary.

That said, for now, here is what you need to know:

For the most part, things aren't really changing.  I still intend to get through this entire thing.

As an aside, if you intend to subscribe to my subscribestar, wait for the time being.  Until I figure out what my plans are for that, and finalize them.  I've been having some issues with it, but I know what I need to do.

And, of course, thank you all for reading!