Chapter 31: You Can Never Go Home

Summary: Perspectives from the other half of the split of group...

Warning Chapters 29-32 were all published back to back! Make sure you don't miss one.

Chapter 31: You Can Never Go Home

It felt…odd was the best word for it, she supposed. It felt odd to be back in the Room of a Thousand Fountains. Not wrong, per se, just a little off somehow. The Temple had been her home so long that only her oldest memories, most of them unpleasant, recalled Ryloth to her. Those memories were sharper and more complete than they would have been for most species, a benefit of the extra storage Twi'lek lekku gave her. But that sharpness only reaffirmed to her that Ryloth had never really fully met the qualification of home to her. Perhaps it had to a child, in a way. But as an adult who knew better, she recognized that the first place she'd really found a home and something approximating family was here at the Temple.

Which is why it was disconcerting that it now felt somehow oppressive, instead of welcoming.

In hindsight, she thought that Master Quinlan had probably felt the same. It likely contributed to how rarely he'd brought her back here, after taking her as a padawan. Not to mention how irritable he became if they had to spend longer than a few days here. He'd had a handful of good friends in the Order, of course. Knight Kenobi, who'd been oddly close to her master despite the two being such polar opposites, had even come by and given her his condolences for her loss. Yet, she now suspected that her former Master had been no more at home with the majority of the Order than she now felt. Her conversations with first Master Fay, and then Masters Bnar and Morne, had forever shifted her own views on the Jedi's place in the galaxy. Not to mention both their and Izuku's effects on her understanding of the Force itself.

Kriff, even the Council had commented on that bit, on their first day back. Master Yoda had outright stated that she'd gained a deeper understanding of the Force from her experiences. Which, thankfully, she'd been able to convincingly pin on her discussions and healing with Master Fay. All of their little conspiracy, even Tholme, had agreed that leaving Ood Bnar and Celeste Morne out of the story for now was for the best. And her new Master, something which had just been formally confirmed an hour ago, had helped redirect questions away from the gaps leaving them out had left in the tale.

Izuku's part had been included in the telling of the tale, of course. There had been no way to avoid that much. But his Force Sensitivity had been mentioned only in passing, Tholme knowing how to spin that to make it seem like he was simply an untrained Force Sensitive. That happened, fairly frequently in fact, and usually resulted in nothing more than random spurts of what seemed like luck to most. Or perhaps a particularly sharp gift with piloting or sharpshooting.

The truth would out, in time, if their plans went anywhere. But when it did, they would be able to point out that they'd mentioned he was Force Sensitive, and it was only the High Council's own assumption that he was untrained. His extra-dimensional origins, of course, had gotten no mention at all. For that was something that would have brought him far too much attention from the Council of First Knowledge, instead of the High Council.

More surprisingly to Aayla, even Yoda had failed to pick up on her bond to Izuku. It was glaringly obvious to her, even so far from him. But, according to Master Tholme, the farther they'd gotten from Izuku, the more it had blended in with her connection to the Force itself. By the time they'd reached the Temple, even he had only been able to find that bond because he'd already known it was there. Which…made a sort of sense, she realized now. At least if Izuku's Quirk really was what Ood Bnar thought it was. In that case, at this distance, the bond would likely look like just another midi-chlorian, fulfilling its role as a translator for the Force. An odd thought, but something that had proven immensely useful as her new bond had gone undetected and therefore unquestioned. So far.

Oh…

A sense of disquiet filled Aayla as she examined that thought and the realization that slowly came with it. With a sense of mixed loss and alienation, she finally realized why she no longer felt at home here. Not only had her perspective on a Jedi's place in the galaxy changed, but so had she. She had changed to the point that she was now in need of actively keeping secrets from the people who were the only approximation of family she'd ever had. No longer was the Temple a place to go to for comfort and rest. Instead, it was a place where she would forever after need to keep her guard up. It was not a comforting thought, but she refused to let the sense of loss consume her. Falling deeper into her meditation, she focused instead on all that she had gained, instead of all that she had lost. She would not run from the hurt. But neither would she let it dominate her thoughts…

... ...

"Remarkable."

Aayla was a bit too busy trying to catch her breath to preen, but she certainly wanted to, given the impressed sounding tone in Master Drallig's voice. Recently appointed as the Battlemaster of the Order, Aayla knew him as one of its premier lightsaber instructors. He'd caught her practicing her altered forms and apparently seen something interesting enough to ask for a match.

"I remember your style before, and you've improved to a truly remarkable extent, Padawan. Given the rumors you've spent time with Master Fay, the mixing of some Niman methods into Ataru for greater usage of telekinesis is perhaps expected. More impressive and confusing, however, are both the subtle changes to how you're using the Force to enhance your movments and the changed footwork to some of your core stances. You're actually using telekinesis to move your body like a puppet at times, aren't you?"

Aayla had to suppress a moment of panic at the Battlemaster picking that out. It was a trick that had caught even Master Morne off guard, with Aayla having picked it up from Izuku. She had begun to integrate it into her own fighting style even before Tholme began helping her refine her new style with everything else she'd learned recently. The trick was simply too good an addition to her Ataru-based style for her not to have jumped on the idea when Izuku had first explained it to her.

"Yes, Master Drallig. It was something I figured out after having been exposed to someone with far more precise control of telekinesis. It's not exactly easy, but it adds quite a bit of extra speed to some of Ataru's moves, even incomplete as my mastery of the idea is so far."

Thankfully, the Battlemaster didn't seem to have picked up on her moment of panic, simply nodding along.

"It does. You actually almost broke my guard the first time you did it. No mean feat for a Padawan! Admittedly, that was mostly surprise. I haven't seen that particular trick used very often, and never by a Padawan before. It's clear you're still new to it and need some refinement. But I can set you up with a few exercises for that easily enough."

Aayla blinked in surprise, not having been aware that she was essentially reproducing an existing technique. Though she supposed she shouldn't be. Movement and telekinesis were both core tenants of the Jedi fighting style. Of course someone would have put the two together before.

"That would be appreciated, Master. I've been somewhat haphazard in my application so far…"

The older human nodded, smiling at the admission.

"Understandable, since you seem to have stumbled onto the trick on your own. Now, however, I'd also like to know where you got the refinements to your footwork. They are good, much better suited to precision and telekinetic augmentation. But where did they come from? That little Force Assisted hop for a height advantage was particularly interesting."

Oh. Shit. That was one of the tricks that Master Morne had taught her to add power to precision strikes. Time to deflect!

"Ah. Those are more a mix of additions. Some are the result of Master Tholme trying to help me integrate several things I've learned recently into my overall style. Others are actually from the Force Sensitive that rescued me while my memory was scrambled. He was quite skilled with blasters…but he also took me apart in unarmed combat. Even after I got my memories and skills back completely, as it happens. Apparently, he specifically trained for that. Somewhat like the Echani do, only more focused on power to a point. He said it was a mix of several styles. The only two he mentioned specifically were called Muay Tai and Krav Maga…"

Aayla sighed in relief as Cin Drallig's eyes lit up in interested and he started asking for details about those fighting styles. If she worked in the alterations Celeste had made to her style in with the explanations of a few moves she'd adopted from Izuku, she was sure she could bluff her way through this…

... ...

Tholme suppressed a sad smile, doing his best to replace it with a grin as his new Padawan seemed to slump in relief as their transport jumped out of the Coruscant system. He'd all too often felt similar relief in leaving the Temple behind in the last two decades. His nature as a Shadow, as well as his own relationship with a certain fellow Jedi, had often caused him to be a bit ill at ease with the rest of the order. It was a bit tragic to see the same repeated in one still so young, however. Even Quinlan hadn't become quite so uncomfortable with the Temple quite so quickly.

At least Aayla had hidden her discomfiture better than his former Padawan. If she hadn't managed that much, they might still be stuck there undergoing greater scrutiny. As it was, she'd managed to act normal enough that a mere month had been sufficient to reassure the various Councils that she had recovered from her ordeal and the loss of Quinlan. The fact that he'd been able to conjure with the name of Master Fay, as well as his own accepted status as an accomplished healer, had helped lower the scrutiny she'd faced. As had the new depth to her ability with the Force, which was admittedly quite impressive for even a younger Knight, let alone a Padawan. The girl was going to be something special. It just remained to see if it would be as a Jedi, or something else entirely.

"Looking forward to seeing your boyfriend so much, Padawan? Or just glad to escape Master Drallig?"

Aayla crinkled her nose in his direction at that comment, though it did draw her back into the present nicely as she snorted in response a moment later.

"We aren't even going straight back, Master. And Master Drallig was…helpful. If a little bit intense."

Tholme chuckled. That was underselling it a bit. The Battlemaster had seen the rapid improvements in Aayla's style and insisted on working her hard to properly integrate them. To be honest, Tholme was pleased with that. It had both served to distract Aayla, while also doing a better job than he could have, so quickly at least, of helping her fully absorb what she'd picked up from Izuku, Morne, and Fay.

"He was, at that. But as you say, it was helpful to your style's development."

Aayla nodded, but quickly changed the subject.

"Why Kiffu, Master? I know we shouldn't keep treading the same ground by returning every time to Anash for ships. But why…there?"

Tholme considered what to tell her. There were multiple reasons, after all.

"Part of the reason is that I still have contacts there, having been the Jedi Watchman for the sector years ago." His eyes darted to his Padawan and he decided to add a personal detail. One he suspected would go a long way to helping her relax around him. "Another is that the current Jedi Watchman there is Master T'ra Saa. Who I happen to have a very similar relationship with as you do with young Izuku."

He smirked as that comment caused the young Twi'lek to shoot up ramrod straight and stare at him in shock.

"What? I did tell you that I'm more a follower of the old Jedi ways than the new, now didn't I?"

He took considerable satisfaction at her stunned opening and quick closing of her mouth, clearly not sure exactly what to say. Before she could really work up the words to question him on something he'd really prefer to keep private, he distracted her with another detail.

"And quite aside from those two details, which will help us acquire another ship or two for the collection…I also happen to have discovered a lead on one Asanté Vos. Who helped your uncle wipe your memory, as well as personally killed Quinlan. A particularly unforgiveable crime, given they were from the same clan. I assumed you would want to be along when I tracked her down."

Aayla's eyes hardened, but Tholme was pleased to feel only determination radiating off of her, not rage. Master Fay truly had helped her through the worst of it. But this little side mission would help both of them get closer, while also letting Tholme assess if there had been any lasting damage to his new Padawan's equilibrium that still needed to be addressed…

... ... ... ...

A/N: So! Differing perspectives! I'm intending to use these sparingly. But they DO serve a needed function of being able to give us a glimpse into what is happening elsewhere. Here, it let me skim over Aayla's need to be seen back at the Jedi Order, without simply having her vanish for a few months. It also lets me develop the characters in a bit more depth, I think...